Second Chances
by Ann Parker
Summary: JJ/Reid - Post 7x07. When things end between JJ and Will, who will pick up the pieces? Can their relationship handle all that has gone on between them, all that has been left unsaid?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters of "Criminal Minds." They are the property of Mark R. Gordon and CBS. This is for entertainment purposes only.

Author's Note: I know, I know, its been forever! I think my thesis temporarily killed my creative energy because I just hadn't had a spark to write until watching the current season. From the JJ/Reid scenes in the second episode, to the JJ/Will scenes a few weeks ago, I finally got inspired to pursue a fanfic with my favorite shipper couple. If you're not a fan of JJ/Reid, then this may not be for you. You've been for warned.

This is meant to take directly after the ending of 7x07 "There's no Place like Home." It may or may not incorporate things from upcoming episodes, just depends on how it fits. Also, for the sake of some later chapters, I'm going to say that this episode took place in mid October. That will make sense later.

Now, without further ado!

Thanks,

Ann

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><p>She looked…<p>

Broken. That was the best word Reid could come up with right now. After hanging up her phone from reading Henry his bedtime story, JJ had gone to one of the corners of the police station and was staring out the window, watching the storm that kept her from getting home to her family. Emily had tried to talk to her, to comfort her, but to no avail so the rest of the team was giving her some space. Only Hotch could really understand what it was like knowing that your child needed you when you couldn't be there, but that didn't stop the rest from feeling for her.

Particularly Reid. That was why he couldn't stop watching her from a distance. When he had heard about Henry having a seizure and seen the pain on JJ's face, all he wanted to do was pull her into a hug. Considering his general rule of limited human contact, that was a big deal to him. But he knew he couldn't, not because they were in the middle of a case, but because he was pretty sure he hadn't earned back that right yet. Although the pair had talked after Rossi's cooking lesson and were on much better terms, he knew it would be awhile before they got back to where they were pre-Doyle.

"Just go talk to her, man." Reid snapped out of his revere to see Morgan standing next to him. Reid blinked twice and turned his gaze back the person some twenty feet away.

"I can't. You saw how she shut down Emily; I don't stand a chance. We're…not ready." He didn't see Morgan roll his eyes, but he did see him shake his head out of his peripheral vision.

"Bull. You need to get over what happened in Oklahoma, I'm pretty sure she has. Besides, who better than to comfort her than her son's godfather?" Reid looked his friend, who just stared back at him, dead serious. He was right, this was about Henry more than anything else and he loved that little guy. Taking a deep breath, he nodded and headed over to JJ.

Although she didn't show it, she could see him approaching through the reflection of the window. She continued to stare at the pouring rain and flashes of lighting, waiting for him to speak first. A part of her wanted to lunge at him, to feel the comfort of his touch, but she wasn't sure he would be ready for that. So she waited. Finally, after a minute she heard his soft voice over her left shoulder.

"Hey."

"He-ey," she answered, her voice cracking slightly, thick from the tears she had shed tonight. She couldn't help the guilt that had washed over her for not being there for Henry. She turned to face him, tear streaks still fresh on her face.

"Oh Jayje…" Any self-control he had was lost the moment he saw the pain in her blue eyes. He raised his hands to her face, using his thumbs to gently wipe away her tears before pulling her into his arms. JJ instantly wrapped her arms around him, holding him close. She felt him rest his chin on the top of her head and sighed. She only ever felt this safe when she was in _his_ arms, not that she would ever admit that to him. Or Will.

"Henry is going to be fine. Febrile seizures happen in about 5% of kids from 6 months to 6 years, and most grow out of it before they turn five. There are rarely any complications," he stated after a few minutes. He rubbed her back slightly, before pulling back and looking into her eyes. "He's a strong kid, just like his mom. He'll be fine."

JJ's smile even reached her eyes, cutting through her guilt. "Thanks Spence."

"You're welcome," he smiled back, officially letting her go. Neither acknowledged the chill from the lack of warmth of each other's bodies as he took a step back. They turned back to the window, noticing the rain starting to lighten up. They stood there in silence for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts. Although they didn't know it, both were thinking about a certain two-year old…and each other.

Eventually, Reid looked at her out of the corner of his eye, his sudden burst of courage from earlier gone.

"Um, JJ, do you think I could, um…" JJ turned to look at him, tilting her head slightly, letting him finish. "…maybe come by this weekend and visit with Henry? I mean, if he's feeling up for it? I just haven't really visited him since…" Reid chose not to finish that statement, not wanting to bring up the whole Emily fight from weeks earlier.

"I think that would be great Spence. I'll let you know if he's not up for visitors yet. How about Sunday?" JJ tucked some of her hair behind her ear, thankful for a conversation distracting her from her mixture of feelings right now. And that Reid actually wanted to visit again.

"Sunday sounds great." They smiled at each other for a second.

"Hey guys, the weather is cleared up enough for us to go back to the hotel and get some sleep." Both turned to see Morgan in front of them. "You ready to go?"

JJ was the first to speak. "Yeah, just let me grab my things." She made a quick glance at Reid before walking away, leaving Morgan staring and smiling at Reid.

The younger man glared at him. "What?"

"Looks like things are back to normal between you two, then?"

Reid shrugged as the pair started towards the exit. "Getting there." Morgan gently patted him on the shoulder as they met the rest of the team by the exit, ready to head out in the rain and hopefully wash this case off of them.

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><p>He shifted nervously on his feet, taking a deep breath. <em>Calm down<em>, he told himself, _its just JJ and Henry. And Will. _ Truth be told, he had never particularly cared for the New Orleans native, but he figured that had more to do with his feelings for the mother than anything else. Regardless, he always felt like he was walking on eggshells when Will was around, like he didn't trust him. Perhaps he had picked up on Reid's feeling for JJ, but surely Will should have realized by now that he would never act on them. And not just because he knew JJ didn't feel the same way, but because he wouldn't spilt up a family like that. Having come from a broken home, he wouldn't do that to Henry.

Shaking those thoughts out of his head, he finally knocked on the blue door in front of him. Soon he found two of his favorite blonds facing him from the other side of the door, the younger one straddling his mom's hip.

"'Pence!" exclaimed the two year old, reaching out to him. Reid smiled and offered out his arms, taking Henry and hugging the little boy tight to him. His body contact rule was null and void when it came to Henry. JJ smiled as she closed the door after Reid crossed the threshold. It always warmed her heart how much Reid let his guard down with her son and how much Henry loved him in return.

"Hey Henry, how are you feeling bud?"

"Good! Hey, wat tat?" The toddler finally noticed the green bag Reid was carrying. Reid chuckled and crouched down, setting Henry on his feet and so that he was down to his level.

"Oh this? Well I heard there was a sick little boy here that could use some cheering up, but if you're good then I guess its not you. Is there another sick boy here?" Reid teased, pretending to look around. JJ smiled and just watched the scene before her.

"No, tat me!" Henry exclaimed, pouting a little.

"It is? Well, then this is for you!" Reid pretended to be surprised, ruffling up Henry's hair.

"Yay! Can I open mama?" he asked, looking at JJ. JJ joined Reid at Henry's level and nodded. The young boy quickly pulled the tissue paper out of the bag to find a stuffed stegosaurus and a dinosaur book. JJ bit back a giggle, not at all surprised by the gift choice. "Cool!" Henry yelled.

"What do we say?" JJ asked.

"Tank you 'Pence!" he replied and hugged Reid again.

"You're very welcome." JJ and Reid glanced at each other and smiled.

"Let's play!" Henry's excitement interrupting a moment they didn't realize they were having.

The adults stood up. "Just a second, bud. Why don't you go introduce your new friend to the rest? I'll be there in a second." Reid had helped Henry develop quite the collection of stuffed dinosaurs over the past two years.

Henry nodded. "K!" He ran around the corner to his playroom, leaving the two adults alone in the front hallway.

"You really didn't need to get him anything," JJ stated, picking up the thrown about tissue paper and gift bag.

"I wanted to. I love that he's excited about dinosaurs." Reid nervously shoved his hands into his pockets as JJ set the bag on the side table near the door.

She laughed a little, "I think he gets that excitement from his Uncle Spence, but that's okay with me."

Reid smiled and then looked around. "Where's Will?"

JJ sighed. "At the bar with some friends watching the Saints game." Noticing the confused look on his face, she added, "the New Orleans football team. We don't get the game on local TV so he left to watch it. He needed a break and I figured I owed him one."

"For what?" Reid asked, "leaving to do your job? JJ, he knew what our job was like long ago. You shouldn't have to apologize or owe him anything."

JJ opened her mouth to answer him when a child's voice interrupted them. "Come on!" exclaimed Henry, having reappeared. Both adults laughed.

"Okay, okay, I'm coming." Reid answered, taking Henry's hand and letting the child lead him to his toys.

JJ sighed as she watched them go. She knew he was right, but a part of her couldn't help but feel guilty anyway. It didn't help that her return to the BAU was a constant argument the couple was having lately. It seemed like lately all they did was fight and it generally went back to one or two topics. She wasn't sure how much more of it she could take, but she was trying to work past it. For Henry. Pushing those thoughts aside, she quickly joined the boys.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews so far! Please keep them coming. I would love feedback since it's been awhile since I've written anything. Thanks, Ann

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><p>JJ smiled as Reid finished telling Henry a story. She loved how animated he got, making different facial expressions and using different voices. She knew Henry loved it too. She was sitting on the foot of Henry's bed as her son was curled up next to his godfather. The young boy had tired out quickly from playing since he was still recovering from his illness and asked for Reid to read him a story before his nap. She could see Henry's eyes were starting to droop but he was trying to stay awake to hear the ending. It was a scene that truly warmed her heart.<p>

The noise of the front door closing snapped her out of her thoughts. She mouthed 'be right back' to Reid, who nodded and continued to read. She exited her son's room and met Will part way on the stairs.

"How was the game? I hadn't expected you back this early," she asked. She tried to hide her reaction to the alcohol smell on him, it only being a little before five in the afternoon.

"I bet you didn't. How's Henry?" he asked, glancing at the closed door. He had noticed Reid's car in the driveway.

"He got tired out pretty quickly so Spence is reading him a story before he takes a nap." JJ stiffened slightly, she had heard this tone of voice before and it only spelled trouble. Still, she tried to ignore it.

"Leaving plenty of time for the adults to play, huh?" he leered accusingly at her and moved past her, walking into their bedroom.

JJ took a deep breath. So this was going to be the next fight, her relationship with Spence? They were best friends and Will knew that long before they got serious, before Henry was even conceived. Yes, there was a part of JJ that would always love Spence the way she couldn't love Will, but she wouldn't cheat on him. Besides, Spence didn't see her that way. Calmly, she turned around and followed him into their room and closed the door, probably a little harder than she meant to.

"What exactly are you accusing me of, Will?"

"You know exactly what I'm saying, cher. You're in love with Spencer. Probably always have been. I was just the one you used to warm your bed, right?" The look in his eyes told her he was dead serious.

She swallowed hard. "I…I don't know what you're talking about. I love you."

Will shook his head. "No you don't. At least not the way two people with a child really should. You love me for giving you Henry, but not enough to want to commit to me. Why do you think we're not married? You know I wanted to back when we first found out you were pregnant. And how old is Henry now?"

JJ sat down on the edge of the bed. "That's not fair. You know why I don't want that."

Will rolled his eyes, "Oh yes, that's right. Because your parents got divorced when you were young."

"That's right. And I don't want that pain for Henry." She couldn't believe they were having this fight. Again. Why did it seem like they always repeated these things?

* * *

><p>Reid froze, torn as to what to do. Henry had fallen asleep almost as soon as JJ had left the room. He was going to sneak out of the room and bid goodbye when he heard another door slam shut. It had sounded like their bedroom since it was nearby. Then he heard yelling. Somewhat muted yelling, but he could recognize a fight when he heard it. It reminded him of when he's parents fought and he winced, thinking about-<p>

"I dot like fights," whispered the young boy next to him. Reid sighed, that's what he was afraid of. He looked down to see a pair of sad blue eyes looking back at him. He hugged him closer.

"I don't either, bud. Sometimes people get upset with each other and when they do, they raise their voices. Doesn't make it any easier to listen to though."

"You dot yell at mommy, 'Pence." The guilt that washed over Reid could have capsized a yacht as he thought about just a few weeks earlier, looking away.

"Actually, I have Henry. I got mad at your mom for that time when your Aunt Emily was away, even though it wasn't her fault. I was hurt and hurt her to feel better. It wasn't very nice of me." Suddenly, he felt a small hand on his cheek and he looked back at his godson.

"Mommy forgive?" Reid nodded. "Then I do too." The toddler hugged him and he hugged him right back.

"You see, she forgave me, so I'm sure your mommy and daddy will forgive each other too, okay?" Henry nodded. Reid glanced at the clock, it was just after five. "Hey, you want some dinner?" Henry nodded again. "Okay, let's go downstairs and find something to eat." He scooped up the boy and quietly exited his room, closing the door behind him. He hoped going downstairs would get them away from the fight and spare the child of more pain.

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><p>"And you don't think having his parents live together with no real sign of commitment is going to help him? No, there's more to it."<p>

JJ sighed, "Fine! Yes, there's more to it. Do you know why my parents got divorced? They couldn't handle my sister's suicide and blamed each other. Two of the strongest people I know and their marriage couldn't handle…" She couldn't even finish the sentence, the pain too much. Her hand immediately went to the necklace around her neck.

"And you think that because they couldn't handle that pain, that we can't make it either? Do you see our relationship as that fragile?" He sat down next to her. She glanced up at him and the look in her eyes said it all. He hung his head. "I see. Well, now I finally get why you went back to the BAU."

She looked at him, "What do you mean? You know why."

Will chuckled slightly. "No. You say it's to help people, and it is true that you do. But you really went back because you feel more love and support from that team than you do with me, despite me giving it my all." He stood from the bed and went to the closet and pulled out a bag to pack some things.

"Will. Don't go. We can get through this." She stood in the middle of the room, tears streaming down her face. He didn't say anything for a few minutes as he finished packing. "Please. This is just the alcohol talking."

He zipped up his bag and walked over to her, shaking his head. "Afraid not, cher. This is something I've thought about for a while now. The alcohol may have just finally allowed it to come out." He studied her eyes for a moment. "If you can honestly tell me that you don't think there is someone better for you," he paused, looking at their door, hinting at someone in particular, before looking back at her "than me, then I'll stay. If not, then I can't stay in the way anymore. For everyone's sake."

JJ swallowed hard and opened her mouth to answer, but couldn't find the words. Will smiled softly. "That's what I thought. Give Henry a kiss for me. I'm going to crash at a buddy's place for a few days and we can talk then." He kissed her cheek softly before walking out the door, leaving her standing by their bed, alone.

She cried for a few minutes, still in shock at what had just happened. This day had gone from a fun one with Henry and Spence to this.

"Oh god, Spence…" she whispered, just now remembering she had left him in Henry's room. Had he heard that fight? Of course he had, they weren't exactly quiet. Had he heard what Will correctly accused her of being? If Will had seen she was in love with him, had he figured it out too and just didn't say anything? All these thoughts came rushing to her but she realized that she needed to take one thing at a time.

She walked into the bathroom connected to the bedroom and splashed some water on her face, trying to rinse away her tear stains. After taking a few deep breaths, she left the room and quietly opened Henry's door with a brave face. Only she didn't fine Spence, or Henry for that matter. A momentary flash of panic consumed her. Where did they go? She rushed down the stairs and started to turn the corner when she heard Henry's giggle.

"Oh thank God," she muttered, letting out a sigh as she realized it was coming from the kitchen. As she continued down the hall she was met by two sets of laughter and when she reached them, she couldn't help but join in. Henry was completely covered in bright yellow cheese residue from his mac and cheese. Reid was sitting next to him, eating a small bowl of his own and watching as the toddler continued to get some of the noodles in his mouth and some everywhere else. He turned to look at her when he heard her laugh.

"Hey, hope you don't mind, but he woke up so we decided to get some dinner. Isn't that right, bud?" Henry nodded, shoving some more noodles in his mouth.

"'Pence made mac 'n ceese!" he exclaimed with a smile.

"I see that!" she smiled at her son and then looked at Spence, "thank you."

Reid nodded, offering her a slight smile. He then noticed Henry's empty bowl. "You want some more?" The toddler nodded and handed Reid the bowl. He took the bowl and got up, glancing back at her as he did. "There's plenty left if you want some too."

"Thanks." She walked over to the stove with him and grabbed a bowl from the nearby drier rack. "I'm sorry you had to hear that," she stated in a low voice. "Will and I have been having problems for awhile now."

Reid put a hand on her arm, gently squeezing it. "You don't really owe me an explanation, JJ. But after we get him," he glanced back at Henry, "cleaned up and back to sleep, we should probably talk."

"You don't have to stay to do that," she offered, already feeling like she's imposed on him enough.

Looking her square in the eyes, he whispered, "I want to." With a small smile, he headed back to Henry with his refilled bowl. JJ just watched him walk away, wondering how she got so lucky to have a friend like him.

She also wondered about what he wanted to talk about.

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><p>Author's Note: I hope no one hates me for how that went down with Will. I've never been a big fan of his character, although I'm sure some of that is my bias towards Reid. I wanted to effectively end their relationship, which is clearly stained even on the show. But I also didn't want to make him out to be a real bad guy. I hope I achieved that.<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

JJ slowly closed Henry's door, careful not to make a sound to disturb the sleeping boy. She then turned to face Reid who was leaning against the wall by the door. "Whew, he's finally asleep," she whispered. "I think you wore him out with the tub adventure."

Reid chuckled softly, "I think he wore me out." He glanced down at his shirt and pants that had random wet spots all over. The paired smiled as he made eye contact again before heading downstairs. JJ sat down on her couch in the living room, Reid quickly joining her on the other side. She turned to face him, propping up her head with her hand.

"Seriously, I cannot thank you enough for helping out with him today. It really wasn't necessary."

"No thanks needed, I've missed hanging out with Henry. It's been awhile," he didn't finish the thought, but they both knew what he meant. He hadn't really hung out with them since Emily returned and that all blew up in their faces. "Think of this as part of my apology for how I've treated you lately." JJ nodded slightly. "I'm more than ready to put that all behind us, if you are."

"Oh Spence," she started, taking his hand in her free one and squeezing. "That was behind us when you hugged me at the station a few days ago." They sat like that for a minute before she finally let go of his hand. "Was that what you wanted to talk about?"

Reid cleared his throat, trying to clear his thoughts that started racing when she was holding his hand. "Actually no, it's about earlier today." JJ sighed and started to open her mouth, but he stopped her. "I didn't hear anything specific, just some of the shouting, but that's not wanted to tell you." She looked at him with confusion. "I wasn't the only one that heard."

JJ's eyes widened in horror, "Henry?" she gasped. "I…" The words died on her lips, unable to say her worse fear.

"I was still sitting with him when you two went in your bedroom and he woke up saying he didn't like yelling. I told him that sometimes that happens but that people forgive each other so that it would be okay. Then we went downstairs to eat so I could get him away from it." JJ dropped her head into her hands, a sob escaping. Reid reached over rubbed circles on her back. This wasn't going the way he wanted, but he felt she should know. "I didn't tell you this to purposely upset you, but I thought you should know. I'm sorry."

JJ sat up, resting her head on his shoulder. "It's okay, you were right to tell me. I just always thought we had shielded him from that, but I guess not." She felt his arm wrap around her waist, his hand resting by her hip and she sighed, grateful for the comforting touch. "Well, hopefully given what happened today we can keep that from happening again."

Reid looked down at her, "What do you mean?"

JJ turned, meeting his gaze. Oh how she loved his chocolate brown eyes. She blinked, erasing that thought for a moment. "Will and I broke up."

Those same eyes grew wide in shock. "What? It wasn't because I was here was it? I know he probably wasn't happy with me constantly coming over during those ten weeks after Emily…" He was suddenly pacing in the room, guilt washing over him. "Because I can give you space. I don't have to see Henry as often, I can…" he was rambling and didn't hear her repeating his name until…

"Reid!" That stopped him mid-stride. She hardly ever called him Reid like everyone else. Suddenly she was in front of him, her arms on his shoulders. "You had nothing to do with this." Okay, that was partly a lie, but she also knew that even without her feelings for him, her and Will probably wouldn't have made it anyway. "This has been coming for awhile, neither of us just wanted to face it until now. Okay? And please don't stop coming over, particularly now. Both Henry and I are going to need you."

Reid relaxed ever so slightly; glad to hear he wasn't the cause. He couldn't help but feel guilty though. Maybe Will had picked up on his feelings and just couldn't take it anymore. But for now, if she said that wasn't it, then that was all he could go off of. Then the last few words JJ said finally sunk in. "Of course I'll be here for you, for the both of you." That was all it took for JJ to pull herself into his arms again, needing his comfort. For his part, Reid just took it in stride and held her, much like he had a few days earlier.

It seemed like they stood in the middle of her living room like that, holding each other, for eternity when he finally broke the spell. "So what happens next?"

JJ sighed, turning her head so she could speak while still keeping her head resting on his chest, "I'm not really sure. He said he was going to stay with a friend for a few days and then we'd talk. I just hope we don't get a case before then."

She felt him nod above her and place a kiss on the top of her head, something he had never done before. Even in a moment like this, it made her heart skip a half a beat. "It's going to be okay, Jayje. I promise."

"Thanks." Reid swore it felt like she pulled him even closer to her. They had hugged plenty of times before, but never quite like this or for this long and he had to fight to keep his urges at bay. Not that he ever expected for there to be a moment for them, but it certainly wasn't right after she broke up with Will. "Hey Spence?"

Her voice snapped him back, "Hmm?"

"Can we keep this just between us for now? I don't think I'm ready to handle the questions from the team, particularly Garcia."

Reid chuckled slightly, having been at the other end of Garcia's 20 questions. "Of course. Just remember, that we're all here for you and will help out however we can. Especially me."

JJ pulled back a little so she could plant a light kiss on his cheek and making him blush. "I know, and thank you."

"You're welcome." She finally released him from her grasp. "Well, I should be going."

JJ nodded, walking him to the door. "See you tomorrow." Reid smiled faintly and nodded, waving goodbye. JJ shut and locked the door behind him, leaning against it with a sigh. This day certainly hadn't gone according to plan. She was sure it would take a few days for the repercussions to fully sink in, but right now all she could think about was how good it felt to be in Spence's arms.

As Reid pulled out of JJ's driveway, he was having a hard time focusing. What a weird day. As much as he hadn't cared for Will, he would have never wished this pain on JJ or Henry. All he knew was that he would do his best to be there for them both.

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><p>Thankfully the next few days went by without a case, just stacks of consults and paperwork to go through. Reid was rereading his latest profile for a consult in Montana when he suddenly noticed JJ appear next to his desk.<p>

"Come on Spence, you're taking me out to lunch," she half-teased/half-demanded. Her voice and demeanor seemed light, but only he knew it was a show for Morgan and Prentiss who were at their desks behind him. "Remember, you said you owed me one awhile back." Her eyes looked pleading at him, so he knew something had come up.

"Of course, how could I forget," he smiled back, using his own teasing tone. He stood up, grabbing his coat off the back of his chair.

"Hey, what about us, Pretty Boy?" came Morgan's voice from behind her. He could see JJ tense up, clearly not wanting them to tag along.

"Oh I don't think so, buddy. You see, I don't pay for the lunch of people that sneak their consults on my desk and think I won't notice." He picked up the four consults he knew had been added to his desk when he left to get coffee earlier. He handed two back to Morgan and two back to Prentiss. "No matter how slow you say you read," he added, looking at Morgan. "Or how rusty you say you are." This time Prentiss got the look. "JJ gets lunch because she doesn't cheat, like you two."

JJ smirked and laughed, "That's right. So busted, you two. Let's go Spence." And with that, the pair turned to the exit. Neither of them saw Emily shaking her head and Morgan just grinning, glad to see everything was finally calm for the team.

As they reached the elevators, JJ asked, "had they really put those on your desk or was that just a cover to let us leave alone?"

Reid smiled, pushing the button for the garage. "They had actually done that. Normally, I let it slide, but I figured it would be fun to call them out on it for once." That earned a laugh from JJ as the doors closed, and it was music to his ears.

* * *

><p>"So, I'm assuming you need to talk about Will and were not just trying to get me to buy lunch?" Reid asked after they had placed their orders at the Indian restaurant some 10 minutes away from Quantico.<p>

JJ took a sip from her water and nodded. "He called this morning and wants to meet to discuss things tonight. I'm nervous, I don't want us to get into a fight again."

Reid offered a faint smile. "Well how about letting me take Henry out to dinner? I can get him back for bath and story time so Will has time with him, but it gives you two some alone time to talk as well."

A large smile emerged on JJ's face. "You really are a genius. That would be great." She reached across the table and gently squeezed his hand. The contact made Reid smile in return. They sat like that, holding hands and smiling at each other until the waitress showed up with the food, bringing them back to reality.

Reid let go and cleared his throat, starting to dig into his food. "Do you know what he wants to talk about?"

"Not exactly, but I'm assuming Henry and him moving out. I'm worried he's going to want to go back to New Orleans and take Henry with him." JJ took a bite of her tikka massala, glancing back at her lunch date for his opinion.

Reid pondered for a moment. "I guess I could see him wanting to go home, but I don't see him wanting to pull his child from his mother."

"But what if he does? I know he hates that I went back to the BAU and miss a lot of things with Henry like last week. What if he thinks he's better off raising him alone?" He could hear the panic in her voice starting to rise.

"Then he's an idiot and we won't let him do that. If you're concerned about that then before you let him go anywhere with Henry, you need to get a custody agreement in place." JJ nodded, taking in what he said. "Look, I know you want to keep this quiet it from the team for awhile, but maybe you should talk to Hotch. He was a prosecutor, I would bet he has some lawyer friends he could get you in contact with."

JJ sighed, "You're probably right. I'll see how tonight goes and if I get that feeling from him, then I will." Reid nodded and the two returned to their lunch.

* * *

><p>"You ready?" asked JJ, getting ready to leave that evening. Both ignored the looks from Morgan and Prentiss. Reid nodded, shutting down his computer and gathering his things.<p>

"Night guys," he said to the rest.

"Hey, wait a minute." Both froze at the sound of the quirky tech's voice behind them when they had just about reached the elevators. Turning around, they both tried to look innocent.

"What's up Garcia?" JJ asked.

"Where are you two up to? First I hear from sweetness that you went to lunch together and now you're heading out for the night together?" Garcia crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow.

JJ rolled her eyes, "Okay, first off we're not up to anything. We went out to lunch like we've done all the time. And we're heading out together now because Reid is going to take Henry out to dinner so I can have some alone time with Will." Both watched as Garcia's demeanor changed.

"Oh, date night, huh? Well Aunt Penelope wants in on that. I'll go with you, Reid." There was a slight pause before Reid recovered.

"Sounds good. Go grab your coat and let's go godmother," he smiled, hiding how he really felt. This seriously had the potential to blow JJ's secret.

"Of course, godfather," Garcia teased right back, running off to her office. Reid just glanced at JJ who shrugged as they waited for their friend to join them. Maybe she wouldn't be able to keep this a secret as long as she thought.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Sorry for the delay in posting this. After some reviews about how upset or mad people were about how JJ treated Reid after the Emily debacle (aka during 7x02 "Proof"), I thought about redoing this chapter. After my beta read the redo, she and I agreed we liked my original plan better, which is what you just read. I know some of you really want those two to have it out about that and they will, but I've decided to go with my first idea which is that it the real discussion about EmilyDoyle won't come into play until later. So, you are forewarned that things are going to get better between the pair before that. This is not going to be a story that's all sunshine and roses either, but I'm saving the "talk" about Emily for later (likely around chapter 10 as the rest are already mostly written). I hope you'll stay with me and let it unfold the way I had intended and I hope when it does, you won't be disappointed. Thanks, Ann


	4. Chapter 4

"Where's Henry?" JJ had been sitting on the couch after pouring herself a glass of wine. Reid, Garcia, and Henry had left less than ten minutes ago. Turning toward the front door she saw the father of her child standing there, annoyance on his face. So that's how this night was going to go.

"He's having dinner with his godparents." She rose from her seat, crossing her arms in front of her. "He heard us fighting on Sunday so I didn't want him here for this." She paused, gauging his reaction. His shoulders slumped a bit, feeling guilty. "They are going to have him back in time for bath and story time so you can spend some time with him."

"Oh." He paused for a minute and the pair just stared at each other. "Thanks for that. I've missed him the past few days."

"You're welcome." She headed back to the couch, waiting for him to follow. She heard his bag drop onto the tile entryway and soon he was sitting on the other end of the couch. The middle empty cushion seemed like an ocean between them, he was so distant. "So, you wanted to talk?"

Will nodded. "I haven't changed my mind. This is what's best for all of us." JJ gave a slight nod in agreement. "I was planning on getting some more of my things tonight. I'm going to go home to New Orleans for awhile."

* * *

><p>"Earth to Dr. Reid!"<p>

Reid shook his head and glanced at Garcia, who he guessed by the amused look on her face had been calling him for some time. "Sorry," he smiled sheepishly.

"Where did that giant brain of yours wonder off to?" She had been trying to make some small talk with him while Henry was playing in the ball pit at the restaurant.

"Nothing in particular." He picked up his piece of pizza, taking another bite and hoping she didn't press the issue. Although he could come up with a quick lie, he really didn't like the idea of lying to one of his best friends. Yet he couldn't exactly admit to thinking about how the conversation at JJ's house was going.

Garcia raised an eyebrow, opening her mouth to make a sarcastic comment when he was saved by Henry running back up. "Hey little man, did you have fun?"

"Yeah! More pizza?" he asked, hungry again.

"Sure thing, sweetie." Garcia set him back on his booster seat in the booth and cut up another piece for him. Reid simply took another bite, thankful for the distraction.

* * *

><p>JJ felt her heart start to race, fear sinking in. She swallowed. "What about Henry?"<p>

Will sighed. "A part of me wants to take him with me, but having lost my momma when I was young I can't bare the thought of him not growing up without his mom around."

A sigh of relief escaped her lips. "Thank you for that." There was a pause in the conversation while they let a few things sink in. "Are you going to move back there? I still want you in his life as well."

Will ran his hand through his hair. "Honestly, I'm not sure. I don't have any family there so its not really home, but I never really felt right here either. I'll let you know when I come back in a few weeks. In the mean time, I'll make sure to call everyday and talk with Henry."

JJ nodded, not sure how to respond. A part of her was relieved, but another didn't want her son with an absent father either. Plus, what was she going to do when she has a case?

"I'm going to pack some until Henry gets home." With that, Will left her alone with her thoughts.

"Daddy!" The four adults smiled at the toddler as he charged towards Will after Garcia set him down. "You forgive mommy?" Everyone froze.

"Um, yeah, buddy. Let's go get a bath, okay?" Will answered, recovering quickly. JJ locked eyes with Reid as the father and son climbed the stairs.

"What did he mean?" asked Garcia, walking towards JJ after they heard the bathroom door close. She got partway to JJ when her foot collided with something on the ground. Looking down, she saw 3 pieces of luggage with Will's car keys on top. "Jayje, what happened?"

"Pen…" JJ hesitated. She really didn't want to have this conversation now. "Can we not talk about this now? I promise I will, but right now I just can't." Reid could see tears threatening to fall.

"Garcia, lets go," he chimed in, trying to help.

Garcia spun on her heels. "What? We can't go right now. And why aren't you more surprised? What is going on? Is he leaving? Why? You want me to talk to him?" The questions just flew out of her mouth and she started towards the stairs.

"Garcia, don't." The tech stopped, having never heard JJ use that tone before. She turned to look at one of her best friends, concerned. "Look," JJ's voice softened. "I promise we'll talk. I'm just not up to it tonight, okay?"

Garcia nodded and pulled JJ into a hug. "Okay mama. Please let me know if there is anything I can do."

"I will, thanks Pen." The two pulled apart. "Thank you for taking Henry tonight."

"Anytime sugar." The other two could tell she was trying to be cheerful. "We'll get out of your hair now, come on Reid." She headed out the door first, leaving Reid standing there.

"I'm sorry, JJ. I tried to get her to stay in the car, but she would have none of it."

JJ smiled, "That's okay. See you tomorrow." Reid nodded before shutting the door behind him. Sighing, JJ headed back to her wine glass and couch. Now she had another thing to think about.

* * *

><p>"Wheels up in 30." Hotch stated at the end of the round table meeting. JJ slightly groaned. Of course they would get a case so soon. She had spent the weekend spending one-on-one time with her son, trying to come to terms with being a single parent. She still wasn't sure what she wanted to do about when they had a case and now it has hit her in the face. Will had already left for New Orleans. She hadn't even had a chance to talk to Garcia and now…<p>

The group was starting to get up to head out. All, she noticed, except for Reid. No, he stayed seated, watching her, as if he knew what she was about to do. "Uh, guys, just a second." Everyone turned around. She noticed out of the corner of her eye that Garcia was heading her way.

"JJ, you don't-"

JJ raised her hand, stopping her friend.

"JJ, what's going on?" asked Hotch, she could see the concern on her unit chief's face.

"I um…" She placed her hands on the table, leaning on it. "I wasn't planning on tell you guys this way or even really this soon. I'm still trying to come to terms with it myself. But since we have to go on a case and I'm going to need some help, I don't really have a choice here." She was so focused on getting this out that she hadn't noticed that she was rambling or that Reid was now at her side, at least not until she felt his hand on hers. She turned and looked at him, finding comfort in his soft touch.

"JJ." Morgan's voice brought her back and she stood up, releasing Reid's hand.

"Will and I broke up. He's taking some time away and left for New Orleans." She could hardly look at the expressions on everyone's faces. She had now become another BAU relationship casualty.

Taking a deep breath, she continued. "So I either can't go or need to find someone to watch Henry."

"Done. No worries, peaches," answered Garcia, pulling her into a hug.

"Thanks Pen. Really."

"JJ, I'm so sorry." This time it was Prentiss pulling her into an embrace.

"Thank you, all of you." She made brief eye contact with Reid before looking at the rest. "I wish I could have told you differently. I'm still processing all of this just like you so right now all I would really like to do is do our job so I can come back to my son." Everyone nodded and started to head out, honoring her wish. Garcia stayed back to get her house key and day care information.

JJ watched her leave, and waited, knowing he was still there.

"You okay? I know that's not how you planned."

"I'm fine, I think. And I honestly didn't have a plan. I tried to figure it out over the weekend, but it's a little overwhelming."

Reid chuckled softly, "Yeah, unsubs tend to never work on our schedules, do they?"

JJ laughed and turned to face him, finding him leaning against the doorframe. "I guess not." She headed over to him and as she walked by, he gave her shoulder a slight squeeze. She glanced back, offering a smile in thanks before heading to her office to make some phone calls before getting to the jet.


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey little man, are you behaving for Auntie Pen?" JJ was standing at the rear of the plane. Even though it had been a little over a month, her heart still ached when she had to leave Henry. They had developed a system that when able, Garcia would watch Henry. Otherwise, Jessica had agreed to watch Henry since Jack and him got along so well. This case had only taken three days, but it had been brutal. It was early afternoon so JJ was looking forward being home in time for dinner with her son, to hold him in her arms.

"_Yeah mommy. You come home now?"_ The sound his voice made her smile.

"Yes I am. I'll meet you at my office in a few hours, okay?"

"_K! Can we have mac and cheese?"_

JJ laughed. "Sure buddy."

"_Yay! Can 'Pence come over too?" _JJ shook her head. She loved how close Reid was with her son. They had grown even closer since Will had taken off. Although he did call Henry all the time, he was still in Louisiana. Reid had apparently taken it upon himself to take his place and was often helping out, even during the week. It made her feelings only grow stronger, but she just buried them deeper.

She headed down the aisle and stopped by Reid, who had left a seat open for her. He was reading a book. "I don't know, you want to ask him?"

That got his attention and he looked up at her. JJ handed him the phone with a smile. He raised an eyebrow, but took it anyway. "Hello?"

"_Hi 'Pence! You come over for mac and cheese?"_

JJ felt her heart swell at the smile on his face as she slid into the seat next to him. "Mac and cheese, huh? That sounds yummy. I'd love to come over, Henry. Can we play with your dinosaurs too?" JJ smiled as she heard Morgan and Emily laugh. They were sitting across from her and Reid. Reid just ignored them.

"_Yeah!"_

"Cool. I'll see you in a bit, okay? Let me give you back to your mom." Reid handed the phone back to JJ who quickly wrapped up the conversation. Once he knew the phone was off, he looked at Morgan. "You got a problem with dinosaurs, Derek?

The girls laughed and looked at the senior agent. "With dinosaurs, no. With grown men wanting to play with them, maybe," Morgan teased.

"I think it's sweet," defended Prentiss.

"Yeah, I guess he would relate to Henry the best. After all, he's not that much older," Morgan continued, grinning.

"Does that mean you're old enough to be his grandpa?" Reid quipped right back. Two could play at this game. That got a loud laugh from the whole plane, including Hotch and Rossi. Morgan's mouth hung open, stunned.

"Nice one, Reid!" Prentiss high fived him from across the table. JJ just sat there smiling. It felt good to relax with the group for once. Morgan chose that moment to put his headphones on. Reid went back to reading, resting one hand on the armrest under the table.

A few minutes later, he felt JJ's head gently resting on his shoulder. He smiled softly, but didn't acknowledge it as he continued to read. He had felt closer to JJ these past few weeks than during the past seven plus years. He hoped that could continue, even if they didn't go beyond friendship. All he knew was that he loved her and Henry and that he would do anything for either of them. Even eat more mac and cheese then is good for anyone.

* * *

><p>Reid softly closed Henry's door behind JJ after getting the youngster asleep. "Thanks for dinner." JJ chuckled softly.<p>

"If you want to call mac and cheese a dinner. Sometimes I forget what grown up food is like." The pair smiled at each other only to be interrupted by a loud clap of thunder and some light flashing through the front windows.

Reid frowned. "I better get home before it gets any worse." JJ nodded and followed him to the front door. It was then that they heard what sounded like pebbles hitting the windows. JJ pushed back a curtain and saw the hail first. It wasn't very large, but enough to make the roads not safe.

"Actually I think you better spend the night here." When she turned to look at him, she couldn't help but laugh at his 'deer in the headlights' expression. "Its not safe to drive. You can stay in the guest bedroom."

Reid seemed to ponder it for a moment, "If you're sure."

"Of course I'm sure."

Reid nodded, finally agreeing. "Good."

* * *

><p>JJ woke to the sounds of whimpers. Frowning, she glanced at her alarm clock: Three in the morning. Henry hadn't had a nightmare in a really long time and usually he woke her up by appearing next to her bed. Yawning, she climbed out bed and quietly headed out into the hall. It was then that she realized the sounds weren't coming from her son's room. Her frown deepened when she realized it was Spence. Hesitantly, she headed over to the guest room. A part of her didn't want to invade his privacy; another was concerned for her friend. As she got closer, she could make out the words he was saying.<p>

"No…"

"But you lied…" JJ froze. This wasn't about her, was it? Was she causing him nightmares?

"Give it to me." JJ started to move again as his voice was getting louder and she was now concerned he'd wake Henry as well.

"You're just like everyone else." JJ quietly pushed the door open and closed it behind her. She took a deep breath, hoping he didn't hate her for checking on him. She turned to face him, slowly making her way to the edge of the bed. She hardly let herself process the fact that he was only in his boxers, the sheets barely draped over him as he tossed and turned.

Suddenly he jumped up in bed. "Why JJ…" This came out in a whisper but she heard it loud and clear. So she was the cause. A part of her wanted to run and hide in shame, but she needed to be strong to help him.

She gently reached out and touched his arm. In his scared, surprised state, he jerked hard enough to cause her to stumble and sit down on the bed. Stunned, she didn't have a chance to open her mouth before he fully woke up. She saw his eyes scan the room quickly before settling on her. "JJ, what?" He wasn't coherent enough to get anymore out.

"I'm sorry if I startled you. I heard you from my room and thought it was Henry. When I realized it was you, I wanted to see if you were okay." She looked down because she knew he wasn't. And she was the cause. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Reid watched her for a minute, trying to distinct her from the dream version he was just arguing with because she wouldn't give him dilaudid. He could tell by her body language that he must have said something in his sleep about her. "Are you sure you want to hear it if I do?"

She looked up, finally meeting his eyes. "Want to? Probably not. Need to? Yes." She paused and the pair studied each other for a minute. "I don't want to be the cause of your nightmares, Spence. Please let me do something to change that."

Reid sighed, running a hand though his sleep tussled curls. "Do you remember what I said to you right after you told us Emily was dead?"

JJ nodded. "That you never got to say goodbye." He stared at her, letting that sink in. Then it hit her like a ton of bricks. How had she not seen this before? "Just like…"

He nodded. "Like my dad, Elle, Gideon. Emily was just another one to add to my growing list of people who abandoned me. During the grieving process, I was starting to accept that she didn't leave on purpose like the others."

JJ blinked back tears. "Then you found out she actually did. And I helped her do that."

"When you grow up like I did, you don't trust many people. But I trust this team, I trusted you. The logical part of my brain understands why you did what you did, but did my crying for ten weeks even make you think about telling me the truth?"

So much for stopping the tears. "Every time, Spence. It was on the tip of my tongue every time. But I always wondered if I did, would it get her killed for real? I…I just didn't know what to do."

Reid looked away; he could never handle seeing JJ cry. However, he needed to get this all out and he couldn't do that if he had to see her so sad so he stood up and looked out the window. "Do you remember the question I asked you in Oklahoma?" He heard a soft yes behind him. "I need to know, would you have told me the truth if I had started using again?"

There was a pause. "I would like to say yes, but I don't know if I can honestly answer that. I'm not sure if I would have noticed you were, at least not right away, you hide things so well. Would you have told me if you did?"

Reid frowned, he hadn't thought about that. "I don't know." He heard the bed sheets rumble as she stood up and was soon beside him. She took a hold of his hand and stood in front of him, tear stains down her cheeks.

"How-" She paused as her voice cracked. "How close were you?" Her blue eyes stared into his and he knew she needed to hear the truth.

"One day after I left here I found myself wandering around downtown hoping to find a score. I was so determined to find a way to make the pain go away. Then I found myself in front of a theater were Em and I would go watch sci-fi movies and I realized she wouldn't want me to flush three years of sobriety away. If I hadn't ended up there…"

JJ pulled him into a hug, holding him so close he could feel the tears on his bare chest. A few of his own tears escaped at that moment as well. "Oh Spence, I am so sorry for everything. I'm sorry for lying about Emily, I'm sorry for keeping it a secret, I'm sorry for being so defensive at that station when you had every right to be mad at me. I wish I could go back and do something different. Despite of all that, here you are being such a good friend to me and helping out after Will left…I don't deserve your friendship." JJ was almost sobbing at this point, her guilt over everything finally pouring out.

Reid sighed as he rubbed small circles on her back. This wasn't going right. He had wanted to have this conversation for a long time, but he never meant for JJ to doubt their relationship. He just wanted her to understand how now that Emily was back, that didn't erase the pain he went through. "JJ, that's not true. Yes, we went though a rough stretch that will take some time to fully heal. That doesn't erase the past. You were there for me for so much…after Tobias, after Gideon left, after Riley Jenkins. This past year doesn't change that…it just might take some time to get us fully back to before."

He lifted her head with his finger and rubbed her tears away with his thumbs. "Please don't think you're not my friend." JJ smiled softly and hugged him again.

"I really am sorry Spence."

Reid nodded. "I know. I'm okay now. Well, not exactly okay but getting better."

"Will we ever be okay? Back to where we were before?" She heart was breaking at the thought of losing the man she loved from her life.

Reid nodded. "We'll get there." They stood there for a moment, collecting their thoughts. Reid was first to notice his state of undress and that JJ was pressed against him. He pulled back gently, trying to keep his body from reacting. "Well, um, we should probably get some more sleep. Thanks for checking on me."

JJ nodded. "Sleep well, Spence."

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Okay, so I changed my mind and moved the "Emily" talk to a little earlier. I hope you liked how it played out. It likely won't be the last time its mentioned, but that's the big conversation. Anyway, let me know what you think and please review, I live for reviews! Also, that's to all that have added this to their favorites or alerts!<p> 


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Note: I'm glad to see the last chapter was well received, I was worried about it. I just wanted to quickly mention you'll be getting a few updates in short amount of time here because I have Christmas themed chapter coming up. After that, there will likely be a brief break in updates because I want cases to incorporate and we haven't had many new episodes yet. The case referenced in this chapter is just a made-up one. Anyway, thanks again for sticking with me!

* * *

><p>"Are you sure?" JJ asked for the third time.<p>

Reid rolled his eyes, pushing her into her bedroom. "For the third time, yes. I've got Henry under control. Go take a bath and relax already." Reid pulled the door behind him shut before she could protest. JJ smiled at the closed door; he was just too sweet sometimes. It had been a week since the talk about Emily. Once they woke up that morning and smiled at each other over morning coffee while Henry got cheerios stuck all over his face, they silently put it behind them. So here he was forcing her to take some time to herself because he could tell on the plane that this case had gotten to her.

She quietly undressed as the tub was filling with water. Finally she slipped into the hot soapy water and moaned at the feeling of her aches starting to melt away. If only it was that easy to melt away her emotional aches and pains. How this last unsub thought it would be a good idea to take mothers away from their young children… The thoughts of leaving Henry made tears stream down her face. She couldn't even imagine. Yes, he could go be with Will but now that would also be pulling him away from his extended family with her team, particularly Pen and Spence.

She still couldn't believe that Will had decided to stay in New Orleans, at least for now. In their last conversation he said he was taking an extended leave from his job and was going to spend more time in his hometown. He wanted Henry to come spend some time with him during the holidays. That led to an argument, where he ultimately agreed to let her get custody agreement papers drawn up. She still needed to talk to Hotch about that…

A soft knock startled her out of her thoughts. "JJ? You okay in there? It's been over an hour."

JJ then realized that her water was now cold. "Um, yeah. I'll be out in a minute." She quickly climbed out of the tub and dried off while the water drained. After throwing on her pajamas and a robe, she opened the door to find Reid sitting on the edge of her bed.

"You okay?" she could hear the concern in his voice and smiled softly.

"I will be. I was just thinking about the case. And Will." She pushed some of her hair behind her ear. Reid stood up and pulled her into a hug.

"Everything is going to work out fine, JJ. Hotch will make sure of it." He was the only one she had confided to about her last conversation with her ex. JJ sighed softly, trying to pull strength from her best friend's embrace.

"Thanks Spence, for everything. You have been my rock during all of this. I don't know what I would have done without you." She felt Reid rub circles in the small of her back.

"You don't even have to think about that. I'll be here through thick and thin." She looked up at him and stood on her tiptoes, intending to kiss him on the cheek. Only he didn't know that's what she was going to do and turned, causing her to catch half his mouth. The pair paused, both stunned by the contact.

She was the first to recover. "Oops, sorry. My aim was a little off." She smiled, trying to shrug it off even though her heart was racing.

"It…it's okay," he stammered. He released his embrace. "Henry went down about 20 minutes ago so I should get going." JJ nodded.

"Good night."

Reid turned to face her from her bedroom door. "Night JJ."

* * *

><p>"Garcia, you wanted to see me?" Reid asked, walking into the tech goddess's office. His brightly colored friend spun around in her chair.<p>

"Have a seat, Junior G-Man," she smiled.

Reid raised an eyebrow, "why do I feel like I just got called into the principal's office?" Had JJ told her about their almost kiss? He took a seat, taking a sip of coffee as Garcia laughed.

"You're not in trouble." She paused, studying him. "Should you be?"

Reid choked on his coffee, coughing. "Um, no?" he replied, still coughing.

Garcia smirked, so something had happened. She had noticed that the dynamic between JJ and him seemed ever so slightly off today. Nothing to alarm her and it went unnoticed by the rest, but it was kicking her curiosity into overdrive. She knew Reid would be the weaker link out of the two.

"What happened between you and JJ?" she asked, watching as he paused from taking another sip, his cup a few inches from his mouth.

He set it down, swallowing. "What do you mean?"

Garcia wheeled her chair closer. "Please, Reid, I may not be a profiler like the rest of you, but I know you. Did something happen? You two seem…off."

Reid sighed. "Do you think the rest noticed?" Garcia shook her head no. "Good. It's really nothing. Last night after the case, I knew she was stressed so I told her to take a bath while I put Henry to bed."

"Aww," Garcia replied, unable to stop herself.

"After she finished, the case was still bothering her so I offered her a hug. She was thanking me for my help and…"

"And…what? You're killing me here."

Reid took a deep breath. "I guess she was leaning up to kiss me on the cheek, but I didn't realize it so…she kinda kissed half my mouth." He looked down at his hands, embarrassed.

Garcia smiled softly. That would throw them both off a bit. Reid had confided in her when JJ was pregnant how he felt about her, about how he had screwed up any chance with her. She had comforted him and kept his secret, even when she knew a part of him was dying after Henry was born, after JJ left the team, after Emily…

"Do you think it meant anything?" she asked softly. Reid looked up and shook his head.

"I think it was just a mistake and we'll get past it. I've just been replaying it in my mind and it stirred up old feelings."

Garcia took his hand in hers, and squeezed softly. "You mean constant feelings?" His down cast eyes answered the question. "Oh baby. You know, if helping JJ out as much as you are is painful, no one would think anything else of you if you took a step back. I can help out more. I know Em is willing to help out more too."

Reid sighed, "I think I'll be okay. Just need a little time to recover. Besides, I love Henry too much to not be there for him." Garcia nodded, letting go of his hand.

"If you're sure." Reid nodded. "Okay, then I release you my love." A small smile appeared on his face as he headed out, shutting the door behind him. Garcia sighed. A part of her wondered about JJ's feelings towards Reid. She had never pressed the issue because, obviously, she had Will. But a part of her always wondered. There was a look in her blond friend's eyes that seemed to be reserved just for him. She just never could tell if it was romantic in nature or just brotherly love.

She really hoped it was the former because those two really deserved each other and deserved some happiness.

* * *

><p>A gunshot rang out.<p>

"Reid!"

For 30 agonizing seconds, JJ thought she had lost him. It wasn't until she saw Brian Kemp, their unsub, slump over and Reid push the now dead body off of him and sit up from the muddy ground did her heart start to beat again.

She watched, frozen, as Morgan ran over to him and helped him up. Why was he always a magnet for trouble? They had identified their killer and went to his place. Apparently he had seen them coming and charged at Reid, who was covering the back door. Under normal circumstances, it probably would have worked out fine, but it had just rained the night before and caused them to slip in the mud, with Kemp falling on top of Reid. The pair fought over Reid's gun and thankfully he won. But that didn't stop the fear from sinking in.

She was finally able to move and walked towards him. "Spence, are you okay?"

He looked up from trying to wipe some of the mud off of him to see the fear in her eyes. "Yeah, I'm fine, JJ." He stretched out his arms and quickly found her there. "I'm going to get you covered in mud," he murmured, trying to lighten the mood.

She did chuckle softly, "I don't care. How do you always end up in harms way?"

He sighed, "I wish I knew." Finally, she pulled away and without a word, headed back to their waiting SUVs. It wouldn't be until later, when she was alone in her hotel room, would some relief finally wash over her that he was indeed alive. It would also be when she decided she couldn't keep her feelings inside anymore.


	7. Chapter 7

JJ sat curled up on her couch, wine in hand. She had turned on a radio and was listening to the soft music play when she finally heard footsteps distending the staircase.

"He's finally down." She looked up at Reid as he joined her on the couch, collecting his wine from the end table in the process.

"Sometimes I wonder if you are really reading him a story and putting him to bed or if you two are playing first. It seems to take you awhile," she teased. He had sat closer than she expected so she stretched out her legs to lie on top of his, being a little bold. It surprised her when not only did he not try to move away but actually rested a hand on her knees.

"He usually talks me into reading two stories. I just can't say no to him." He took a sip of his wine and smiled when JJ laughed. It was one of his favorite sounds. While spending more time with JJ, he felt his trust in her being rebuilt. He also had become increasingly more comfortable with contact. Which was likely why he didn't notice his thumb was running circles on her knee. She noticed, however, and her heart was starting to race.

Ever since the 'almost kiss' a few weeks ago, her thoughts couldn't stop wondering to 'what if.' She had finally felt like they were back to where they were before she was forced to leave the BAU and it gave her hope. Add in his close call a few days ago, she had decided she could no longer not take the risk. She was just waiting for the opportunity.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, simply enjoying each other's company, when JJ recognized the soft melody coming from the radio and smiled. Here was her chance. She slid her legs off his and set down her wine. "Dance with me Spence?" she asked, standing and extending her hand to him.

"I, um, sure," he stammered, surprised. He set down his glass and took her hand.

_Lyin' here with you so close to me  
>It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe<em>

JJ wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her head on his shoulder. She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing as it took him a second to finally place his hands on her hips.

_I've never opened up to anyone  
>So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms<br>_

Reid felt his pulse speed up and he was fairly certain she was going to cause his cardiac arrest. He felt her body sway against his and tried to match it. Glancing down, he noticed her eyes were closed and she was softly singing along. She was enjoying herself so it was time for him to try. He closed his eyes, and for the first time he listened to the words.

_No I don't want to mess this thing up  
>I don't want to push too far<br>_

JJ had never realized how well the song fit them until now. Without thinking, she started to sing along. "It's never felt so real, no it's never felt so right…"

She didn't, did she? Reid's mind started to race. Could she really be feeling what he was feeling? What he had been feeling for years?

_Just a shot in the dark that you just might  
>Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life<br>So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight  
><em>

JJ put one of her hands on his heart, feeling it beat fast. Here was her chance. With a prayer, she looked up only to find his eyes watching her. Both noticed the love and passion reflected back at them. "Spence…" her voice came out so soft, he hardly heard her. With courage he never thought he had, he took one of his hands and gently stroked her cheek.

"Jayje…" he whispered back, leaning in for a kiss. It was a soft, tender kiss, but it was full of promise and hope.

_Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight  
>Just a touch of the fire burning so bright<br>_

His brain finally connected what he was doing. He pulled back, resting his forehead on hers. "Are you sure, JJ? This isn't some kind of reaction to me being around more now that Will is gone? Because we can pretend this didn't happen…" he rambled, assuming the worst.

"Spence, I've never been more sure of anything in my life." She took his hands in hers and pulled him back to the couch. "The night Will left, you asked if you caused it and I told you no, but that wasn't exactly the truth." She felt him stiffen and knew she needed to get this out quickly before he freaked out. "Will and I had several problems that caused our relationship to end. One of them being that he knew I was in love with someone else." She scooted closer to him so their faces just inches apart. "You."

The smile that quickly appeared on his face made her heart soar. "I love you too." JJ barely had a chance to smile before his lips were on hers again. The kiss soon turned passionate, with JJ running her tongue against his lips, begging for entrance. Reid quickly obliged and reciprocated. He sat back on the couch, pulling her into his lap. It wasn't until they finally pulled apart for air that JJ even noticed her new location.

"Wow," JJ whispered, breathing quite hard.

Reid ran a hand through her silky blond hair. "Agreed."

She leaned into his touch, hardly believing they were really – finally – here. "I've dreamed of kissing you for so long, but all of them pale in comparison to what we just did." She smiled as blush crept on his face, still a little bashful.

"Um, thanks?" he replied, not sure what to say.

JJ laughed as she closed the gap between them once more. This time it was a little slower as both tried to savor finally sharing their long suppressed feelings for each other. It seemed like forever as they sat on that couch behaving like teenagers. Finally, Reid pulled back from their last kiss. "As amazing as this is, it's getting late. I, um, should probably go."

JJ frowned. "You don't want to…" she didn't get to finish the question because he placed a soft kiss on her lips.

"You have no idea how much I want to, JJ. But, I also don't want to rush this. We've taken this long to get here, I don't want to ruin it by going too fast." JJ felt her eyes moisten; he was just perfect. She remembered one of her first real dates with Will; he seemed to be making his mission to get her into bed. Not her Spence.

"You're right, of course," she teased, kissing him once more before climbing off of his lap. Both bit back a groan at the lost of physical contact. She took his hand, pulling him off the couch and escorting him to the front door. She pulled him close once more, resting her hands on his chest. She noticed he was far less uncomfortable as he placed his hands on her hips. "Love you." They pair smiled. "God it feels good to finally say that."

Reid chuckled, "Yes it does. I love you too." The pair shared one last soft kiss. "Good night, JJ. I'll see you in the morning."

JJ nodded, letting him go. "Sweet dreams."

"Oh I can guarantee that they will be," he teased as he closed the door behind him. JJ sighed happily, leaning against the door after locking it. Sweet dreams, indeed.

_So baby I'm alright, oh, let's do this right, with just a kiss goodnight_

* * *

><p>Author's Note: That's right, I did that. One, I know some of you probably think its too soon but there is a plan, trust me. Remember I said better before worse? Two, I know I had a penchant to stick songs into stories (a la Sarah Riverson and Michelle Stratford series), but that is not my intention with this story. I just heard this song and it seemed to fit so well. The song is "Just a Kiss" by Lady Antebellum. Hope you like it and stick with me.<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

"You both agree to Ms. Jareau being the primary caretaker. Until Henry reaches school age, the two of you can arrange extended periods of time for Henry to be with Mr. LaMontagne in New Orleans. Once he is five years old, he will permanently reside with his mother and have scheduled trips with his father. However, if either parent wants to take him out of the state in which they reside, the other parent must give consent. Agreed?"

JJ nodded, "Yes." Will verbally agreed over the speakerphone. They were finalizing the custody agreement. Hotch had gotten her in touch with one of his good friends that specialized in this area.

"Good. Now, should Mr. LaMontagne decide to move back to Virginia, we can revisit the idea of joint custody. I will have Ms. Jareau sign the paperwork here and then we will send them to you."

"_Okay_." Will hung up. JJ sighed and took the paperwork from Mr. Cook. She quickly signed the papers and handed them back.

"Thank you." Mr. Cook nodded in reply and she quietly exited his office, holding back some tears. As happy as she was with Spence, their relationship changing into what she had always dreamed, her heart still ached. She was glad that they were getting this settled, but it pained her to have to draw up paperwork for Will to spend time with their son. Once he had signed it and it was notarized, JJ was to send Henry to Louisiana for a few weeks. She would get him back the day after Christmas, but that didn't make this any easier. Why was he staying so far away?

Before she knew it, she was setting her things down in her office. Sighing, she tried to gather herself. A soft knock on her door caused her to push those thoughts away.

"Hey." She physically relaxed when she recognized his voice. She turned to face him, trying and failing to put on a happy face. He frowned, "was it that bad?" He shut the door behind him.

"Not really. He agreed to everything. It just makes me sad that it was even needed." He walked over to her and she fell into his arms.

"I know, but it's just to protect you and Henry." They stood in silence for a minute as she took comfort from his embrace. "As nice as this is, I actually came to get you. We have a case."

JJ groaned, "Of course we do."

* * *

><p>Reid gently placed a blanket over JJ's sleeping form on the jet's couch before heading back to his seat. Morgan was across from him, sleeping with his headphones on. Hotch was in his usual corner seat, looking over another file. Rossi was across from the unit chief, reading. He picked up his own book when suddenly Emily placed a hand on it, stopping him. He made eye contact with her, sending a questioning look.<p>

"Hey."

He studied his friend, finally starting to feel like he could call her that again. "Hey…"

"How are you doing, Reid?" Reid blinked, not sure where this question was going. Had she picked up on the change between JJ and him? They weren't ready for the group to know just yet.

"I'm fine, Em. Is something on your mind?"

"I was just thinking. I know we've moved past everything, at least I think we have..." Reid nodded in agreement. The pain of everything starting to fade away. As upset as he was about the lies, it was hard for him to not just be happy to have her back in his life. She continued, "but we haven't really talked recently. I know you've been helping JJ out a lot lately, which I think it great. I just wanted to see how you've been." He noticed something in her tone and everything clicked; the headaches.

"I'm better." He paused, studying Morgan for a second, confirming he was asleep even though he was the only other member of the team that knew. He still hadn't told JJ. "I still have them, but not as often. They seem to have improved after you came back." Emily nodded, a touch of a smile on her face. She had worried her departure would cause his condition, whatever it may be, to worsen. It was a large part of what caused her ulcer, she just couldn't bring herself to tell him that.

"I'm sorry if my…death…made them worse, but I'm glad they are better." He smiled back.

"Thanks." There was a pause and he couldn't decide if she was done or not.

"So, how is JJ doing? I'm glad you two have moved past everything. I'm sure she appreciates the help with Henry."

"She's hanging in there," he answered. He knew JJ had updated the girls about everything with Will. "She has to send Henry to New Orleans when we get back, so that's going to be rough."

Emily nodded. "Yeah. Maybe Garcia and I should take her out for a girls night soon, we haven't done that in awhile. Maybe find her some hot guy as a nice distraction." She smiled, remembering how she used to be the one the others were always trying to set up on their nights out. She was so focused on her own thoughts that she missed the grimace that briefly covered Reid's face.

"I'm sure she'd love a girls night out." He tried to keep his annoyance out of his voice. He took that opportunity to open his book and Emily let him end the conversation, satisfied with his answers. He was going to have to make a mental note forewarn JJ about what was to come.

* * *

><p>JJ couldn't help but laugh at her friends. Emily and Pen were continuing to point out different hot guys at the bar, trying to get her to go for them. She was trying to feign not being interested in dating yet, without giving away her real reason.<p>

"Oh oh, how about him? He's got a mysterious vibe going." Garcia was eying a guy a few tables over from them.

JJ rolled her eyes. "Cause that's what I'm looking for." Emily laughed. "Seriously you two, I'm not going home with any of these guys so you can just stop trying." She had one that was planning on meeting her there.

"You sure? Nothing like getting back on the horse." Emily and JJ exchanged a look before staring back at their friend. She did not just say that.

"Okay, Garcia, we need to cut you off." Emily moved Garcia's drink away from her. "We'll stop, JJ. We just want you to be happy."

JJ smiled. "Thanks. I am, really. It's hard being a single parent since Will moved but with everyone's help I'm making it work. As much as I miss having Will around to help with things that relationship wasn't working and prolonging it would have only made things worse. It was honestly for the best." Her friends nodded.

Garcia raised her glass and the others followed. "To new beginnings and second chances." They clinked their drinks together and JJ smiled. If only her friend knew how true that statement was.

* * *

><p>JJ locked the front door behind her and set down her purse. She slipped out of her heels and was taking off her coat when she heard him on the stairs.<p>

"What, you didn't find anyone to bring home with you?" She smiled at the teasing tone with just a hint of jealousy.

Turning around, she took a moment to soak him in. He was still in his work slacks and shirt, but he had removed the tie and his shirt was un-tucked and partially unbuttoned. She tossed her jacket and quickly made her way to him. "Nope. I couldn't find any hot geniuses with magic hands. I think my type is too specific."

"There are very few of us out there," he joked back as she reached him.

"Too bad for the rest of the world." Her voice got husky with lust, tugging on his shirt and bringing his lips to hers. Their tongues battled for dominance a little as he pulled her to him, his hands running down her backside. She moaned at the touch before they pulled apart to breathe.

"Are you sure?" he breathed. JJ nodded. They both knew what tonight was, they had been leading up to it for the past few weeks but cases got in the way and then she had to see Henry off. Yet, here he was giving her the choice. She loved that about him. However, she didn't think she would wait much longer. Over seven years as a long time.

"Spence, if you don't take me into that bedroom, I'm sure I can think of a way to kill you." A throaty chuckle escaped his mouth as he bent down, kissing her neck. He ran his hands down her sides before grabbing her hands and leading her up the stairs and to her bedroom door. He moved behind her as he pushed the door open. She gasped as her eyes took in the numerous lit candles and rose petals scattered around the room. "Oh Spence."

"I wanted tonight to be special," he whispered behind her.

She turned and kissed him softly. "Just being with you makes it special, but this is certainly a nice touch." She slid her hands down his exposed upper chest and then made quick work of the remainder of his buttons. He moaned as she ran her hands up and down his chest and she took in this new view of him. She placed soft kisses on his chest. She was so focused on feeling his skin on her lips, she didn't even notice he had unzipped her dress until it was falling off her shoulders.

She looked up at him to see a smirk on his face. "Magic hands, remember?" She laughed and let it fall off her. She watched as the smirk quickly left his face and the look of desire replaced it as his eyes moved up her body. She felt herself blush and get turned on even more with that look. "You're so beautiful." She smiled and stepped closer, pulling him into another kiss.

They were soon lying on the bed, skin against skin, and his lips were making their way down her body leaving a trail of fire in their wake. "Spence," she breathed. "I need you." He was quick to oblige. When their bodies were joined and the pair stared into each other eyes, it was as if time stood still.


	9. Chapter 9

As JJ started to wake up the first thing she noticed was the warmth from the body next to her. She had curled up into his side and never felt so safe. She couldn't stop the grin that appeared on her face. A part of her could not believe she was waking up next to Spence. _Her_ Spence…finally. A hand sliding down her side reminded her it was real, very real.

"Morning." His hand continued to roam her body, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

"Good morning," she breathed, hardly able to focus as his hand continued to move lower. He turned her so she was on her back and he was on top of her. That was when she realized just how good of a morning it really was. He kissed her softly, lovingly, before starting to move down her body. "Spence…" She couldn't believe how insatiable he was. Not that she was complaining. "Oh god," she groaned. He really did have magic hands.

* * *

><p>"Damn, Reid, did you get any sleep last night? I'm getting tired just looking at you." JJ had to bite the inside of her lip to keep from laughing at Morgan's comment. She had noticed Reid get another cup of coffee as she was leaving her office to drop off her completed consults to Hotch. She was just as tired after their busy night and morning but after sleeping odd hours when Henry was born, she had gotten used to it.<p>

"Apparently us girls weren't the only ones with the late night," joined in Emily. _This could be fun_, JJ thought and decided to walk through the bullpen.

"Ooh, did someone have a hot date last night, Spence?" she teased.

Reid smirked. "With a very interesting research article about the mating habits of blonde capuchin monkeys, actually. Did Garcia find you anyone last night?" JJ's mouth fell open a little; he did not just say that. He was going to get it later.

"I almost forgot about that," replied Morgan, turning his attention to something more interesting. "You find a little honey last night?" Emily just shook her head. She had really missed this while being away.

"Well," JJ started. "I think there was some honey in my drink last night." She smiled sweetly, acting innocent. Morgan just chuckled. "You guys still in for a Christmas dinner next week?" She had decided to have a group dinner with her extended family after Henry came home. Her brother and his wife and kids were going to spend the holiday with his wife's family this year. She wanted Henry to be surrounded by love and she could think of no way better than with her BAU family.

"Sure thing." Morgan answered.

"Wouldn't miss it," added Emily. Reid nodded.

"Great." JJ headed back to her office, excited about what was to come. Plus she needed to think about how to get back at Spence for that monkey comment.

* * *

><p>"Mmm, this is nice," JJ murmured. She was curled up against Reid's side, stretched out on the couch and watching <em>A Christmas Story<em> on TV. They had finished decorating the house and the food prep for the next day. Henry would be picked up in the morning before the group descended on them later in the afternoon. So this would be their last bit of alone time for a while.

"Yes it is." She felt him kiss her forehead as his fingers played with her hair. She was about to close her eyes when a small red jewelry box with a gold bow appeared in front of her. "Merry Christmas JJ."

She smiled and propped herself up on her side. She opened the box and gasped. "Spence, its beautiful." She ran her fingertips over the infinity loop necklace covered in hers and Henry's birthstones. "I love it, thank you." She leaned in and gave him a long kiss.

"I'm glad you like it." He replied when they pulled apart.

"Help me put it on?" she asked, sitting up. He quickly obliged, clasping the silver chain behind her neck. "Let me grab yours." She hurried over to the tree and grabbed a small black box before returning to the couch and handing it to him. "Merry Christmas Spence."

He smiled as he pulled of the lid, revealing a new gold pocket watch. "Wow, JJ." He pulled it out of the box and opened it, finding a picture of Henry and himself reading with the words "Love, Henry."

"I asked Henry what we should get you and apparently he decided you needed a new watch. I saw this one and it spoke to me." Reid smiled at her explanation. "Check out this hidden part." She pushed two buttons that didn't look like did anything and it revealed another spot for a photo. This one was of the two of them from a few weeks ago that she has sweet-talked him into taking, the words "Finally…Love, JJ."

Reid's smile grew even wider. "Nicely said." He pulled her into a kiss. "Thank you. Remind me to thank Henry tomorrow." JJ nodded before kissing him again. The pair quickly forgot about poor Ralphie on the TV.

* * *

><p>JJ stood nervously by the baggage claim area waiting for Henry and Will to arrive. Will was flying back so Henry wasn't on the plane alone, which was why she decided to have Reid stay home. She didn't want to make things more awkward than they already were and she knew Will would be able to sense the change in her relationship with her teammate.<p>

"Mommy!" The sound of Henry's voice snapped her back to the present and she saw him running towards her. She quickly bent down to scoop him up her arms.

"Hey little man, I've missed you so much!" She hugged him tight, placing a kiss on the top of his head.

"I miss you too." She held him for a minute more before putting him down.

"Did you have a fun time with daddy?" Henry nodded. "Good." JJ was so focused her son that she hardly noticed Will standing nearby or that he wasn't alone.

"Hey JJ." She looked up to see her ex standing with a petite brunette.

"Hi Will." Her eyes shifted between the pair in front of her. So this was why he was staying in New Orleans?

"I, um, would like you to meet Jackie." The brunette stuck out her hand and JJ shook it politely, keeping a smile on her face. "We were high school sweethearts back in the day. The first week I was back home, we ran into each other and it turns out we still had those same feelings."

"Its really nice to meet you, JJ. Henry is a great kid."

JJ forced her smile even bigger. "Thank you. It's nice to meet you too. That's so great that you two found each other again after all these years. I'm really happy for you." In truth, she really was, but she still felt a small pang of loss. She also wasn't happy that Will so quickly introduced her to Henry, but this wasn't the time. "So are you two planning on staying here for a while?"

"Just for a few days, maybe a week. I have some things to take care of up here, including getting the rest of my stuff." There was a pause and JJ nodded, expecting that. "Plus I wanted to see Henry a little more before heading back."

"Mommy, can we go?" JJ bit back a laugh, grateful for her son's impatience.

She looked down at the little blond boy, "We sure can buddy. Everyone is going to be coming over soon too." She took his hand and the luggage from Will. "Just let me know when you need to stop by. The team is on stand down until after New Years." Will nodded. "Say goodbye to daddy, Henry."

"Bye!" Henry waved and then started to pull her away. She smiled again and they nodded before she turned and headed towards the parking garage. A sigh escaped her mouth. Well, at least he had moved on as well.

* * *

><p>Morgan shook his head at the sight before him. He worked with some of the best minds law enforcement had to offer and here they were playing with toys with two little boys. Even Hotch was on the ground, laughing and playing with Jack.<p>

"Thinking about joining them?" He turned to find JJ reclining on the stairs, a cup of coffee in her hands.

"Nah. It is pretty funny to see though." He took a seat next to her.

"That's why I've already taken some photos."

Morgan laughed. "I see you've taken some pretty nice ones." He gestured to the frames hanging off the wall by the staircase they were sitting on. He had noticed one of the team at Rossi's a few months ago, along with several shots of Henry, some with JJ and others with his godparents. None of Will. Clearly, she had moved on.

JJ smiled, glancing up at her favorite of Henry sleeping on Spence's chest one afternoon. "I try. After everything with Emily, I decided I wanted to capture as many of the good moments as I can."

Morgan clanked his coffee cup to hers. "I hear that." The pair sat in comfortable silence for a moment. "So how are you doing, JJ? Anything I can do for you?"

"I'm good, Derek, really." She smiled. "It's actually not been as hard of a transition as I would have thought. Pen and Spence have been great at helping out. The rest of you too."

Morgan followed her eyes, which were on the group playing. Reid was currently being tackled by the kids…and Garcia. "Yeah, who knew Reid would turn out to be so great with kids? The 'Reid effect' must have worn off."

JJ laughed. "It still applies to dogs. We were at the park one day and I swear every dog barked at him when we walked by." Morgan chuckled and shook his head. JJ studied him, by his body language he almost appeared guilty for not helping as much as the others. That wouldn't do. "There is one thing you can do for me, though."

Morgan turned to her, "name it."

"Can you fix the leaky faucet upstairs? Spence may be good at a lot of things, but plumbing is apparently not one of them." Morgan grinned and nodded. Just then, four small hands started to pull on Morgan's pants.

"Come play." Henry pleaded.

"Yeah, come play Uncle Morgan," added Jack.

He glanced at JJ, who took his mug from him. "I think you've been summoned."

"Okay, okay, I give." He stood up and let the kids lead him away. JJ smiled as she watched her son and his extended family play on her living room floor.

"Pie?" She glanced up to see Reid standing there with two slices of pie, pumpkin and cherry.

"You read my mind, Spence," she stated, taking the cherry slice.

"How are you doing? We didn't really get to talk about what happened at the airport." He sent her a sideways glance, gauging her reaction.

JJ sighed. "A very small part of me was hurt that he had moved on so quickly, but I can't fault him for that given…" She didn't finish hat statement but he knew what she meant. "I just wasn't expecting it, but I'm happy for him. He deserves it too." She felt Reid give her thigh a quick squeeze before pulling back, not wanting the others to notice.

"So what were you two chatting about?" He took a bite of the pumpkin pie Emily made and nodded toward Morgan's direction.

"He was just checking to see if I needed anything. He's going to fix the faucet upstairs." She licked the cherry residue off her fork, savoring the flavor. When Reid didn't answer for a second, she glanced over to see him watching her. She knew that look. "Get a hold of yourself, Spence," she teased, lightly shoving him.

He cleared his throat, turning back to his pie. "Right, sorry. I was going to get to that later this week, you know."

She smiled. She had lied a little white lie to Morgan; Reid was surprisingly handy around the house. "I know, but he seemed like he needed it." Reid nodded and the pair continued to eat their desserts, watching their family laugh and be merry.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Merry Christmas! This story is going to go on a slight break right now. Don't freak out, its not a long one. I'm just heading home to visit friends and family and don't know how much time I'll have to write. Also, like I mentioned before, I'm hoping for a case or two from the show to incorporate and need new episodes to do that. So it may be a few weeks before there is another chapter and the updates may slow down a bit too, but I promise it won't be too long! Hope everyone has a good holiday break. And with that, I leave you with a Christmas video I made on youtube featuring several shows, including Criminal Minds. Enjoy!<p>

youtube (dot) com/watch?v=FPMn1eugoEo


	10. Chapter 10

Author's Note: Sorry for the horrible delay on posting another chapter! First, I had a delay in writing because I was waiting for new episodes for inspiration and then after deciding to go forward without them, my beta reader had some issues personally that led to a delay of her reading them. It was a bad cycle. The good news is that while I waited on her, I continued to write so I have several chapters already and posts should happen much more frequently now! Anyway, back to the story. Thanks to sticking with me!

* * *

><p>JJ sighed as they went into the office to drop of some paperwork before going home. The new year hit the team hard with some rough cases. She couldn't wait to get Henry, go home and curl up in Spence's arms.<p>

"Tired much?" Rossi teased. JJ shoved his arm softly, too tired to comment back. The group made it to the bullpen when a blond Tasmanian devil hit her legs, causing her to almost fall over. Thankfully Spence was right behind her and supported her.

"Mommy!" Henry squeezed her legs tight. "We go home now?"

"Hi Henry. Yes, we'll go home in just a few minutes, okay?" Garcia knew they had to stop at the office so she had brought him here. The group smiled at the happy toddler.

"Yay! 'Pence, you sleep over again?"

JJ and Reid froze in place. A pin dropping could have been heard in the bullpen as the rest of the team processed what the child just said. Finally, Reid spoke, looking at JJ. "Guess we didn't think about getting ratted out by a two year old, huh?" JJ smiled and started to laugh, glad he handled it so well. They still hadn't quite decided when to tell the team since they had wanted to show that it wouldn't impact their work or the team dynamic first.

"No, I guess not." They looked around and the rest still seemed stunned.

"Well?" The pair looked back at Henry, who was waiting for an answer.

Reid bent down to his level. "I sure am buddy, but first your mom and I need to talk with your aunts and uncles okay? Why don't you come sit at my desk and color for a bit?" Reid led the young boy to his desk and found him some blank paper and some highlighters. He then walked over to JJ, took her hand and pulled her some 20 feet away from his desk. The rest followed.

"Is he implying what I think he is?" asked Garcia, her eyes wide with shock. The smiles on her friends' faces answered for her and she immediately lunged into Reid's arms. "I am beyond ecstatic for you, sweetness," she whispered in his ear. "I guess that almost kiss did mean something."

Reid chuckled, "Thanks Penelope."

"How long?" Hotch's stoic voice burst through Garcia's happiness.

"About two months ago," JJ answered.

A small smirk crossed their leader's face as he turned to the most senior agent. "I believe you owe me twenty bucks, Dave." This time it was JJ and Reid's turns for their mouths to drop open.

"You knew?" Reid asked.

"We suspected it, but I'll admit you did a great job of hiding it at work. I appreciate your professionalism." Hotch answered with a smile. "So before you ask, there is no rule per say even though you're on the same team. It's just frowned upon because some agents couldn't control themselves." His eyes landed on Rossi and the whole group laughed.

"I'm not sure what you're implying Aaron." Rossi pretended to look innocent. "Seriously, only two months? I could've sworn it was longer."

"How did you two know? We're all profilers here and I didn't pick up on anything. I mean, I know Reid was spending more time with Henry after Will but…wait, two months? So you were together during girls night? No wonder you didn't like any of the guys we found." Emily rambled, very uncharacteristic for her.

"Breathe, Em," JJ teased. "Yes, we were together then. That's why I left early, I had someone waiting."

Reid turned red. "JJ," he groaned.

Morgan chuckled, "Damn, Pretty Boy, you're about three shades of red there."

JJ wrapped an arm around Reid's waist, hugging him. "Sorry hon." That earned awws from the girls, caused JJ to giggle and Reid rolled his eyes.

"I don't think you're helping." The guys laughed. "So, are we fine?" Everyone nodded. Garcia opened her mouth, but Reid cut her off. "Garcia, I know you're dying for details, but we have a sleepy toddler to get home." He nodded in the direction of his desk and the group looked back to see Henry struggling to hold his head up. Apparently that burst of energy at their greeting was all he had.

Garcia smiled. "It can wait, go my loves." JJ and Reid bid good night. The group watched as Reid picked up the young boy, who wrapped his little arms tight around his neck, quickly falling asleep. JJ easily gathered their things and the pair left.

"They are quite cute," Emily sighed. Garcia nodded as the group dispersed. Hotch smiled to himself. It was times like this he wished he knew how to get in touch with Gideon. It would be nice to tell him that although it took nearly a decade, the couple he'd set up on a date finally got together.

* * *

><p>"So, we're waiting," Garcia stated, swaying back and forth in her computer chair, playing with one of her favorite pens. JJ hardly had time to set down her things a get a cup of coffee before she was pulled into her friend's office. Emily was blocking the door with her seat. "Dish."<p>

JJ rolled her eyes. "What do you want to know, Garcia?" She saw the look in her friend's eyes and added, "Keeping in mind, there are some boundaries Penelope."

Garcia fake pouted. "Fine, no bedroom questions. Well, except that you've crossed that line, right?"

JJ smiled, taking a long sip of her coffee. She figured that would come up. Everyone always assumed that Spence was a virgin or at least didn't have much experience with women; she was guilty of that thought herself. While it was true he certainly didn't have experience like Derek 'Ladies Man' Morgan, he wasn't naïve when it came to the bedroom either. JJ started to blush, her thoughts quickly becoming inappropriate for work.

Emily laughed, noticing her friend's face. "That's a yes. Something tells me it's good by the smirk on your face."

JJ shook the dirty thoughts away for the time being. "I plead the fifth." The group laughed and continued to share in some girl talk.

Morgan laughed to himself as he watched his friend stare at his baby girl's closed door. "Worried your secrets are being spilled?"

Reid coughed, turning away, pretending he didn't just get caught. "Um, no."

"Sure, lover boy." Reid rolled his eyes and tried to focus on the folder in front of him, only Morgan wasn't about to let that happen. The senior agent leaned against Reid's desk. "So, when did you finally make the move?"

"I really don't think that's any of your business, Derek," Reid replied, not really wanting to have this conversation.

"Don't worry, I'll fill you in, sugar." Both men looked up to find Garcia and the rest of the girls. Reid groaned and laid his head his desk.

"I'm doomed."

The group laughed and JJ patted his arm. "I didn't share that much, I swear."

"Round table room in five minutes." Everyone looked up to see Hotch standing on the second level, a very small smirk on his face.

"I've never been so happy to get a case," Reid muttered as the group prepared to find out who their next unsub would be.


	11. Chapter 11

Author's Note: Thanks for all the continued support! This one will touch on one of the newer episodes but then it will go away from the current plot line for a bit (that's what happens when they take too much time off!). This chapter is also a little short, but I needed it to set up the next several. Enjoy and please continue to read and review!

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><p>Reid felt a little distance between himself and JJ at his makeshift birthday party in the conference room and he had a feeling he knew why. However, he chose to ignore it until they were away from the prying eyes of the rest of the team. It hadn't gone unnoticed that the rest would observe them more now that they knew they were a couple. He knew it was just curiosity, particularly because the pair had been able to hide it from them for a few months. However, it didn't make things easy for the two when something was off.<p>

The pair was quiet as they entered her house since Henry was asleep. JJ thanked and paid her babysitter as Reid headed up into the bedroom and started to change into sleepwear. He really appreciated the team's birthday celebration; even it was three months late. He never really thought he'd be where he was at the age of thirty and, in general, he was happy. There was a part of him that was worried, but he just kept pushing those thoughts away, along with the pain he felt starting to build behind his temples.

He was thinking about the party and taking off his shoes so he didn't notice JJ had entered the room until he felt something being pulled on his head. Something that felt familiar. He glanced up and recognized the rim the hat.

"Happy belated birthday, Spence," JJ whispered with a soft smile. He noticed it didn't quite meet her eyes.

"Thanks JJ. I can't believe you kept this hat for six years." He took it off and stared at the blue and white birthday cake hat with a grin. "I'm just glad that Morgan didn't put trick candles on the cake this time."

JJ chuckled softly and he put an arm around her. "Are you going to tell me what's bothering you?"

JJ sighed. "I really hate profilers sometimes. I just feel bad that I missed your birthday. And I don't say I was dealing with other things, it's no excuse for missing your big 3-0."

Reid ran a hand through her silky hair. "It really is fine, Jayje. I purposely didn't mention it because we - the whole team - were still not quite back to normal yet. I didn't want you guys to throw a party together when I probably wouldn't even want to be there. This was better, I promise."

JJ nodded and put the hat back on him. "Well, on the plus side the birthday present I can give you know wasn't even on the table then." She kissed him softly at first until he moaned and pulled her into his lap. "Let's celebrate your thirties in style." Reid chuckled as he worked his way down her neck.

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><p>JJ stretched to the other side of the bed, expecting to find a warm body to curl into. Instead she was met with cold sheets. She opened her eyes to find herself in an empty bed. She furrowed her brow as she looked around. "Spence?"<p>

Finally her ears picked up the sound of splashing water. She waited, expecting him to return. When ten minutes had by she got up to check on him. She gently tapped on the bathroom door, surprised to see no light creeping through the crack at the floor. "Spence, you okay?"

Reid opened the door and offered her a small smile, "I'm fine. Just have a headache."

JJ nodded, "Oh. Did you take something?"

"Yeah. Come on; let's go back to bed. We still have another hour before we need to get up." He pulled her back to the bed, hoping she'd drop it. He couldn't seem to bring himself to talk to her about the headaches yet, to open up about his biggest fear. Thankfully, she didn't ask anything more, just curled into his side as they lay down. He sighed as she ran her fingers through his hair, calming him down. Why couldn't he tell her?

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><p>Morgan studied his friend as he stirred sugar into his tall cup of coffee. It was his fourth one and it was only 10:30 in the morning.<p>

"Late night?" Reid jumped, causing the coffee to tip over and spill on his hand.

"Son of a…" Reid turned on the faucet and ran cold water over his hand. Morgan quickly ran over and cleaned up the spill.

"Sorry man, didn't mean to startle you." He watched as Reid nodded as he studied his hand. "Need me to get the first aid kit?"

"I think it'll be okay, it wasn't quite hot enough to burn." There was a lull in the conversation as Reid studied his hand and Morgan studied him.

"So…late night?" Morgan started again. Originally, he assumed something good, but now he wasn't sure.

"You could say that." Even though Morgan knew about the headaches, he still really didn't want to talk about them. He rubbed his eyes and sighed.

Morgan frowned. "How long has this one been going on?"

"This one?"

The men turned around to see JJ standing there with a few files. "There has been more than just this one headache?"

Morgan glanced between the two, sighing as he realized he just caused an issue. "Sorry Reid."

Reid nodded, acknowledging Morgan while not breaking eye contact with JJ. "Yes."

JJ swallowed. "For how long?"

"Almost a year."

Morgan hung his head, not realizing himself that it was going on that long. He started to sneak out of the break room to give them some privacy when Garcia popped in.

"Come on, my lovelies, we have a case." She glanced between two of her favorite people before meeting Morgan's eyes. "What'd I miss?"

"Nothing." JJ spun on her heels and headed out, trying to grasp what just happened and what it all meant.

Reid sighed and dried off his hand before following a very confused Garcia out of the break room. Morgan squeezed his shoulder and kept him next to him, letting Garcia get some distance between them. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you hadn't told her."

"It's fine Morgan. I should have a long time ago." He picked up his speed a little and Morgan let him go and let the burning question die on his tongue as they reached the meeting room.


	12. Chapter 12

"Why didn't you tell me?" JJ stared out the window while he sat on the edge of the bed. She was grateful Henry was at a sleepover with a friend from daycare. He didn't need to overhear this conversation that had been waiting to happen now that they were back from the case. She had managed to keep herself from cornering him while in New York, not wanting another station blow up like last time. Now that they were back, however, she finally asked the question that was bothering her most.

"When should I have told you that would have been the right time?"

JJ spun around and glared at him. "How about when they started?"

"You were at the pentagon."

JJ crossed her arms. "When they got worse."

"Emily had just died."

JJ started to pace, how was he so calm? "When they got better? They have gotten better, right?"

Reid nodded. "They did. But then Will left."

Silence hung in the air as she absorbed this. "Okay fine, maybe there wasn't a good time. That doesn't mean I wouldn't have listened, wouldn't have been there for you. So why didn't you tell me? Why does the rest of the team know, but not me?"

He shook his head. "Only Emily and Morgan. I told her right before Doyle and he found out a few weeks after her funeral." He flopped back on the bed with a sigh. "I don't know why I didn't tell you sooner, especially after…"

JJ studied him and she got a sick feeling in her stomach. She slowly sat down next to him on the bed. "You still don't trust me, do you?"

Reid looked at her, eyes wide. "What?"

"You said so yourself months ago, that you 'trusted' me. Have I not rebuilt that? When you did trust me, I wasn't here because of the damn pentagon. Now, that trust still isn't pieced together, is it?" She hung her head in her hands. "I honestly can't say I blame you either. I lied about Emily and then got bitchy when you called me on it. Why should I expect you to open up about everything even though we're sleeping together now?"

Reid sat up. "Is that how you view this relationship, is that we're just sleeping together?"

JJ immediately looked at him. "What? No! God no, Spence, I didn't mean it that way."

"What way did you mean, JJ?"

JJ stood up and started to pace again. "I meant that just because our relationship has moved past friendship that I shouldn't expect you to spill your guts about everything." She stopped and stood in front of him. "But I do expect you to be honest with me, and me with you. So, do you trust me?"

Reid looked into her eyes, and realized he needed to be honest with her. And himself. "I…don't know."

JJ's arms fell limp beside her and she took a step away from him. Tears started to stream down her face. "How can you be in love with me and not trust me?"

He hung his head. "Because I've been in love with you for seven years, JJ. I fell in love with the JJ that forced me to wear that ridiculous birthday hat, somehow beat me at gin, who forced me feel Henry kicking, and was more concerned about me then the fact that she was going into labor. I guess I haven't connected that JJ to the one that let me cry for weeks on end without saying a word and made me think it was wrong for me to be upset with her."

"But, I'm still that same JJ, Spence. I'm the one that wished she had kissed you on our date after the game, the one whose heart exploded when she watched you die in that cabin, the one who cried out of relief in her office when she found out you were going to recover from anthrax. I wish I knew how to take back this last year." She sat down next to him on the bed and he took her hand. "What do we do now?"

"What do you mean?"

"Can you be in a relationship with someone you don't trust? Can I be in a relationship with someone who doesn't trust me?"

"I do love you, JJ." Reid gently pushed some hair out of her face.

"And I love you, but I don't know how to make this work. At least right now." JJ leaned in a placed a soft kiss on his lips.

"I understand." Reid kissed her once more. Then, without another word he left as both of their hearts broke.

* * *

><p>"Hotch, you wanted to see me?" JJ appeared in her boss' office the following Monday. Hotch nodded and gestured to one of the chairs in front of his desk.<p>

"Yeah. I wanted to ask if you knew if Reid was okay." JJ furrowed her brows. "JJ, it's nearly eleven in the morning and he's not here. He's not answering his cell either. Is he sick and just forgot to call in?"

JJ tried to keep her expression calm while the panic started to consume her. She had purposely holed up in her office this morning just so she didn't have to see him and hadn't even noticed he hadn't come in. "Not that I'm aware of, Hotch. He was fine on Friday night." Hotch looked at her questioningly; she should have expected that. "He had some things to work on so we didn't hang out over the weekend."

Hotch nodded, appearing to accept her answer. She opened her mouth to continue when her phone rang. She didn't recognize the number, but it was local. Hotch nodded for her to answer. "Agent Jareau."

"_Is this Jennifer Jareau?"_

"Yes. May I ask who is calling?" She vaguely noticed her heart starting to race.

"_This is Tiffani, I'm a nurse calling from George Washington Hospital. We have you listed as the emergency contact for Spencer Reid."_

"Wh—what happened?"

"_Dr. Laple would like to talk to you in person, when can you come in?"_

"I'm heading in right now." JJ disconnected the phone call and just sat there, stunned for a moment.

Eventually, she realized Hotch was calling her name. She didn't realize it had been for a few minutes nor that he was had been loud enough that the rest of the team heard and was also in the office, concerned. She blinked, regaining her ability to think. "I need to get to George Washington."

"Is it Henry?" Garcia asked from behind her.

JJ shook her head. "It's Spence." Just saying his name made her lose focus again. She didn't even realize that Hotch and Morgan stood her up and walked her down to the garage or that Emily put her into the SUV. All she could think was - what had she done?

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><p>Dun, dun, dun...don't kill me for leaving it there! So what's wrong with Reid? Please R&amp;R...the more I get the faster I'll post! ~Ann<p> 


	13. Chapter 13

JJ swallowed the bile filling her throat as she walked into his ICU room. She took in the IVs hooked up to his arms, the nasal cannula in his nose and the bandage wrapped around his eyes. What had happened this weekend? She slowly walked towards the bed and gently took a hold of his hand. He hardly responded to her touch.

This was all her fault. If she had just been honest with him about Emily or had handled his anger better, maybe she would have never lost his trust. Maybe he would have opened up more. Maybe they wouldn't have taken a break. Maybe she would have been with him this weekend and could have done…something.

Maybe…

"Ms. Jareau?" JJ spun to find an older, balding man with glasses standing in the doorway.

"Yes. Dr. Laple?" He nodded and entered the room, closing the glass door behind him. "He was fine on Friday. What happened? Why are his eyes bandaged?"

"Do you know if he's still been having the headaches?" JJ nodded. "That's what I thought. His neighbor found him down on his floor and when he woke him up, he couldn't see and had a panic attack."

"Couldn't see?"

"It should just be temporary. We're running another MRI and some other tests, but I doubt we're going to find a physical cause. I still believe its psychosymatic."

JJ felt her knees go weak and was lucky that the doctor was able to catch her. She didn't even notice the nurse quickly bring her a chair. "Are you aware of his mother's condition?"

Dr. Laple nodded. "Yes. That can't be ruled out, but I find it unlikely. He's a few years out from when onset typically occurs. It is, however, something to watch for. Has he been under a great deal of stress lately?"

JJ sighed and nodded. "Our whole team at work has had a really tough year. He was probably the most affected." Did she do this to him? "Is that what's causing this? Stress?"

"I believe so, yes. But we'll know more after we get his tests back. Right now we're just keeping his eyes covered because he's been extremely light sensitive and keeping him comfortable with some pain medication." JJ nodded, turning back to the man she loved. Dr. Laple started to leave when something connected for her.

"Wait. What pain medications?"

"Right now a Fentanyl drip, but we usually switch patients over to dilaudid-"

"No!" Dr. Laple's eyes drew wide and JJ took a deep breath. "Do not, under any circumstances, give him dilaudid."

"Is he allergic?"

JJ paused. "Yes." He wasn't sure about telling the doctor about his addiction. She'd prefer if he could do that himself. Dr. Laple nodded and left her alone. She turned back to him and pulled the chair to the side of the bed. Resting her head on his hand that she held so tight, she silently cried.

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><p>JJ startled when a hand touched her shoulder. She looked up to see a petite nurse in colorful scrubs. "Sorry, miss, but visiting hours are over for now. We can only let you back for half hour intervals throughout the day." JJ frowned, not wanting to leave his side. The nurse touched she arm again, "I'd let you stay but I actually have to prep him for his MRI. They are coming to get him soon."<p>

"Oh, okay." JJ stood up and bent down and placed a kiss on his cheek. "When can I come back?"

"I'll get you a copy of our visiting hours." JJ soon found herself in the waiting room surrounded by the team. She hadn't even remembered them coming with her. Rossi was the first to notice her haze and led her to a seat.

"What's wrong with my boy?" JJ registered Garcia's voice as she stared at the floor.

JJ looked up to find five sets of eyes staring at her expectantly. The feeling of deja vu did not escape her. She was also facing a similar situation with what to tell them and what not to tell. She desperately wanted to prove to Reid that she could be trusted. How much would he want them to know? He's so private that she was afraid of saying too much. But if she didn't say enough then she'd have everyone upset with her…again.

She took a deep breath. "His neighbor found him down at his apartment and called EMS. He's been having some headaches that have made his eyes light sensitive. He's in the ICU right now so they can more closely monitor him while they run some tests." She took another breath, hoping that would satisfy them without revealing too much. She didn't want to mention the concern about schizophrenia, his hopefully only temporary blindness, or that they almost gave him dilaudid. Or that she felt their fight was the cause.

The group was silent for a minute as the news sank in. Hotch looked upset, mad with himself that he didn't push about the headaches in Miami. Rossi looked saddened that so much had happened in his young friend's life. Garcia was on the verge of tears, worried about her little brother. Emily and Morgan both looked ashamed, wishing they had done something sooner.

Emily was the first to speak. "He said they were getting better." Everyone looked at her stunned, except for Morgan and JJ.

"You knew?" Garcia exclaimed. "Why…why…why does this family keep lying to each other? If we can't trust each other how are we supposed to help our victims and their families?"

"I'm sorry, Penelope," Emily answered. "He told me in confidence shortly before Doyle reappeared in my life."

"He told me during the Portland case after Em's funeral. I figured he was just depressed about losing a friend, like the rest of us." Morgan hung his head in his hands.

"I knew something wasn't right after Miami but didn't push it." Hotch pitched his brow. JJ looked around her and saw her friends either covered in guilt or angry with the rest. This couldn't happen again. Not when she knew who was to blame.

"Stop it, all of you. This isn't any of your faults. It's mine." She stood up and started to pace, fresh tears starting to stream down her face. "Emily's death, although necessary for her safety, damaged this team. It broke the trust in each other, as coworkers and friends. But no one probably suffered as much as the man lying in that hospital bed. So many people have betrayed him throughout his life and I was the one that finally pushed him too far."

JJ started to sob uncontrollably as she sank to the floor. She did this; she stressed his brain out so much that she blinded him. The headaches started when she left, got worse when she lied to him, and shattered him when they broke up. She needed to stay away from him; she had caused him too much pain. She would never be able to live with herself if she was the stressor that caused a psychotic break.

Garcia's arms around her finally registered as she gasped for air, her body shaking. "What are you talking about, JJ?"

"Ms. Jareau?" Everyone turned to see a nurse standing there.

"What is it? Are his results back yet?" JJ asked, being helped up by the others.

Tiffani shook her head, "No, ma'am. We're just about to take him down now. I came in here to tell you that we understand what you're going through, but Mr. Reid isn't our only patient." She briefly glanced around and for the first time JJ registered the several other huddled groups in the waiting room.

JJ nodded, "I understand, I'm sorry."

Tiffani came closer and gently touched JJ's arm, "Do you want to speak with someone? A chaplain, perhaps?"

The rest all started to speak for her when she nodded. "Actually, yes. Thank you."

Tiffani nodded, "I'll page John. He'll be here shortly. And I'll let you know when we're back so you can visit again." JJ nodded and took a seat.

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><p>AN: Thanks for all the continued support! Hope this makes some of you at least breathe...of course Reid didn't use again, I'm not _that_ mean. I also want to quickly mention that some of the information in this and the next few chapters came from some research and my own educated guess. The secondary characters also are loosely based on a doctor (although physically he's the one we saw with Reid last season), a few nurses, and the chaplain that are part of the ICU team at my work. This also goes for some of the characteristics of the ICU/hospital as such. Don't worry, I didn't write myself in there...although Reid probably could use a dietitian to talk to him, lol! Anyway, I just wanted to mention that before anyone asked.

Thanks again and please read and review!


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: So sorry for the delay! Had family visiting this past week and was busy prepping for them the week before. The postings are probably going to slow down a bit, I'm a few chapters past this point but have hit some writer's block so please stick with me. Thanks! Now, on to the next chapter.

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><p>"So I understand you wanted to talk?" John gestured to a seat in his office connected to the small chapel in the hospital. He had hurried from his office when he got Tiffani's page about distraught family of the newest patient in this ICU. Despite the emotional rollercoaster that working at a hospital can be, he truly enjoyed providing comfort to those in need. Or even just playing the role of a soundboard. He wasn't sure what role he would be taking on today, but as soon as he arrived to the floor he could tell that this patient had many people that cared for him. He could also tell that one in particular was overwhelmed and gently escorted JJ out of the waiting room.<p>

JJ sighed and sat down. "I guess I'm a little confused right now. I don't know what to do." John nodded but remained silent. "I think Spence would be better off if I just left his life. I've stressed him to the point where his body couldn't take it anymore and now he's in that bed."

John glanced at the brief history of the patient, Dr. Spencer Reid, that he jotted down when talking to Tiffani. "Why don't you tell me a bit about him? What does he do?"

JJ ran her hand through her hair. "We're both profilers for the FBI's behavior analysis unit."

John nodded, that explained the interesting mix of their group, most with guns still on their hips. "So you track down serial killers and such?" JJ nodded. "That must take its toll, seeing so much destruction."

"Particularly for Spence, he's has an eidetic memory and can't forget the things we see. Not that the rest of us really can either." JJ started to fidget with her hands.

"Has this past year been particularly rough? Dr. Laple noted that's how long his headaches have been going on."

JJ sighed again, resting her head in her hands. "Yes. I was forced to leave the team for a different department and only recently got reinstated. Another member got into some trouble and had to leave as well, and my boss and I had to lie to the rest, to Spence, to keep her safe. Then we were able to bring her back, but by then the damage was done. Spence's trust in me was broken. Then when he tried to just tell me how he felt, I jumped on him, trying to deflect the guilt I felt onto him. I should have listened, should have let him vent, then maybe he wouldn't have bottled it up."

JJ stood up and started to walk around the small office, John quietly watching. "Then my boyfriend left, making me a single parent. But Spence, always so sweet, was willing to help me because he's Henry's godfather, even though I didn't deserve it. I thought things were going well. We even crossed that line to something beyond friendship, something both of us have wanted for years. I pushed again, though. We weren't ready for that step. He says he's forgiven me, but he still doesn't trust me. So we broke up on Friday. And then this happened."

She stopped and met John's eyes. "I did this, didn't I? I'm the cause of his headaches. I should just leave his life for good, he'd be better off."

John frowned. He had heard many a sad tale before in this job, but even this was a lot to take in. "Did he ever talk about why this teammate hurt him so much?"

"Yeah, because he never got to say goodbye. Just like so many others in his life." JJ sat back down, suddenly tired.

"And you think the solution, what's best for him, is to leave as well?" JJ froze, realizing the flaw in her logic. She shook her head and started to cry again. How could she have any tears left? John suddenly had an arm around she shaking shoulders, calming her down.

"Look, I may not know either of you very well, but I can tell you care deeply about this young man. And I'd be willing to bet that he cares about you too. But when trust is broken it takes time to heal, its takes small actions of faith and courage to rebuild it." JJ started to calm down and listen to his words. "I know you're scared." He paused and JJ looked up and met his kind eyes. "There is a favorite quote of mine, that says 'Courage is doing what you're afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you're scared.' Do you understand what I'm saying?"

JJ nodded and smiled softly before hugging a man she didn't even know but who saved her sanity. "Thank you." John nodded and smiled. She decided to spend some time in the chapel, to be alone with her thoughts. About two hours later, she found John again who then escorted her back to the neuro ICU waiting room.

She found Emily all by herself. When her friend saw her she spoke. "Morgan and Garcia are visiting him right now, he just got back from the MRI. Hotch and Rossi went to get something to eat." JJ nodded and took a seat next to her. "You okay?"

JJ nodded. "I'm better. I think John would make a good profiler." Emily and her shared a smile. JJ looked down, almost afraid to approach this topic but knew it needed to be done. "Emily, have you and Spence really talked about why he was upset with your fake death?"

Emily looked down, not wanting to have this conversation. After Reid had opened up to her about pondering if he had done enough with his gifts, she had hoped they were past everything. Apparently JJ didn't think so. "Not in so many words, but I figured it was the lying and deceit he was upset by. Why, did he tell you differently?"

JJ nodded. "He did, but it's not for me to share. When he's doing better, in a normal room or at home, I think you should talk. Let him say what he's been trying to say to all of us since you came back. I think one of the reasons he's in the position he is right now is because he's bottled things up. I also know none of us helped by making him think he couldn't have those feelings."

Emily nodded, remembering her words trying to convince him to go to Rossi's for dinner months ago. "I will."

"JJ." The pair looked up to see Morgan and Garcia. "Dr. Laple wants to see you." JJ nodded and stood, walking past them, but Morgan stopped her and pulled her into a brief hug. "We're here for you both, you know that right? Don't think this is your sole burden to bear," he whispered before pulling away.

She met his eyes and nodded before entering the ICU again. She found Dr. Laple in Spence's room, removing the bandage around his eyes. "I'm hoping that's a good sign," she sighed.

Dr. Laple turned and nodded. "The MRI was negative, no changes from his last one. We're going to remove the bandage and wean down his sedation. I'm hopeful his sight will be back and that we can work on keeping this from happening again."

JJ nodded. "Thank you. How long do you think it will be before he wakes up?"

He finished removing the bandage, disposed of it with his gloves and then sanitized his hands before facing her again. "It varies from patient to patient. It didn't take a very high dose to keep him comfortable given his smaller stature so I would bet that it won't be more than a few hours before he's fully awake."

"Will he be able to move to a regular room soon?" She hated that she couldn't stay with him all the time; she wanted him to know that she wasn't going anywhere.

"If everything is fine when he wakes up, we'll likely move him out in the morning." Dr. Laple left the room to write some orders in his chart, leaving JJ alone in his room again. She went to his bedside and took hold of his hand. Tiffani soon appeared, adjusting his dosages on his IV machines.

"You can stay a little longer this time," she stated to JJ. JJ nodded and smiled in thanks, squeezing his hand. She felt him gently squeeze back and her heart skipped a beat.

"It's okay, Spence, I'm right here," she whispered, holding his hand until she was required to leave.


	15. Chapter 15

"JJ…"

Tiffani glanced up from her computer where she had been finishing her charting and looked through the glass wall separating her from Dr. Reid's room. It was just before shift change and she wanted to have everything ready to explain to the night shift nurse. She could have sworn she heard her patient speak. Quickly finishing her last few charting notes, she saved the information and entered his room.

"JJ…"

Okay, that time she definitely heard it. Dr. Reid started to move more in his bed. His head was turning from side to side and his hands were grabbing at the sheets. She frowned; this wasn't how she wanted him to wake up.

She poked her head out the door when she saw Annie walk by. "Hey Annie, can you go out into the waiting room and see if Ms. Jareau is still here? Bring her back if she is." Annie nodded and headed out. Tiffani turned back to her patient.

"It's okay Dr. Reid, you're safe. It's okay." She placed her hands on his arms, trying to calm him. If this didn't work soon she'd have to give him something and she really didn't want to do that.

"What's wrong?" She turned to see Ms. Jareau, or JJ has she had asked to be called, standing there with Annie.

"I think he's having a nightmare or an hallucination and I can't calm him down. Can you try? Otherwise I will have to medicate him again." JJ nodded and was quickly at his side. She bent down and whispered into his ear. Tiffani noticed his body relax and sighed in relief. Clearly, the couple in front of her had a connection. Suddenly, his eyes were fluttering open and JJ was holding his hand. "Annie, can you page Dr. Laple for me and let him know Dr. Reid is awake?"

"Spence?" JJ whispered his name, slightly afraid that he would hate her given how they left things.

Reid blinked several times, adjusting to the light. His vision seemed a little hazy, but he knew who the face with a golden hue around it was. "JJ."

"Can you see me?" Reid nodded and pulled her down to him, kissing her softly. Tiffani smiled at the scene and left the room, giving them some alone time until the doctor was back. "I'm so sorry, Spence," JJ stated after they parted.

"For what?" His voice cracked a little from lack of use.

JJ frowned softly. "What's the last thing you remember?"

"I'd be interested to know the answer to that myself." The pair turned and saw Dr. Laple in the doorway; he had actually been on his way to the floor when he got the page. "But first," he made his way to the bedside and JJ stepped back to give him room. "Let's check out your eyes." He flashed a small light into Reid's eyes, causing a slight wince. "Still a little light sensitive, but that should hopefully fade away." He finished his exam and noted no other concerns.

"What caused this then?" Reid asked. Dr. Laple went on to explain the test results and his continued theory of a psychosomatic cause.

"I know you're concerned about inheriting your mother's condition, but I honestly don't think that is the cause. From the brief information your friend told me, it sounds like you have had an incredibly stressful year. I'm recommending you take some time off from work and consider seeing a psychologist." Reid opened his mouth to object. "Or find some other way to work through your stress. Another person to talk to, exercise, reduce your caffeine intake, music. Find something, Dr. Reid, or you're going to end up right back here and we may not be so lucky for finding no damage."

Reid and JJ nodded, and he spoke. "I understand."

"Good. Now, we're going to keep you back here over night to as a precaution. You should move out to a regular room tomorrow and I'll probably keep you for just a few more days to check over everything. But, back to your friend's question."

Reid nodded, "The last thing I remember is getting back to my place Friday night and feeling like my head was about to explode. There are fragment memories of hearing my neighbor's voice after that, but that's about it." He felt JJ's grip loosen on his hand and turned to see her covering her face with the other one. Her shoulders were slightly shaking. "JJ."

"I'm so sorry Spence. We never should have fought. I should have focused on the bigger picture of trying to find the cause of your headaches instead of breaking up with you for not telling me about them." He gently pulled her to him and she hugged him tight. Neither noticed the doctor quietly leave the room. "I don't want to break up, Spence. Yet I also know we can't go back to where we were before. I want you to trust me and I'm willing to do whatever it takes for however long it takes to regain that." She pulled back to look into his eyes. "Please don't give up on me."

Reid smiled softly and tucked some of her hair behind her ear. "I won't."

JJ kissed him softly on the cheek before standing up. "Now get some rest. We have a lot to talk about tomorrow. Right now, I need to tell the team you're awake and to get them to leave the waiting room." Reid nodded as she gave his hand one last squeeze before leaving.

* * *

><p>Reid sighed as he set down his fork and pushed the tray table to the side of his bed, still slightly nauseous. After all the sedation wore off, the headache pain came back although it was only a dull ache right now. His new nurse, Megan, asked him to try to eat something after he got to the regular floor but it just wasn't appetizing right now, not even the jello.<p>

A soft knock pulled his focus away his food tray. He looked up to see Garcia standing there with a large bag weighing her shoulder down. "Hey Pen."

Garcia smiled softly as she shut the door behind her. "Hey sweet pea. I brought some things to cheer you up from the team. Strauss wasn't happy that we all just disappeared yesterday so we'll only be able to come in shifts." Reid nodded as Garcia set her bag in the chair by his bed and started to pull things out. First, she handed him the stuffed stegosaurus he gave Henry after his seizure. "Henry said he'd make you feel better." Reid smiled as he hugged the dinosaur to his side. Then she pulled out a few crossword and sudoku books from they guys. Emily sent her Dr. Who dvds and a portable dvd player. Garcia then pulled out a thermos and set it in front of him.

"What's this?"

"Some of my homemade chicken soup. I know you liked it when you had the flu a few years back. I figured the cookies could wait until you got home." Reid smiled at the gesture.

"Thanks Garcia." The pair hugged briefly before she settled herself into the chair.

"Oh, I almost forgot. JJ wanted me to tell you that Hotch is going to give her some time off after you get out of here so she's trying to wrap up some things at the office today. She'll come by in a few hours." Reid nodded as he set things on his side table.

A few minutes went by in silence before Garcia asked what he was expecting. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" Her voice was almost a whisper and when he met her eyes, he could see she was on the verge of tears.

Reid sighed. "Originally, I didn't want to worry any of you or have you baby me, watch my every move. Don't think I didn't feel everyone's eyes on me after Tobias." Garcia nodded, admitting to that. "Then, everything just went crazy with Emily and the aftermath. We were all more focused on that. After she came back…"

"You couldn't trust any of us to share," Garcia finished. Reid nodded. "Even me?"

Reid took her hand, something he rarely did. "I'll admit that I was hurt that you and Morgan didn't get me involved with your hunt for Doyle. But, honestly, I think I just didn't want to worry you anymore than I probably was. I do trust you, Penelope."

Garcia smiled and sat up to kiss his cheek. "Well, its all water under the bridge. Now we just need to get you better. Do they know the cause of the headaches?"

Reid blinked. "JJ didn't tell you guys?"

Garcia shook her head. "No, she only told us that you were having headaches and they were running tests. That reminds me, why were your eyes covered?" Reid looked down at the stuffed animal before him and smiled softly. JJ knew his fear that this was going to cause him to inherit his mother's condition without it even being spoken; she learned about the blindness and that, for once, he had gaps in his memory. He even had Megan verify that he was 'allergic' to dilaudid when he transferred; something he was going to discuss with Dr. Laple soon. She was really trying to not reveal more than he would want. "Reid?"

He snapped out of his daze. "Sorry. They think the cause is stress. I need to work on a healthy way to relieve it." Garcia nodded. "As for my eyes, the headaches made me light sensitive so it was just a precaution."

Garcia absorbed the information and a small, devilish smile appeared on her face. Reid raised an eyebrow. "Well, I would bet JJ could help you relieve that stress." She wagged her eyebrows and Reid blushed.

"Garcia…"

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Thanks for those that are sticking with me. I know the posting have become more erratic. It's mostly because I've been staring at chapter 17 for over a month now so I was waiting until I at least got past that writers block before posting again. I'm hoping now that that chapter is over in draft form anyway, the rest should start to flow better. Anyway, please read and review, it makes my day!<p> 


	16. Chapter 16

_A/N: Sorry for delay in posting. Hope you continue the story! Thanks, Ann_

* * *

><p>"Hey kid, how are you doing?"<p>

Reid looked up from one of crossword puzzle books to see Morgan standing at the foot of his hospital bed. JJ had just left for the evening, needing to spend some time with Henry. The discussion she promised the night before was delayed because he had slept most of the time she was there due to physical therapy session right before she arrived. It wasn't that he was in bad shape; he couldn't be with his job, but apparently this last episode taken its toll on not just his brain. Regular exercise was on his list once discharged. Just about the time she needed to leave, he finally woke up and now couldn't sleep.

"Hey Morgan."

The older man took a seat. "You going to get out of here soon?"

Reid nodded, "Hopefully tomorrow. Dr. Laple wants me to take a few weeks off and see him as an outpatient before resuming work."

Morgan nodded. "Good to hear. Some time off is always a good thing." There was a pause and Reid just waited. He had a feeling this is what all of his interactions with the team were going to be like. "I'm sorry I never checked back in with you after you told me about them. I just…"

"It's fine, Derek. I doubt I would have really opened up about them too much even if you did. We're good." There was another lull as Morgan hesitated mentioning something that was bothering him. Something Reid could pick up on. "What is it, Morgan?"

Morgan sighed, "Did you have a fight with JJ before this all happened?" Reid frowned. That was a memory he did have, but why would he mention it? "I ask because JJ seems to think she did all of this. There was a lot of heavy weight on her shoulders while we were waiting to hear what was going on."

Reid sighed as he rested his head back on his pillow. He wondered about that based on her apology as soon as he woke up. "We did. I kind of sensed she might feel that way, but we haven't been able to talk about it. We will."

Morgan patted his shoulder. "Good. Hold on to her, kid. I know you have some issues, all relationships do, but despite that I haven't seen you this happy in…well, ever." Reid smiled softly and nodded. The pair then chatted and watched some TV before he had to leave for the night.

* * *

><p>Reid finished pulling a worn Cal-tech t-shirt over his head, glad to finally be out of the hospital gown. Dr. Laple was discharging him today; he was just waiting on getting his appointment set and for Megan finish all the paperwork that had to be done first. They had just gone over the list of things Dr. Laple wanted him to try before the appointment. The doctor was leaning towards Reid having an extreme version of tension headaches, which meant they may never go fully away but could, hopefully, be improved. Some of the ideas he wasn't so sure about, like yoga or acupuncture, but he was willing to give them a shot. He needed to get this under control before…<p>

"Hey Reid."

He turned at the sound of her voice and smiled. He wondered when she'd stop. Hotch and Rossi were by this morning so she was the only one left. "Hey Emily, thanks for the Dr. Who dvds."

The senior agent smiled and shut the door behind her. "You're welcome. I figured you'd enjoy them. Glad to hear you're getting out of here." Reid nodded and went back to putting some things in the bag JJ brought him earlier. When Emily didn't keep talking, he stopped and met her eyes.

"Something wrong?"

Emily sighed. "I think we should talk – really talk – about what happened this last year." She gestured for him to sit and he obliged, settling back on his bed. "I know I hurt you, but…I guess I never let you really talk about it. Instead, I used guilt to force you into keeping it inside and I know that made your headaches worse. So, let me have it."

Reid furrowed his brows. "Let you have it?"

"Tell me everything you wanted to but kept inside Reid, get it out."

He frowned; did she really want to do this? They were finally getting back to normal. "Emily…we don't need to do this. I'm over it." She simply arched her eyebrow at him. "Okay, maybe not completely…"

"Then tell me what you have wanted to since I came back. I'm a big girl; I can handle it. Even if I can't, I will if it makes you better. So start talking." She took a seat and waited.

It took a few minutes, but finally he spoke. "You were just like the rest of them."

Emily frowned. "Like who?"

Reid met her eyes. "Like my father, Elle, Gideon." He let the meaning sink in. "The only difference was that then you came back and acted like nothing had changed. Acted like you hadn't vanished from our lives without a word and without even letting us in so we could have helped, could have kept you from 'dying.' Why couldn't you just tell us what was going on? We could have been prepared, helped you face it head on and taken down Doyle without all this heartache. Do you not trust us enough? We trusted you. I trusted you."

"I was trying to protect you, the whole team, from Doyle and his men. In hindsight, maybe I should have gotten you involved from the beginning but by the time I had that thought it was too late." She paused, collecting herself. She never even thought about how her death made her like so many others that have hurt her friend. She wasn't there to witness all of them, but the way Reid reacted to Gideon leaving just a note was something she'd never forget.

"I am sorry for hurting you, Spencer. I never meant for you go through dealing with another person leaving you, particularly the way I did. If I could go back and change things, I would, but I can't." The two looked at each other for a minute as both tried to keep it together. "I'm also sorry for the way I behaved when I came back. I was so desperate to get everything back to before Doyle…hell, back to before JJ had to leave, that I didn't give you a chance to say what you needed to say to heal."

Reid nodded and let out a deep sigh. He felt like a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. Maybe Dr. Laple was right.

"I just hope that we can really, truly, move past this all now," she continued. "But, if you ever need to talk about this or anything again, please know I'm here."

Reid smiled and nodded. "I know. Thank you, but I think we already started to move past it." She looked at him and he chuckled softly. "Do you think I would have opened up about possibly leaving the BAU to you, if we hadn't?" Emily smiled. Then Reid surprised them both by getting up and pulling her into a brief hug. Her smile grew as she also felt some relief, like her friendship was finally back on track. She had no intention of letting anything else get in the way of that again.

* * *

><p>When JJ arrived to pick Reid up from the hospital, she was mildly surprised by the smile on his face as he sat on his hospital bed, his go bag at his feet. "Feeling better?" she greeted.<p>

Reid turned to meet her and smiled again. "Yeah. Can we go?" JJ laughed at his eagerness.

"Yes you can, Dr. Reid. It was a pleasure taking care of you, but please, let's not do this again." Reid nodded and smiled at Megan's humor from behind JJ.

Reid glanced at the wheelchair in front of the nurse. "Thanks for everything, but I don't think I need that."

"Sorry, but it's hospital policy." She patted the seat and Reid groaned as he took a seat, putting his bag in his lap.

"Yes, thank you," JJ added, ignoring his protesting. She handed her three cards. "One is for you. Can you please get the others to Tiffani back in the ICU and to John, your chaplain?" Megan smiled and nodded, tucking them in her pocket. JJ looked down at him in the chair. "Shall we?"

Reid smiled and took ahold of her hand, as Megan got ready to wheel them to the elevator, "Yes please." JJ was slightly surprised by the gesture, but simply smiled and follwed him to the elevator. They hadn't really talked since the night in the ICU and she was unsure of how to proceed. She was going to let him dictate where the boundaries were and respect that. Whatever it took to keep him in her life.

They climbed in the car and she put it into gear. "So," she looked at him. "Do you want to go back to your place? Or do you want to stay with me? You can stay in the guest room if you don't want to, umm…"

Reid smiled at her awkwardness. It was nice when it wasn't him for a change. "Your place is fine. I would really like to see Henry and thank him for letting me borrow Steggy." JJ smiled and nodded, glad he at least still wanted to stay with her. She let out a deep breath, taking things one step at a time.


	17. Chapter 17

Reid quietly shut Henry's door. The young boy had all but demanded he read him a bedtime story tonight after clinging to him as soon as the couple got back to the house. The pair fell back into their nightly routine for the sake of the child, but he could tell she felt awkward about it. He knew she wanted to talk, but was letting him decide when, to let him come to her. It was a gesture he appreciated.

Heading down the hallway to her bedroom, he heard almost quiet sobbing. He gently pushed the door open to see her holding her head in her hands, her shoulders shaking. He took a few steps forward and she heard the floor creak beneath his feet. She quickly looked up and saw him and then tried to rub away the tears. "Sorry," she whispered.

Reid frowned as he took a seat next to her on the bed. "For what?"

"Because I-" JJ paused. "No, never mind." She got up and went into the bathroom to wash her face. Only he followed her and shut the door behind him. She leaned on the sink. "Spence-"

"JJ, I know you're giving me space, letting me talk about things as I want. I want to talk about this. You think you caused this, but you didn't. I did this to myself." JJ opened her mouth to protest, but he continued. "Ever since my dad left, I had to take on more responsibility. By doing so, I've had years of burying anything and everything deep inside. Clearly, I've gotten too good at it."

"I know I haven't helped with that this past year, by not letting you talk when you actually did want to about things." JJ paused and walked over to him. "But I promise that won't be the case anymore." She ran her hand through his hair before gently cupping his face. "Your brain is an amazing gift. It can store so much information, but it can also store so much pain. Please let some of that of that out. If not to me than please tell someone. I can't afford to lose you. You're my best friend."

Reid held her hand to his face and kissed her palm. "I promise." He pulled her into a hug and the pair just held each other for a few minutes, enjoying an embrace they could have lost.

* * *

><p>Reid stirred in his sleep, waking in the middle of night. For a second, he couldn't figure out why until his brain registered the tossing and turning next to him. He knew he surprised her by climbing in the same bed, but he wanted to be near her, to hold her for comfort. Lying alone in the hospital bed for a few days made him realize how much more peaceful his sleep had been with her by his side. It had worked well for the past two nights since returning to her place. However, apparently, she was the one in need of comfort tonight. "JJ," he whispered, gently shaking her.<p>

He watched as her eyes fluttered opened. "Spence." She latched onto him and he gently stroked her hair. He felt her sigh against his chest and her grip loosen some.

"You want to talk about it?"

JJ chuckled sadly. "I'm supposed to be the one taking care of you, remember?" He laughed softly and rolled to his back, pulling her to his side.

"I know Dr. Laple said I need to be opening up, but that doesn't mean you get to hold it in for me. So spill it." JJ sighed and he could feel her breath on his neck.

"You were blind," she whispered. "You had to leave the team and you hated me. We broke up for good and the team hardly saw you. Everyone blamed me as well. We were never a family again." She sighed deeply. "We came so close…"

"We did, but we were given another chance. Let's just focus on that and make the most of it, okay?" JJ nodded and he met her eyes, gently pushing some hair out of her face. He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her lips, much like the one they shared after he first woke up in the hospital. That one had been out of instinct, this one was more for need. Need to be close to the only women he'd ever truly let in his heart. When they pulled apart he couldn't help but mimic the sweet smile on her face. He wasn't ready to push them any further tonight, but it felt good to kiss her again. "Feel better?"

JJ smiled again and whispered, "much." The pair settled back on the bed and quickly drifted back to sleep.

* * *

><p>JJ couldn't contain the giggle that escaped her lips at the look on his face. Reid was wrinkling his nose as he took a sip of his tea. She figured the cut back on caffeine was going to be his hardest habit to break, which was why she cut out the coffee too. Fortunately for her, her pregnancy with Henry had prepped her. That and she didn't drink six to ten tall cups per day like him. She giggled again as he dumped another spoonful of sugar in his tea. He looked up and glared at her, making her out right laugh.<p>

"I'm sorry, but you know what the doctor said. At least I'm letting you take baby steps and drink black tea," she commented as she took a sip of her green tea.

"Yeah, yeah, it's got 20% of the caffeine of coffee compared to your 5-10% in the green, but that doesn't mean it tastes any better." He took another sip and wrinkled his nose again.

JJ grabbed the sugar away from him just as he was about to reach for it. "Something tells me the dietitian that visited you would not approve of you changing to tea if you're adding a half a cup of sugar to each glass. Maybe you should just drink water."

Reid sighed. "You're probably right." He poured a small splash of milk in his tea, something he never did with the coffee and then took a sip. "Hmm, maybe the British were on to something. Did you know that originally milk was first added to tea cups to temper the glass so it wouldn't break from the hot tea?"

JJ smiled, there's the Reid everyone loved. "Is that so?" Reid nodded and smiled back, happy she was amused with his statistic. "Remind me to ask you to share the story with Morgan and Em when you're back at work. We'll have to make sure everyone remembers to get us tea now anyway."

"We probably should pack some in our go bags too, just in case. I'm sure not all of the stations we'll be at will have it as available as coffee. Oh, and if I can get used to this, maybe I'll have to invest in some loose tea and equipment. It's supposed to taste better."

JJ nodded and finished off her cup, glad to see he was making such an effort with the coffee at least. "I'll remember that. Now, quit stalling. I know you don't want to go for this run, but remember more regular exercise was on your to do list." She walked around the kitchen counter that separated them and gently poked his stomach. "Besides, eventually that metabolism of yours is going to wear off."

Reid groaned. "Maybe I've taken on more than I should at one time." JJ shook her head, handing him a bottle of water before grabbing her keys and dragging him out the door.

"We could always try yoga instead, you know."

* * *

><p>NA: Sorry for the delay! I think I finally shook some of the writers block I was dealing with off. The next big hurdle is going to be how to work around that finale. If anyone has any thoughts, let me know. Hopefully the updates will start come a little sooner now. Thanks for sticking with me! ~Ann


	18. Chapter 18

"I started to get these headaches around the time a team member, a friend, was forced to leave. I've never handled change well. When my dad left, I had to take on so much responsibility. That weight, that pain, I think has made me fearful of big change, particularly with those I'm closest to. I think that's why I've never handled people leaving well." Reid sighed and paused while standing in front of a meeting at Beltway Cops. He knew he would never want to talk to a shrink since he would know all the tricks he would use to get him to open up. But these were people he knew would listen and not judge.

"One day when I had a headache that had been going on for three days, I started to wonder if dilaudid would help. We got a case so that thought was quickly pushed away. But then…" He took a deep breath, momentarily wishing that he had his chip back from Strauss. "Then another team member faked her death, although I didn't know that at the time. The heartache nearly broke me. I even went as far as looking for where I used to buy it."

He cleared his throat and his head from that memory. "I'm still having those headaches and the doctor is still working on the cause. I need to start talking more instead of burying it inside. Tonight was the start of that. Thank you for listening." Reid started to head back to his seat. As several cops and agents patted him on his back as he walked by, he felt a weight start to be lifted off of him. Maybe this opening up thing really was what he needed.

He left the meeting an hour later and pulled out his phone. A text message from JJ informed him that the team was on their way back from Atlantic City. It was the second case they had gone on without him. He hoped they didn't have anymore until his appointment with Dr. Laple next week. He had done well over the past three weeks. He had cut down on the caffeine and was finally getting used to drinking tea. He had started to work out more, even letting Morgan drag him to the gym once. The biggest change really was the talking. He was starting to feel good about opening up more. He even had lunch with everyone on the team and finally felt they back to were they were before JJ had left for the Pentagon.

* * *

><p>"How do you feel today, Dr. Reid?"<p>

"Pretty good, actually," he answered Dr. Laple honestly as he sat across from him in the doctor's office. "Do you think I can go back to work now?"

Dr. Laple chuckled softly. "Let's discuss a few things first." Reid nodded. "Any more headaches since your discharge?"

"One, but it was actually much shorter than the others and less intense."

The doctor nodded and noted it in his chart. "Good. How is it going making some lifestyle changes?"

Reid smiled softly. "Better than I expected. I'll admit that cutting out my coffee was pretty rough, but I've made it through. I'm starting to exercise more and have been opening up some. It seems to be helping."

"That's great to hear. Now, as far as I can tell, tension headaches seem to our answer. I want you to journal your headaches from now on. When they happen, how long, how intense, and what was going on at the time. We can then review that to see if certain things seem to trigger the headaches. We may run some follow up tests in the future, but I don't want to set that appointment just yet. I do expect you to come see me if they get worse."

Reid nodded, "Understood."

Dr. Laple set Reid's chart aside and rested his elbows on his knees. "Now the other typical way to treat these headaches is through different medications." Reid opened his mouth to object, but Dr. Laple raised his hand to stop him. "However, given your dilaudid history, I am inclined to agree with your objection to not go down that road unless it becomes absolutely necessary for you to function. I'm hopeful that given how you've responded to some of the lifestyle changes that we won't need to go that route. Only time will tell, particularly now that I'm clearing you to go back in the field."

Reid smiled and the doctor couldn't help but smile in return. "I saw how close your unit is while you were in the hospital. I hope you inform them when you are struggling so they can help, okay?"

"I will. Thank you Dr. Laple." The pair stood and shook hands before Reid headed out and back to the BAU.

* * *

><p>JJ leaned against the counter in the break room, tapping her nails against her mug of tea. She knew his appointment should be over by now, but he hadn't called yet. She had offered to go with but he said he'd be fine and sent her to work. The fact that she hadn't heard anything had her on edge. Was it bad news? She should have been there.<p>

"Hey princess, what are you thinking about?" JJ looked up and smiled at Garcia briefly. Garcia frowned at her friend and walked towards her. "What's wrong JJ?"

JJ sighed. "I'm just worried. Spence had his follow up appointment with Dr. Laple today. I offered to go with but he said he'd be fine. I should have heard from him by now."

Garcia patted her arm. "I'm sure-"

"There you are." The pair looked up to see Reid in the doorway, a large smile on his face. JJ immediately let out a breath she had been holding and Garcia smiled as well.

"I'm guessing its good news based on that smile on your face," JJ stated.

Reid nodded and walked closer to the pair. "I just told Hotch. I'm cleared to come back."

"Oh that's great, my sweet!" Garcia pulled him into a hug and Reid smiled at his friend's reaction. "I have to go tell the others!" Before he could comment, Garcia was gone to find Morgan and Prentiss. He just shook his head as he looked back at JJ.

She pulled him into a hug and the pair just held each other for a few seconds. "I'm so happy that you're back. We've missed you these past few cases." Reid nodded as JJ lightly tugged on his tie when they parted. "Does he still think it's the tension headaches?"

"Yes. I need to journal my headaches from now on to see if we can isolate triggers, but he's hoping the changes I've worked on will continue to help." JJ nodded in understanding. "Thank you for your help with those these past few weeks."

"You're welcome." Reid pushed some of her hair out of her face and pulled her to him, landing a gentle kiss on her lips. Or what started as gentle. Kissing was as far as they had gone since he had left the hospital, taking it slow. This time, however, something changed. Whether is was relief from his doctor's visit, the excitement of being back with the team or something else all together, all that mattered to them was the passion that was building back up. Who knows what could have happened in that moment if they hadn't heard someone clear their throat behind them.

"Sorry guys," stated Morgan, although he couldn't hide his smile. The pair pulled apart, trying to recover from the kiss. "Welcome back kid. Hope you're ready, we've got a case in California." Reid nodded and the senior agent grinned once more before leaving. They smiled at each other before straightening their clothes and heading up to meet the rest.

* * *

><p>"Spencer, I'm fine. I swear it's just a scratch."<p>

"I don't know, I count two cuts, three bruises, a black eye, and possibly a fractured rib. I'm not telling you how to do your job, but you should probably consider getting her a cat scan."

"Ignore him," she commented to the paramedic. However, she noticed the fear in his eyes, the panic. She also noticed him briefly pinch the bridge of his nose.

"You okay?" She looked at Hotch, trying to keep her urge to hug Reid at bay.

"Yeah, I will be. What about him?" The group watched Hunter with his mom for a moment. Hotch then walked away as the paramedic finished cleaning up her wounds. Once he was finished, JJ turned to him. "Do you think we could have a minute?" He nodded and left the couple alone. JJ pulled him into the back of the ambulance and took his hands. "I'm okay Spence. Talk to me."

"I just…why couldn't you have just waited for one of us to back you up? I can't handle seeing you hurt." He sighed and closed his eyes. He could feel the headache starting to form and made a mental note to journal once on the plane.

"We each split up to take a different part of the location, just like we always do. I couldn't wait on one of you because he had a gun pointed at Hunter. I did everything by the book and it all turned out fine. I'm sorry it upset you, though."

He opened his eyes again. "I know, you're right. I guess I've just never had to go through worrying if you were okay like this. All I knew was Morgan radioing for a paramedic and that you weren't with me."

"It's a sucky feeling, isn't it?" He wrinkled his brow at that comment. "I've felt that a few times with you before. Only this time we can really talk about it. Plus now I can do this." She gingerly leaned over and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

Reid chuckled after she pulled away. "That does help. I guess I hadn't thought about how some of my actions may have made you feel in the past."

JJ smiled and squeezed his hand. "Does this mean you'll finally start to be more careful?" Reid smiled and started to lead them out of the ambulance, but she pulled back. "Did this cause a headache Spence?"

Reid nodded with a sigh. "I can feel it coming on. I never really thought about it before, but it's happened during intense moments on cases before." His thoughts drifted to Miami, one of the worse examples. JJ squeezed his hand, bringing him back to the present. "Talking about this right away hopefully helped, we will have to see." JJ nodded and the pair exited the vehicle.


	19. Chapter 19

**AN: wow, sorry about the delay in posting this! Its actually been written for awhile, but my beta has been super busy and just now got to it. The good news is that while waiting, I've continued writing and her time has opened up so the updates should hopefully be more regular now. Please continue to read and review! Thanks, Ann**

* * *

><p>"Hey Spence, this Saturday night Em and Pen want to go out for a little girl time. That okay with you?" JJ asked as she took her seat on the couch next to him while Henry played on the floor.<p>

He looked over at her briefly and nodded. "Sure. You've been so great with me, you could use a break to relax."

She took ahold of his hand, making sure to get his full attention since his eyes had drifted back to the young child on the carpet. "Hey, its not that I need a 'break' from you like you put it. We just haven't gone out since we had just started to date." He nodded, understanding what she was trying to convey, that he wasn't a burden. "So I'll just get a sitter for Henry, that way you can just have a night to yourself. I would hate to unleash the monkey down there on you if you had a headache."

"Monkey? Henry, did you hear that? Your mom thinks you are a monkey. Should we show her how monkeys act?" Henry looked up at his Uncle Spence and giggled and then joined him in making monkey sounds. JJ smiled as her two favorite men came at her to get her to join in. She didn't notice the slight hurt in Reid's eyes.

* * *

><p>"Oh, still no sitter?" Emily asked as she took her seat on the plane. JJ was shaking her head in frustration as Reid read beside her. She wasn't sure, but something felt slightly off between the pair. Maybe cancelling ladies night would be for the best.<p>

"My sitter is not available. Apparently I have a better chance at winning the lottery than finding a sitter on a Saturday night."

"What's going on tonight?" Reid asked, although he knew. He was just trying to pretend he had forgotten while continuing to look at his book.

"Oh it was ladies night, but," started Emily.

"I forgot to book the sitter," JJ answered, sending Reid a questioning look. They had talked about this and he never forgot things.

He met her eyes as he spoke. "I'll do it."

"Spence…"

Reid ignored the scoff to his right. "What? I've seen an episode of Mr. Belvidere. Plus, you already know I'm good with Henry." He sent a sideways glance at Emily, who caught it and winced.

"Reid, I didn't mean to imply that you weren't."

JJ nodded. "Of course you're great with Henry. You've just never babysat by yourself before. Are you sure?"

"What could possibly go wrong?" Emily and JJ froze; there was something in his tone. Emily mumbled something and wandered to sit across from Morgan, leaving the couple alone. JJ shifted into the now empty seat beside him.

"Spence?"

"You don't trust me to be alone with Henry, do you?" He let out a sigh, finally getting out the question that he had let stay inside for over a week now. In the past he probably would have just left it there. Now, however, he knew it needed to come out.

JJ gasped and shook her head. "Of course I do Spence. There is no one I trust more with him other than Will or myself. I just didn't think you would be up for it. You're only a few cases back. I thought you'd want a night to yourself. I never meant to imply that you aren't capable of taking care of Henry by yourself."

He studied her for a second and she let him. She could see the wheels turning in his head and she wanted to let him connect the pieces on his own. If she was ever going to fully regain his trust, everything had to come to him on his own. Finally he nodded, believing her answer. "I think I can handle him for a couple of hours."

JJ nodded and smiled. "I'm sure you two will have tons of fun. And thanks, I know Em and Pen would have been disappointed." She leaned over to kiss his cheek. Only he caught her action and turned on purpose to catch her lips. When they parted, she looked at him, a little surprised. He just smiled and turned back to his book. She chuckled quietly and called Garcia to let her know the night was still a go.

* * *

><p>"So…" Garcia started after the first drink. "How are things going with Reid?"<p>

JJ sighed softly as she twirled the straw in her drink. Looking up at her friends, she answered, "We're getting there. In some ways I feel like we're closer than we've ever been. In others…" She took a sip and rested her head in her hand. "He's the most complicated man I know. I'm just taking my time to really get to know him on his schedule."

Garcia sniffed a little while Emily just smiled. "And?" Emily encouraged.

JJ smiled. "We'll see."

* * *

><p>"Can we read it again, Uncle Pence?" Henry asked and Reid sighed softly. It was the third time he'd read Henry a story before bed. He loved that the little guy enjoyed reading, but he was about ready for bed himself. The young boy had worn him out since he had managed playtime, dinner, and bath time alone for the first time. Everything went smoothly, well except for Henry getting almost completely covered in spaghetti sauce, but it had tested Reid's energy.<p>

"One more time, Henry, and then we have to go to bed. Remember, we're getting up early to see Uncle Hotch run his race." Henry nodded and snuggled closer to his uncle's side as he read the story one more time. This time when he finished, he looked down to see Henry's eyes closing and a yawn escape. He gently rose from the bed, setting the book on the nearby shelf. He tucked Henry in, kissing the top of his head in the process.

"Good night Henry," he whispered. As he walked over to the door, his hand touched the light switch when he heard the little boy speak.

"Night Pence, love you," Henry whispered with a yawn. Reid felt his heart swell, surprised by the comment.

"Love you too Henry." He turned off the light, making sure the nightlight was on before gently closing he door and heading downstairs to clean up some before JJ got home.

* * *

><p>Reid grinned to himself as he watched the ladies grimace in pain. He handed Henry the flag he had as the four year old sat on his shoulders, just like Jack on Morgan's. The little boy followed his lead and waved it widely and hollered. He noted all three of them glare at him and he chuckled. "A couple of hours, a couple of hours! You guys didn't come back until sunrise!"<p>

"Why are you yelling?" JJ mumbled.

Emily groaned, "Make him stop."

Morgan tapped Reid's arm, gesturing for him to follow. "Okay, Jack, Henry, earmuffs for a second. Earmuffs." Reid repeated this to Henry and the two young boys covered their ears. "What did you guys drink last night?"

Garcia leaned on the railing. "The Green Fairy. You're in the FBI, can't you get the whole crowd to stop cheering?" The male agents exchanged a grin and went back to focusing on the race. Just a few minutes later they were gathered around Hotch. Reid still had Henry on his shoulders, when the young boy leaned down and whispered in his ear.

"Uncle Spence, can we get pancakes now?"

Reid grinned, "Hey you guys want to get something to eat?" The girls quickly agreed before the group heard a woman yell for Hotch from behind them. The group watched their team leader and Jack interact with a woman with curiosity.

"Pancakes?" Henry asked again and none of the adults could contain their laughter. Reid reached up behind him and lifted the little boy so he was holding him in his arms. He started to tickle the youngster whose laugh made even the hung-over ladies happy. "Uncle Spence!" he squealed before Reid finally set him on the ground and bent to his level. A happy sigh escaped the young blond as he put his hands on each side of the profiler's face. "I love you," he sighed.

Reid barely registered the collective inhale from the group, as none were expecting that comment from JJ's son. He smiled widely and put his hands on top of the boy's, thrilled that he made the statement again, this time more awake. "I love you too buddy." He pulled the young boy to him and kissed the top of his head. Just then, Hotch rejoined them so he didn't see the team's reactions.

As the group headed to their cars to get breakfast, JJ wrapped her arm around him while he held Henry's hand. A sense of peace started to settle over him and he couldn't help the smile that crossed over his face.


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: Glad you enjoyed the last chapter, those were some of my favorite scenes of the last season too! On to the next one. This one is a little longer than the rest because there was no good stopping point. Figured it was time the couple really looked at some unspoken issues. Hope you enjoy. ~Ann

* * *

><p>Reid stared at the board in the conference room in Medford. Something about this case really got to him. The way the son was so fiercely loyal to his mother, even if through delusions, to consider killing his own sister…<p>

"Reid?" The young man blinked and turned to see Hotch behind him, concern in his eyes. "Are you okay?"

Reid shoved his hands in his sweater. "I don't know. You mind if I take a few days off?"

Hotch nodded, "Sure." He squeezed Reid's shoulder, a rare gesture from the team leader, before walking out of the room. It was then that Reid noticed JJ standing in the doorway.

"Spence?" She had heard his request and was trying to figure out what was going on inside. She walked over to him, patiently waiting for him to say something.

"You want to go visit my mom with me?"

JJ blinked. Of all the questions for him to ask that was not what she expected. "If you are comfortable with me visiting Diana, I would love to." Reid nodded his agreement and JJ smiled. "Let me clear some days with Hotch and work on some flights." She didn't have to worry about Henry since he was with Will in New Orleans for Easter. She gently squeezed his arm as she walked away, hoping he would share what he was pondering when he was ready.

* * *

><p>JJ watched Reid as he watched his mom. She was sitting by a window, her journal in her hands. The blond just wished she knew what the man before her was thinking about. He'd been pretty quiet this whole time, since even before they got on the plane. The only time he was more animated was when they briefly talked with Henry over the phone.<p>

Ten minutes had passed and she decided to gently take his hand. The contact seemed to snap him out of his reverie. "Give me a minute alone with her?" he asked.

JJ nodded, "Of course."

Reid walked slowly over to his mother, unsure why he was so nervous. Sure, he never knew what state she would be in when he visited but this was something else. Ever since he discovered the mental history of their unsub it had triggered the need to know something only she could tell him.

"Spencer!"

His mother's voice made him smile as she stood to hug him briefly. "Hi mom." She pulled him down on the couch she had been sitting on.

He felt her eyes study him and he tried to school his expression. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, mom. I just missed you and wanted you to meet someone." He couldn't get himself to ask her the question in the back of his mind. She eyed him as he gestured to JJ to come over. The pair stood once more as JJ joined them. "Mom, I want you to meet-"

"You must be Jennifer." Diana pulled JJ into a hug.

"Yes. It's great to meet you Mrs. Reid." JJ had, of course, met her during the Randall Gardner case, but it was so brief she doubted Diana remembered. That felt like a lifetime ago.

"Please, call me Diana. I feel like I know you given how much Spencer writes about you in his letters." The women took a seat and Reid sat beside JJ, blushing.

JJ grinned, "I've heard so much about you as well."

Reid watched in awe as the two talked. His mom was having a good day and even recalled Henry so the pair was discussing the young boy. He couldn't have asked for a better meeting. He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard, "Oh he is beautiful Jennifer, he reminds me of Spencer as a little boy. Would you like to see some pictures?"

"Mom..." He didn't want JJ to see those. As awkward as he was when he first joined the BAU, his adolescence was worse.

JJ chuckled, "I would love to."

"Good, good." Diana ignored her son as she pulled JJ up and headed to her room. JJ grabbed Reid's hand and squeezed.

"I'll show you mine when we get home, if that helps." Reid smiled at that thought and followed the women. He just hoped his mom continued to have a good day through this.

After about 10 minutes of looking though the few photos Diana had managed to take when she was having good days, JJ was the first to notice she was starting to tire. She also knew Reid hadn't done what he came for, whatever that was. They still had another day or so, but she may not be able to provide what he needs if she doesn't have another day like this.

She yawned a little loudly. "Oh I think that jet lag is catching up with me. Diana, thank you for showing me the pictures. If it's okay I think I'm going to go to the hotel and let you two have some time alone."

Diana nodded, "Okay dear. Thank you for visiting." The two hugged again and Diana whispered into her ear. "Thank you for loving my son. It gives me some peace to know he has someone that cares for him like I do."

JJ simply nodded, trying to hold back tears at that surprise comment. She had asked before what he had told his mom, and he had only mentioned being good friends and Henry's godfather. How had she known? She smiled once more at Diana, and patted Reid's arm as she past him. "Take however long you need." He simply nodded, trying to figure out why she had watery eyes.

He turned back to his mother after JJ shut the door, a question on his face. "You never learn, Spencer, a mother knows things. You two are clearly in love, yet I sense distance. Take it from me son, whatever it is, love can fix it if you let it."

"What about you and dad?"

Diana sighed, "We didn't let it. We let the issues grow because we weren't strong enough or brave enough to work it out. Don't be like us, Spencer. Let go of whatever is holding you back and take the love she's trying to give you."

A tear slid down his face as he embraced his mother. He hadn't realized just what was truly holding him back from giving JJ one hundred percent until now. He really did trust her as a friend all along. Yes, it had been damaged with the lie about Emily, but she had proven herself trustworthy again since. However, to trust her as a lover meant opening up to her in a way he had never done with anyone. Could he really do it?

He gently kissed his mom on the forehead. "Thank you mom."

She patted him on the cheek softly. "That's what mothers are for. Now, did you have something else you wanted to talk about?"

Reid paused. He did, but right now he just wanted to enjoy however much time he had with her just like this. "Not today. Can you read me something?"

* * *

><p>JJ brushed her wet hair back, coming out of their hotel bathroom from a shower to find Reid lying on the bed. She blinked, startled. He must have come back while she was showering after spending a little time at the pool. She was surprised to see him back already.<p>

"Come lay with me a bit? Then maybe we can go out for dinner." She noticed his raised hand as an offering and was surprised he was awake. She climbed onto the bed and he pulled her to his side.

He ran his fingers through her wet hair and she sighed softly, resting her head on his chest. "Everything okay with your mom? Did you find the answer you were looking for?"

"No, we didn't get to that. But she did solve something for me I didn't realize I needed to know." He felt her nod on his chest and then shift. He opened his eyes to find her blue ones staring back at him.

"I'm here if you want to talk about it, Spence. Any of it, at any time."

As he continued to study her beautiful eyes he found the courage to ask her a question that had been in the back of his mind since their first kiss in her living room all those months ago. It was the key to deciding if he could follow his mom's advice or not.

"JJ, I need to ask you something and I need you to really, truthfully think about it before answering. Okay?" JJ nodded and sat up on the bed, waiting. She felt her heart race, unsure about where his mind was. "Can you really stick by me if my mother's illness becomes mine too? Are you sure you want to take the chance on us with that as a possibility? Can you do that to Henry?"

JJ took a deep breath. She had long thought about this, for years even. And it was one she had an answer for after she talked with John while Spence was in the ICU.

"Did you ever wonder why we didn't go on a date beyond that football game all those years ago?" Reid nodded. He had wondered if he had been a little braver and less shy then, how things could have been different. Would Henry be his son? "I long thought about what held me back after that date. I think at the time, I was concerned about how it would impact my career to date a team member." JJ paused, knowing this next part might hurt him. "When Elle was shot, I thought about you and us. Driving back from meeting Rebecca Bryant's adoptive family, I told myself to take a chance. Then I met your mother."

Reid hung his head; afraid this relationship was ending. He started to get up when JJ pulled him back down and forced him to look at her. "Spence, please, you wanted an answer. Please let me tell you all of it before you assume something." He nodded and she continued. "At that time, learning about your family's history, did make me hold back. I wasn't mature enough to handle the idea that you could inherit schizophrenia. I also didn't know enough about the disease; it really scared me. So I held back."

She ran a hand through her hair and took his hand. "It's the best decision I've ever made." Reid raised his eyebrows, stunned. "We wouldn't have made it, Spence. Think about what happened not too long after that. I was starting to fall for you then, but if I'm honest with you and myself, I wouldn't have been strong enough to pull you through the Tobias aftermath. Only you were."

Reid nodded, thinking back to that time. Some days during that stage, he wanted the team to pick him up and shake him sober, but he knew now that it wouldn't have lasted if it hadn't come from within himself. "You wouldn't have Henry either."

JJ agreed. "When I got pregnant with Henry, I was excited. I was scared. I was also a little sad." Reid gasped, not expecting that. "Sad that I was carrying another man's child. That I knew I needed to give that relationship a real try and try to put my thoughts of you out of my mind. A part of me was selfish by naming you godfather so I had an excuse to spend more time with you." She thought back to him holding Henry for the first time. How gentle he was talking about getting Henry into Caltech, made her wish it had been his child.

She shook her head, clearing her head. "Over all these years, I've learned more about schizophrenia and it no longer scares me. I've also grown as a person. Henry has made me stronger, a fighter." She took a deep breath. "While you were lying in the ICU, before they woke you, I had a full blown melt down. I disturbed the other families to the point where the nurses called the chaplain for me. I probably gave Garcia a heart attack as well. I was so afraid that our fight caused a mental break for you and that guilt…"

A shaky breath escaped her and his instincts kicked in, pulling her to him. Only she stopped him. "No, I need to get this out." She placed a hand on his cheek and pushed some of his hair out of his face. "I had a moment of fear and I thought about running. But a wise man made me see that was only the fear of what I may have done." She took his hands. "I wasn't afraid of you, of what could possibly happen. I could've, I can, handle that if it happens. My only fear at that time was that I was the reason, but I swear I won't let that happen. I'm here for you through this all. If you inherit your mom's disease, I'll support you. I know you're afraid of what these headaches mean, but they aren't going to scare me away either. They concern me; the possibility of the disease concerns me, yes. But I love you so much, Spencer Reid, that it doesn't matter. If you'll have me, I swear I will prove it to you."

Something inside him just broke. It was all he hoped to hear and yet it overwhelmed him to hear it. He never thought he would find someone, anyone that would love him despite knowing his history, his mother's history. To have that someone be one of his best friends…

Tears escaped and slide down his face as he pulled her to him, kissing her deeply. "JJ…" His voice was almost a sob due to all the emotions escaping. She pulled him to her and just held him tightly as he started to shake, finally letting it all go. Eventually, the emotional rollercoaster of the day overtook them both and they fell asleep in each other's arms.


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: Thanks so much for the continued great reviews! The last chapter was a talk I knew was needed and I'm glad everyone felt I did an alright job with it. How will the pair move forward now?

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><p>The first thing his brain registered was the sunlight penetrating his eyelids. He blinked a few times, adjusting to the light. His head was resting on her chest and he could tell she was still asleep by her even breathing. Enjoying the moment, he decided to just lie there for a few minutes.<p>

Waking up this morning, he felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Although their discussion was emotionally draining, to know that JJ wanted to be with him through it all, whatever that may be, was all he could ask for. He knew they still had so many things to talk about, so much more to get to know about each other. Yet, he also knew their relationship had taken a turn for the better.

His gaze shifted and he noticed that her tank top had ridden up over night. As he ran his hand over her exposed stomach, that desire that had been slowly rebuilding with the trust came surging back. He slowly slid his hand even higher and gently grazed the underside of her breast. He smiled when he felt her breath hitch.

"Spence…" Her voice came out as a sigh combined with a moan. He lifted his head to meet her hooded eyes. He watched as her eyes closed when as he moved his hand higher. She moaned softly before running a hand through his hair. She opened her eyes once more and locked with his. "Are you sure? We can wait some more-"

He shifted on the bed so he was hovering over her. "I love you Jennifer. So much. I trust you." With that, he kissed her so deeply and with such intensity she felt like she was about to explode. She hardly had time to register his use of her given name but it made her love him even more. No man she had ever been with had ever called her that; she'd gone by JJ ever since she was eleven. It warmed her heart in a way she never expected. The fact that he stated he trusted her nearly brought tears to her eyes.

"I love you Spencer," she breathed when they parted briefly. It was the last coherent statement either of them made of awhile.

* * *

><p>JJ finished wrapping up the two picture frames she had purchased yesterday and turned back to see Spence sitting on the bed, running a hand through his hair. She furrowed her brow. "You okay?"<p>

He sighed and leaned back on the bed. "I'm afraid to ask her." JJ sat down next to him and waited. "I want to believe Dr. Laple's theory about my headaches, but…"

"You have always wondered if it's the start of something else?"

Reid nodded. "I know my mom's disease started while working on her masters in college. I know my parents hadn't started dating just yet. Beyond that…"

JJ squeezed his hand. "Did the last case trigger this trip or have you been thinking about this for awhile?

Reid shrugged, "A little of both, I guess. Something about how James became so much like his mother through their illness. He was even willing to kill his sister. I guess…" he paused and met her eyes. "Sometimes I wonder if what all my mom and I really have in common is schizophrenia. Will I turn into James? I wanted to come here to make sure the headaches…" He let his voice trail off.

JJ hugged him tight, following his logic. That's what this trip was all about, finding out if she had headaches in the beginning as well. Why had she never thought about this before? The sad parallels between the Heathridges and Reids hadn't escaped her either, but she'd be damned if she let Reid become James. After a few minutes she asked, "You ready to go find out?" He nodded.

The pair stood to head to Bennington, but JJ pulled him back to her for a moment. "Spence, regardless of what you do or don't find out today, please know that I will never let you become like James. Okay?" A small smile crossed his face as he nodded. She kissed him softly before leaving their hotel room.

* * *

><p>"I heard you were here."<p>

The young couple turned and Reid smiled. "Dr. Norman. It's good to see you." The doctor smiled in return. "This is JJ, my girlfriend." JJ smiled and bit back a giggle, it seemed so good to hear him say that. Since they had started to date, they never had to do an introduction and she wasn't sure what he'd say.

JJ stuck out her hand and the pair shook hands. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise," Dr. Norman replied. "I will let you go visit." The pair nodded and smiled, heading to Diana's room.

Reid gently knocked and opened the door to find his mom curled up on her bed with her journal. He immediately frowned. "Hi mom."

She looked up and wrinkled her brow. "Office hours are over for today, you two. I hope you finished your final papers on time."

JJ watched as Reid deflated and sighed. She hadn't seen this side of Diana before, but knew it was possible. He stood there as if he couldn't decide how to proceed; he had placed so much hope on having another good day. She took a deep breath, praying she was doing the right thing. "We did ma'am. We just wanted to thank you for a wonderful semester; you're a great teacher."

Diana smiled and Reid took JJ's hand in thanks. "Well thank you. I enjoyed having you in my class. Perhaps you'll take the next one in the fall?"

The pair nodded and this time Reid spoke. "We'd be honored, Professor Reid. Enjoy your summer break."

She nodded. "You two as well. You know, you make such a handsome couple."

JJ smiled at that. "Thank you ma'am. We'll see you in the fall." They waved goodbye and closed her door. She immediately noticed his slumped shoulders as they walked down the hall and pulled him to her. She rubbed circles on his back as he held her tight. "I'm sorry Spence." A part of her felt guilty. Maybe if they had gotten here earlier in the day…

Reid pulled back. "It's okay JJ. I knew this might happen. I was just hoping I might get some answers, but it was a long shot for her to remember that time anyway."

JJ nodded. "Would Dr. Norman possibly know?" Reid seemed to ponder that for a moment and then nodded.

* * *

><p>"Since I didn't start to work with your mother until her forties, I can't be certain about how her symptoms started, Dr. Reid. Given your field, I assume you're aware of the typical signs?" Dr. Norman was surprised when he found the young couple in his doorway not ten minutes after seeing them. He was even more concerned when the young man he'd grown quite fond of asked about his mother's history. He, of course, was happy to oblige after getting the okay to discuss it with JJ in the room.<p>

Reid nodded. "Delusions, hallucinations, disorganized speech and behavior, along with social dysfunction that interferes with work and relationships for at least six months."

Dr. Norman watched the young man before him as he looked down at the floor. The woman with him soon squeezed his hand, an action of support that was starting to worry the elder doctor. "Spencer, are you starting to experience these symptoms?"

Reid lifted his head as he shook it. "No, but I've had headaches for over a year now. My doctor thinks they are just tension headaches but…"

Dr. Norman nodded, "But you can't shake the fear it's the prodrome or earliest symptom before the traditional ones?" Reid nodded. The doctor paused, trying to decide how to form his thoughts, recalling a conversation from years ago. He knew then that the younger Reid had some difficult things happen in his past with his job.

"Spencer, I understand your fear. Given the obvious family history, your stressful job, and some of your other history," he paused and Reid nodded, knowing he was talking about the dilaudid, "you have several factors that increase your risk. However, you are a few years past the typical onset of symptoms, which doesn't include headaches. If you are following your doctor's advice for the tension headaches, this should hopefully reduce your stress levels. You also happen to have a good support system that could help pick up on queues in changes in behavior so you can receive treatment early. I think you should just listen to your doctor for now. I'm always here if you want to talk as well."

Reid let out a deep breath, all while holding on to JJ's hand. This was all information he had tried to tell himself before, but it felt good to hear it from a doctor he's trusted for years. "Thank you Dr. Norman." The pair stood and shook his hand.

JJ paused before they left. "Dr. Norman, can you please give these to Diana when she's having a good day. I wanted her to have new pictures of Spence." She opened her purse and handed him two wrapped picture frames. One had the photo of Reid and Henry sleeping that hung in her hallway and another was one of the three of them leaving the park after Hotch's race. Garcia had snapped it when none were looking and it was one of her favorites; they truly looked like a family. She had them printed from her phone after leaving the Reids yesterday.

Dr. Norman nodded and smiled. "Absolutely." The pair started to leave his office when he stopped Reid. Reid gestured for JJ to go on ahead. Once she left the office, Dr. Norman set the presents on his desk and opened one of his drawers, pulling out a small box with an envelope taped to it. "Your mother gave this to me yesterday and asked me to give it to you. She said to tell you to take a chance." Reid opened the box and blinked; it was his grandmother's engagement ring. He hadn't seen it in 24 years; she had passed away when he was six. He was surprised his mom still had it. Tucking the ring into his pants pocket, he opened the note.

_My dearest Spencer,_

_I want you to have this. I'm sure you remember it belonged to your grandmother. Their marriage was such a happy one, I wish you could have experienced it longer to know how a relationship can be, should be. I only hope you can hold onto the love you have for Jennifer and make things work. Be brave, my son, and use this ring as good luck._

_Love,_

_Mom_


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: Thanks for the continued feedback. We're getting there, only 5 more after this, which my beta is in the middle of editing. Thanks for the continuing support. ~Ann

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><p>"Mommy! Uncle Pence!" The young boy greeted the pair as they climbed out of the taxi in front of Will's house, where Jackie and Will were sitting on the front porch.<p>

"Hey honey," JJ gave her son a long hug. She had missed him so these past few weeks, the phone calls and skype just not enough for her heart. Although she was glad that she had been able to go with Reid to see his mom, she still missed her son.

The young boy released his mom and quickly hugged Reid. "Hi Uncle Pence, did you have fun seeing your mommy?"

Reid smiled at Henry's comment. "I did Henry. Did you have fun with your dad?" As Henry began to tell him everything he'd done last two weeks, Reid had attempted to let him go. However, Henry seemed to have a tight hold around his neck. Exchanging a glance with JJ, he shrugged as he scooped him up. The pair walked over to the other couple on the porch while Henry continued. Reid waited for him to take a breath. "Wow, little man, you sure did a lot while you were here. I'm glad you had such a good time."

"We had a real good time, didn't we bud?" asked Will with a smile. He loved his time with his son. He wished he lived closer, but as soon as he went back to New Orleans, he realized he had left his heart in the Big Easy. It was no wonder he was never truly happy in Virginia. "JJ, Spencer, good to see you both. Did you have a good visit in Vegas?"

The pair nodded and JJ spoke. "We did, thanks."

"Pence, I'm hungry," Henry stated. Reid chuckled and set the young boy down.

"Why I don't I make you a snack Henry?" Offered Jackie, standing. "Maybe your mom can help me?" JJ nodded and followed the pair, although surprised. She hadn't spent too much time with Jackie since meeting her last Christmas. Although from their meetings and a couple conversations with Will, she could tell the two made each other happy. She knew Jackie had lost her mother during the Katrina aftermath and that connection drew them closer than they had been when they dated in high school.

It gave her peace of mind knowing that despite the difficulty of sharing responsibility for Henry, that no matter which house he was at it would be full of love and happiness. Something that wouldn't have happened if her and Will had stayed together.

Will watched as the women disappeared and then nodded to the now empty chair beside him. "Have a seat Spencer." Reid nodded and sat down, slightly uncomfortable. His relationship with Will had always been a little awkward since he was in love with his girlfriend and the mother of his child. He felt even more uncomfortable now that he knew Will knew how he had felt. He watched as Will leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees so he could be a little closer to him. "I'm glad to hear you're doing okay. JJ told me about you being in the hospital after Henry mentioned you being sick on the phone."

Reid smiled softly. "Thanks." He paused and cleared his throat. "Look Will, I know we haven't really talked since JJ and I…" He took a deep breath. "You have to know that nothing ever happened between us until after you two broke up. I know now that you could sense how I felt, but please know I never acted on it."

Will nodded. "I know. I accused JJ of that when I was in pain about not making our family work, but I also know you are good people and it wasn't in your nature." He glanced behind him to make sure the women weren't heading back and then locked eyes with Reid. "Although I wish I had been able to make my relationship with JJ work, we just weren't meant to be. Even during our happiest times, I've never seen her smile like she does when she's with you. I'm glad you two have finally become more than friends. I want Henry to live in an environment filled with love and happiness and I can tell he gets that with you two."

Reid blinked, unprepared for that. Finally, he regained his voice. "Thank you Will. That means a lot to hear you stay that."

Will nodded and held eye contact for a minute. "Take care of them for me." Reid nodded in agreement and the pair turned away from each other just as the rest joined them.

* * *

><p>JJ kissed the top of Henry's head after putting him to bed back at their home a day later. She then headed downstairs to find Reid sitting on the couch and reading. She leaned over to him, resting her head on his shoulder. He looked up from his book and smiled at her and she sighed softly. "Something on your mind?"<p>

"Just happy. Happy to have my son back. Happy to have us back. Actually, to have us be better than we've been before." She smiled up at him and he bent down and kissed her briefly.

"Me too JJ." She squeezed his arm and smiled. He closed his book and looked at her. "So about those childhood photos?" He grinned and she couldn't contain her laughter.

"Alright, alright. This is what I get for dating a guy who doesn't forget…" She got up and grabbed a few albums off of a bookshelf. They started to go through her baby photos with JJ providing stories and Reid commenting on how beautiful a baby she was. They were having a good time until Reid started to notice the gaps in the photos around ten years old. When they paused on one page, he noticed how quiet she got. She ran a hand over a photo and Reid noticed her sister, who had been about six years older than JJ, was in it with her.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked in a soft voice. He had sensed something had happened with her sister back during that teenage suicide case a few years ago, but he had never asked. The way she was behaving right now allowed the profiler in him to put it together, however, he didn't want to ignore the issue or make assumptions either.

JJ sighed, grabbing her necklace without even realizing it. She glanced at him and noticed the love and compassion in his eyes. Setting the album aside, she took one of his hands. "That photo was at a family picnic about a month before. You're keen sense of observation has probably noticed how often I wear this necklace." Reid nodded. "She gave it to me the day she…" She squeezed his hand with both of hers, as if it was a lifeline. "As I look back, there were signs that we should have caught."

"JJ, you were too young," Reid offered.

She shook her head, tears threatening to fall. "I guess, but that doesn't take away some of the guilt. It was really hard on all of us, but my parents..." Reid reached over to wipe away some tears that had escaped and she held his hand to her face. "They blamed each other for not seeing the signs, for not doing more to prevent it. Until this, I grew up thinking they had such a strong marriage full of love that would last forever. But the blame and shame forced them apart."

The tears were falling freely now, some even from Reid himself. Gently, and in a rare move for him, he pulled her into his lap and they held each other for a few moments. Eventually, she leaned back to look into his eyes. "It shook my foundation in relationships and marriage. Its one of the reasons I never married Will. I didn't see our relationship as strong enough to handle smaller things like my job schedule, let alone…"

Reid nodded as he pushed some of her hair out of her face. She starred into his eyes, expecting to see a question there, but only found concern and love. It made her heart melt, answering the unspoken question in her own heart. She had confessed her desire and fight to stick with him through it all. Seeing that look in his eyes, told her that he felt the same. "You don't have to worry about that with us, Jennifer," he whispered, reinforcing what she already saw.

"I'm beginning to see that, Spencer," she breathed before kissing him deeply. Eventually, they would finish her albums, seeing some of her happier moments from high school and college. But tonight, they needed each other in a far more passionate way.


	23. Chapter 23

"Hey you two, how was the trip?" Garcia greeted them the next morning. A pair of soft smiles greeted her and answered the question before either of them spoke.

"Hey Garcia, it was good, thanks," answered Reid. Even though he didn't quite get the answer he wanted from his mom about the beginning stages of her illness, the talk with Dr. Norman helped put his mind at ease some. The emotional discussions that followed with JJ lifted a lot of stress and worry off of them and also brought them much closer.

JJ squeezed his arm slightly before she started to head to her office. The two were working on being a little more professional after Hotch scolded them about the break room incident. Even though he hadn't witnessed it, word quickly got back to him. They now tried to keep themselves a little more innocent as they had in the beginning stages of their relationship. Reid made eye contact and nodded. "Morgan running late again?" he asked, taking a seat at his desk.

"Actually…" Emily paused, getting JJ's attention and causing her to turn back. "His sister was in a bad car wreck two nights ago. He's in Chicago now."

"Which sister? Is she going to be okay?" JJ asked.

"It was Desiree and as far as we know, yes she will be. She chased after another car at a stoplight and got hit twice. She was pretty lucky." Garcia supplied.

Reid frowned, knowing how close Morgan was with his family. It was something he could be envious of if he allowed himself to be. "Why was she chasing another car?"

"I'll answer that. Round table room now," stated Hotch from the walkway. The group exchanged some concerned looks before heading up stairs.

* * *

><p>Reid headed back down the plane to his seat next to JJ. She hadn't spoken much since they had left Chicago, just stared out the window. It concerned him. "You okay?" he asked as he sat down and she jumped slightly at his voice. He frowned; something was eating at her. "Jennifer?"<p>

She turned, meeting his chocolate eyes and sighed. "Sorry. It's stupid. Something Ford said about letting my kid be raised by someone else…" She curled into his open arms, not worried about being more affectionate when it was just the team. Reid stayed quiet, letting her talk through it. "I know Karen and Garcia are great with Henry and he's always with someone who loves him. Yet I couldn't help but feel guilty when I left him with Will. Now he's not even with him when I'm away. I just..."

Reid kissed the top of her head as he squeezed her closer. "Sometimes when I was little, I would load up a wagon with books and some food and go find a place away from everyone to be alone. It always started out as an attempt to run away from my life. After my dad left, I often felt that I had no family, no one that would miss me if I were gone. No one that loved me, even though intellectually I knew my mom did. When I would return home late at night, I would never know what kind of reaction I'd get. Sometimes, my mom would be happy I was back and those were the times I felt her love. Other times, she'd look at me like a stranger and I would feel like she would have never noticed if I hadn't come back."

He paused and shifted so he could look into her eyes. "You may leave Henry at times, but he is always with someone that loves him and he can feel that. Whether he's with biological family or family by choice, he knows he's wanted. That's the best gift you can give him, whether it's when you're holding him in your arms or a thousand miles away. Not every kid gets that."

JJ pulled him down and planted a soft kiss on his lips, earning some oohs from Garcia behind them. Not that either noticed her. "Thanks. I needed to hear that." She pushed some of his hair back from his face. "I hope you never plan on running away from your family now, from me."

He shook his head, "Never."

"Good, because I would definitely notice if you were gone." They kissed once more before being interrupted by Garcia moving to sit across from them.

"Well, now that we have some more time, are you two going to tell me about your fun in sin city?"

Reid rolled his eyes as JJ chuckled, resting her head on his shoulder. "We had a good visit with his mom is all Pen. I saw some adorable photos of baby Spence."

"Oh! Please tell me you made copies!" That got Emily to join them and Reid leaned back and groaned. JJ patted his arm before shaking her head no to the girls and getting sighs from them. He glanced at her and she winked, causing a soft smile to grace his features. He knew she had taken a few photos with her phone while they looked at the albums to share with Henry. "Oh well. Did anything else fun happen?" Garcia continued, wagging her eyebrows and getting the couple to laugh.

* * *

><p>"You ready to head out?" JJ asked. After landing, the team had headed back to the office for a few hours to wrap up paperwork. She was currently leaning against Reid's desk, ready to get home to Henry. Their talk helped, but she still felt a little bad about having just got him home and then going away on a case.<p>

Reid glanced up to the offices, noting the dim light from Morgan's. He usually tried to spend as much time as possible in the bullpen after Hotch took the team over, so he knew something was wrong. Not that he could blame the senior agent, but it worried him. Even Garcia showing up in person hadn't seemed to comfort the man he viewed as a big brother. He turned back to JJ.

JJ patted him on the shoulder, "Good luck. Let me know if I need to keep a plate of food warm." With that she headed out the door and left him deciding on how to approach his good friend. When he finally reached the office door, he found Morgan sitting on his couch, his head in his hands. Silently, he sat down next to him.

"You want to talk about it?" Reid asked, hoping he was doing the right thing. The doctor may have only told him that he needed to open up more to relieve stress, but he knew he wasn't the only team member that should be taking that advice. After what had happened with Emily and himself, it was time for the rest to work on this as well.

Morgan sighed and leaned back. "What's there to talk about? The fact that although we brought Cindi home, she will likely never trust anyone fully again? That she'll flinch when people try to embrace her? Or that Anthony never got a normal childhood? How do you think that little boy is going to turn out when he figures out something was very wrong with how he grew up?"

"Neither you or I had normal childhoods, but I think we turned out okay." Morgan turned to look at Reid. "Well, you did. I'm still a little different I guess." Reid smirked at his little joke and got a laugh out of Morgan.

"I think we're both a little different, but I appreciate what you're saying kid. Got anymore pearls of wisdom for me?"

Reid smiled softly and leaned back as well. "The human spirit is resilient. She'll have some adjustments to make, but I suspect Cindi will make it. She made it though all those years just to see Anthony for small periods of time. Now that she has him all the time, she has to be strong, to adjust. A mother's love is strong, fearless even."

Morgan looked at his young friend with gratitude, pulling him in a brief hug. When he let him go, he ruffled the genius' hair. "Thanks Reid." Reid nodded as he fixed his hair. "Sounds like you had a good visit with your mom."

Reid shrugged. "Yeah. She knew about JJ and I before I even said anything." He turned and met Morgan's eyes. He needed to talk to someone about his mother's note. Normally, he'd turn to Garcia but something told him she wouldn't be rational about it. "She left me my grandmother's engagement ring."

Morgan's eyebrows shot up. "Wow. Does JJ know?" Reid shook his head. "Do you want her to? Have you two even talked about that?"

Reid leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "No, we haven't. We're finally past, well, a lot of things. We're at a good place now. I don't want to rush things and scare her."

Morgan leaned forward as well. "Do you love her?"

"With all my heart."

"Then trust it. You'll know when the timing is right. For what it's worth, I'm sure she'll say yes when you do." Morgan patted Reid's shoulder. "Let's get out of here."


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: Thanks again for all the continued alerts, favorites, and reviews! They make this all worth while! ~Ann

* * *

><p>Reid closed his apartment door and headed to his bedroom to get some more clothes. Not only did he need to repack his ready bag after two back-to-back cases since returning from Chicago a few weeks ago, but he also needed to change out the collection of his clothes building at JJ's. He had basically been staying there full time since getting out of the hospital; even more so since they returned from Vegas. It was a glaring sign to him that the pair needed to talk about their future plans.<p>

He had found himself torn at times – he loved spending time with JJ and Henry and feeling like a family. However, for a man who grew up basically alone, he sometimes missed the solitude to collect his thoughts. He was grateful that JJ seemed to know him better than himself as she had been encouraging him to go for long walks by himself or taking Henry on a play date for 'mommy and son time' to allow him to sit and read a book alone. Those solutions were working temporarily, but they were likely going to need a better system as for the long term.

A soft knock on his front door pulled him away from his musings as he was unpacking his bag. When he opened it, he couldn't help but smile at the short elderly lady before him. "Good evening Mrs. Schmidt, how are you today?"

Resting her hand on her wooden can, the grayed haired lady smiled. "I'm still here, so that's something. How is my favorite tenant?" Reid moved out of the way to let her in. "Has the FBI been keeping you very busy lately, Dr. Reid? I feel like I've hardly seen you," she continued as she took a seat on his couch.

Reid smiled at his landlady's concern. He lived in the same apartment he had first found when he started training at Quantico when he was just past eighteen. She had seen how alone and insecure he was – and skinny, she liked to point that one out – so she had taken to checking in on him and bringing meals by on occasion. "It has, but that's not why I haven't been around much. I've been staying at my girlfriend's house a great deal."

"A girlfriend? Oh that is wonderful my dear Spencer. Well, then my visit is good timing, I suspect. I was coming by to check that you were renewing your lease again in a few months, but I'm guessing you might have different news for me." Mrs. Schmidt beamed, happy for the young man before her. She had worried about him so, particularly a few years back when he looked so sickly all the time. To see him so happy and healthy right now made her burst for joy.

Reid chuckled, "Wow, I hadn't even realized that it was that time of the year again. When do you need an answer by? I need to talk things over with JJ first."

Mrs. Schmidt smiled even wider, "JJ? As in your coworker and friend? That's your girlfriend?" Reid nodded and she pulled him into a hug before he could stop her. "Oh, my son, that's fantastic. I don't need to know your answer for another month so take your time and discuss. I have a feeling I will be sad to lose you but happy at the same time." She patted Reid's knee before standing up and heading towards the door.

Reid stood and followed, "Thanks, Mrs. Schmidt, I'll let you know soon. Thanks for stopping by." After Reid waved goodbye and shut the door, he leaned against it and sighed. Well, that just moved up the timetable on things a bit. He headed back to his bedroom to finishing packing, trying to figure out how to approach this topic with JJ.

* * *

><p>JJ sighed as she sat down at her desk in her home office. Well, that's what it was supposed to be, but she hardly used it. Partly because being back at the BAU meant she needed to keep those files from Henry. Some of the Pentagon work was easier to take home if needed without worrying he might accidently see a dead body. But mostly because she just wasn't home enough to use it for its purpose. It did offer some solitude, however, which she had for the moment. Reid was at a meeting and Henry finally went to bed. She enjoyed the quiet to decompress, but also knew she didn't need it as much as someone else.<p>

A soft knock on the doorframe pulled her back a little while later. She looked up and smiled at Reid. "You back already?"

Reid wrinkled his brow, "I've been gone an hour and a half, JJ. You okay?" He came in and leaned against the desk.

She nodded and took ahold of one of his hands. "Yeah, guess I just got lost in my thoughts."

He smiled as he studied their hands and then her face. "I think I have a penny on me, if you want."

She grinned. "Cute, but you can keep it. I was just wondering if you'd want to make this your office or library. I hardly use it anyway and it would give you some space for your books."

Reid blinked and a soft smile appeared on his face. "Jennifer Jareau, did you just ask me to move in with you?" She smiled back, realizing that she did, in fact, just ask that. She stood and wrapped her arms around his neck, her legs now between his.

"I think I did, Dr. Spencer Reid, so what do you think? Move in with us?" She shivered as his hands started to work their way up her back, underneath her shirt.

He kissed her softly. "Guess I have my answer for my landlady after all," he murmured before kissing her again. When they parted, she sent him a confused look. "I've been trying to figure out how to ask you for a week now. Mrs. Schmidt reminded me that my lease is up for renewal soon. I've been spending so much here…its not too soon, is it? It feels right to me, but I don't want to rush things either."

She smiled at his ramble and shook her head. "It feels right to me too, Spence. We're practically living together now as it is. We just need to finally move more of you into this place. Starting with this office. I doubt it will fit all of your books, but it's a start anyway. We can figure out the rest later." She continued to talk as he placed soft kisses on her neck. "We can even make a system with Henry that if you are in the office with the door closed he shouldn't interrupt you. I want you to have that time to yourself that you need."

Reid looked up and smiled. "Thank you. However, how about he just needs to knock? I won't be bringing any casework home, but sometimes my classes have material he shouldn't see. So knocking will give me a chance to hide it. If he needs me, I don't want him to think he can't come to me."

JJ nodded, sliding a hand down his chest before un-tucking his shirt and pulling his sweater off. "Whatever works for you. Now, what do you say to christening your new office?" Her hand moved lower, earning a moan from him as he picked her up and twirled them so he could occupy the now empty office chair.

"I like the way you think," he whispered into her ear before pulling her shirt over her head.

* * *

><p>"Did you ask yet?" JJ asked while walking by his desk the following Friday afternoon. Reid looked up from his file and frowned.<p>

"No, I got wrapped up in this consult and forgot."

"Ask what?" Emily interrupted from her desk. Morgan was leaning against his old desk and Garcia was just exiting the break room to join them.

"Oh am I missing something?" she teased, taking a sip. All eyes settled on the couple and JJ looked at her boyfriend.

Reid cleared his throat. "Are you guys busy this weekend? I need some help moving my stuff to JJ's house."

Jaws dropped and eyebrows went up as apparently no one was ready for that statement. Morgan was the first to recover. "My man! Moving in together? That's a big step." He pulled Reid into a guy hug and patted him on the back. "Of course I'll help you. Someone has to help you lug all those books around."

Reid shook his head with a smile, "Thanks Morgan." The girls were hugging JJ when Hotch cleared his throat from the walkway. The group looked up at the senior agent and Rossi also excited his office.

"I've got Jack's soccer game in the morning. Mind if Jack and Beth join moving day afterwards?" he asked with a small smile.

The whole group blinked and JJ recovered first. "Absolutely. Jack can play with Henry, and hopefully keep them from being underfoot too much."

"I'll show up at the end with wine and food," added Rossi before heading back into his office, getting chuckles from the rest. Reid and JJ exchanged smiles and she gently squeezed his hand before going back to her office to finish up for the day.

* * *

><p>Reid collapsed on their bed the next night with a groan. "Between moving furniture, the carbohydrate load from Rossi's pasta, and the wine, I could sleep all day tomorrow."<p>

JJ chuckled while lying down next to him. "Too bad Henry won't let that happen." She curled into his open arms. "I must say I'm impressed with how well our stuff blended." They had cleaned out what she didn't need from her office and replaced it with his office furniture, including several bookshelves that lined two of the walls. An additional bookshelf was added to the guest bedroom. JJ had already made more space for his clothes in the bedroom closet. Reid's favorite leather chair was added to the living room, moving JJ's existing chair to the den/play area.

The remaining of Reid's large furniture were either donated or dumped, as he wasn't really attached to any of it. They planned to set up the keyboard in the den for Henry to learn how to play. Some odds and ends like artwork were piled on the guest bed to be sorted through and of course Reid still needed to unpack all the books for those selves, but overall the pair was happy with the merge of their belongings.

Reid nodded in agreement, his eyes closed. "Maybe our furniture knew we belonged together before we did," he joked with a smile. He felt her smile as she kissed his cheek.

"Perhaps," she answered. "I'd still like for us to go shopping and pick a few things out together." Reid cracked open an eye, sending her a confused look. "A lot of these things, like this bedding, I picked out with Will. I want this to be completely our place, not you, me, and what's left of Will."

Reid pulled her to him, kissing her deeply. Once they separated, he pushed her hair back, running a hand down her cheek. "Okay, we'll go shopping. I don't know how much of an opinion I'll really have on some things since it's not my thing, but I'll help were I can."

JJ grinned and kissed him once more. "That works for me. We'll find something we'll both like, I know it. Now, how does a long hot bath sound?"


	25. Chapter 25

Reid groaned after landing on the floor mat. The pain he felt was ignored when he heard Morgan's chuckle from above. He glanced up and realized the senior agent was within kicking distance and not looking at the younger agent. Using a sweeping motion, he knocked Morgan off his feet and laughed when he heard a grunt after he older man landed on his back.

"Damn kid, that was just uncalled for," Morgan groaned.

Reid chuckled, "Weren't you the one that just said we should be prepared for any move? That unsub's don't play by a playbook?"

Morgan jokingly shoved Reid's arm before the pair started to get back to their feet. "Nice to see you've been listening during these lessons." This was the seventh sparing lesson Reid had agreed to since getting out of the hospital. He decided that although he wasn't typically the one tackling unsubs, he needed to be better prepared. His close call with the fight for his gun a few months ago showed him that. Besides, if nothing else, it relieved some stress and put JJ's mind more at ease.

"Now," Morgan continued, pulling Reid's focus back. "Let's try it again. Pretty soon you'll be ready to take on JJ."

* * *

><p>"Mmmm, here comes the yummy muscle men of the BAU," teased Garcia when the two joined the team in the break room a few hours later. Morgan grinned and Reid just rolled his eyes. "Looking good, dear doctor."<p>

JJ nodded in agreement and handed Reid his tea. "Can't argue with her on that one."

Reid blushed, "thanks." He took a sip of his tea and headed to his desk. JJ smiled at the extra bounce in his step as he left. She wondered if he noticed the improvement in his self-confidence that she had since he'd been working out more. He would never get like Morgan, he needed to keep his mind more engaged than his body. Yet, she wondered if he had noticed the more looks he was getting when they were out –like she was. She wasn't at all worried, but it did amuse her how it seemed to help his confidence, whether he noticed it or not.

"Your boy genius has a little extra pep in his giddy up, doesn't he?" Garcia commented, gently shoulder bumping JJ. JJ smiled as she took a sip of her own tea and headed to her office to work on a few things before the team headed to Georgetown for their presentation on Thomas Yates.

* * *

><p>Reid looked up from his philosophy textbook when he heard an interesting knock on his home office's door. He smiled at that thought, 'home office.' He liked the sound of that. "Come in."<p>

Henry stuck his head in, "Spence, mommy wanted me to get you for dinner." Reid smiled. He had noticed of late that 'uncle' had starting to be dropped more and more often. He knew eventually there going to have to have the 'step dad' talk if…when he proposed and she accepted. He currently had that ring tucked away in a desk drawer, waiting for when the time was right.

"Thanks little man, I was getting hungry," he answered, tucking a bookmark into his textbook and closing it. He stood and quickly scooped up Henry into his arms. "Umph," he fake grunted, "you're getting big Henry. Must be all that mac and cheese we've been eating lately." He tickled the young boy and was treated to laughter as they headed down the stairs. "Hey JJ, what's for dinner?"

She turned to him after setting plates on the table. "I'll let you guess," she joked. Reid looked down at the plates and noticed the familiar food. "I added grilled chicken and mixed vegetables to balance it out. A certain little boy has to clean those up before getting a second serving," she added as she kissed Henry on the top of his head after Reid set him in his chair. The emerging family enjoyed their dinner while Henry regaled them with his adventures at pre-school.

"And blue is azul and red is rojo!" he finished, very proud of himself for remembering his colors in Spanish.

"Wow Henry, that was amazing!" JJ beamed. Reid nodded as well, impressed with Henry's memory capability.

"That's great little man. Sounds like you're learning at lot at school. I think that might merit a treat tonight, don't you?"

"Yeah! Ice cream!" Henry exclaimed. JJ glared at Reid briefly before looking back at the boy.

"I suppose we can do that if you finish your vegetables," she replied. Henry groaned but picked up a piece of broccoli. "You too Henry," she added, gently shoving Reid's arm.

Henry giggled, "Yeah, Spence, we need to eat our veggies!"

Reid laughed and ate a piece of cauliflower. Glancing at JJ, he commented, "I can't believe you turned him against me."

"The power of ice cream," she smiled.

* * *

><p>JJ curled into Reid's side a few hours later after tucking Henry in and finishing up a few household items. Reid was already starting to doze off but wrapped an arm around her. "Have you noticed that Henry has stopped calling you uncle?" He nodded a little while keeping his eyes closed.<p>

"Will make things easier when we get married," he sighed dreamily.

JJ froze, her eyes wide. Did he really just say that? Did he realize he said that? She sat up, letting his arm drop onto the bed. "What did you say?"

Reid rolled to his side, "Night JJ, love you."

She leaned over him, watching as his breathing continued to even out. Did he really just say that half asleep? "Love you too Spence." She bit her lip and giggled softly. Lying back down, she wondered how she was going to get any sleep now. He was going to propose! She had wondered about that, but kept it in the back of her mind. She figured it was a long way down the road given recent events. Although, really, one could say they had been together in some form for years now. She just hadn't expected he would even be thinking about it yet.

Watching her parents' marriage dissolve over her sister's suicide, she had sworn for years that she would never get married. At the time, she never thought she would meet someone she thought would be strong enough to handle whatever life could throw at them. But Spence was the strongest man she knew. If he could handle what life had thrown at him so far on his own, she knew she could be strong enough to handle things as well.

It was one of the reasons she kept going to sparing seasons with Morgan. Not only just for her safety in the field, but it helped keep her fighter spirit going, something she could admit she didn't really have years ago, before Henry. But now she had a reason to fight, well, two actually. She vaguely wondered if he felt that way when he was sparing now, if that's why it's made him more confident.

Whatever the reason, she loved the change and couldn't wait see what else their future held. With that thought, she smiled once more before turning on her side and drifting off to sleep.

* * *

><p>JJ grinned at the look on Reid's face. She had arranged for Henry to spend the night at Karen's house so they could have their first night alone in the house since he had moved in. She had picked up some take out and arranged the living room as a little picnic as a little surprise.<p>

"What is this?" he asked, setting his messenger bag on the table by the door. JJ answered by meeting him, wrapping her arms around his neck and planting a soft kiss on his lips.

"Henry is sleeping over at Karen's. We have been going basically non-stop since you got out the hospital. Between working on life changes, work, and moving in, we really haven't had a night to just relax. So I thought we could have a little date night."

Reid smiled and pulled her close. "That sounds fantastic." They kissed once more before JJ led him to the picnic area and food. When he stared at the Chinese food he chuckled. "Your idea for relaxing was to torture me with chopsticks?"

JJ giggled. "I can get you a fork if you want, but I did pick these up too." She handed him a pair of chopsticks that had an M connecting the sticks. He studied them for a minute, squeezing them, and then smiled. She watched as he pinched some food and ate it. "Good?"

He smiled and nodded. "I suppose it will work," he teased. "Although if it doesn't, will you just feed me?"

JJ outright laughed and shoved him. "Don't make me beat you."

"Oh you could try," he joked back.

JJ raised an eyebrow. "Is that a challenge, Doctor Reid? Want to have a sparring session in the living room?"

"Maaaybe," he answered, wagging his eyebrows and sending her heart aflutter. She felt him take her food away and set it down before planting a kiss on her pulse point.

"Spence," she breathed as he gently pushed her down onto the floor full of pillows.

* * *

><p>AN: Yay, we've finally reached the point right before the finale last season. The next few chapters are with my beta so should be coming soon. Also, they are a bit longer than others since there was so much to put in. Hope you like where we're at and are ready for my take on Hit & Run! ~Ann


	26. Chapter 26

JJ groaned, waking up when Reid started to get out of the bed the next morning. "Why do you have to get up so early on a Saturday?" She tried to pull him back into bed, almost succeeding with her kisses.

Reid moaned but pulled back, "Detective Rodriguez will be by to pick me up in a hour. I agreed to give a group of detectives at the 63rd a brief profiling class." JJ nodded, remembering when he told her about it after a Beltway Cops meeting. He had become friends with a few of the detectives and even though there were no full names or badge numbers exchanged, his skill set still came up and he agreed to go over a few basic topics before their shift got too busy.

"Right. So you'll meet up with Henry and I at the park later? He wants to show off his soccer skills for you." Reid nodded as he headed into the bathroom to get ready. JJ smiled softly at the view of her guy walking away in his boxers and suddenly didn't feel tired anymore. She couldn't contain the bubble of laughter that escaped when he jumped after she hopped in the shower with him. Later when he was finishing getting dressed and she was back in her pajamas but with wet hair, she realized just how much happier he had made her over this past nine months.

She hugged him, catching him off guard. "I love you." Reid looked down at her and smiled, pulling her in for another kiss.

"I love you too." As they kissed once more, Reid knew it in his heart that they were ready. The timing wasn't right for this moment, but some day soon. JJ walked him downstairs to the door, knowing Karen was bringing Henry back soon.

"Mommy! Pence! Let's play!" Henry came running into the house and the adults laughed, as if he had known JJ was thinking about him. They could vaguely hear Karen yell 'sorry' from next door.

"I have to go to a meeting for awhile today, but I'll play later okay buddy?" Henry nodded and Reid bent down to kiss the top of his head. "I better get going. Love you."

"Love you!" Henry shouted and JJ smiled as Reid waved before heading out the door.

* * *

><p>"All units in the area of 10 and Southeast, robbery in progress at Colonial Liberty Bank. Shots fired."<p>

Reid glanced over at Detective Rodriguez as she spoke. "That's one block over. You okay if we delay the class?"

Reid nodded, "As long as you have another vest for me." She nodded; gesturing behind her where he found one and started to strap it on.

"426 Responding. I have an FBI agent Dr. Reid with me." She turned on the sirens as Reid adjusted his vest. The pair pulled up to the side of the building. He got out, glancing around when Rodriguez got out. "We better pull back and see..." Suddenly her head fell back and he ran behind the car, managing to take two shots and hit one of the robbers. He noticed the two of them go back inside as he reached for the radio.

"Officer down. Shots fired, I repeat shots fired," he all but yelled into the radio. He sat on the curb behind the car, barely able to glance at his fallen friend. After a second, he dug out his phone and called Hotch.

* * *

><p>JJ all but ran out of the SUV and dived into his arms, not caring for a moment that more than just the team was around. "Are you okay?"<p>

Reid hugged her tightly. "I'm okay, I'm okay." He pulled back, kissing her forehead before turning to the team. The pair turned back into their work modes as soon as they separated.

"What were you doing here in the first place?" asked Morgan.

"I was helping out friend, about to give her and some other detectives a brief profiling class." Reid sighed. "Now I get to tell her three kids that their mom isn't coming home tonight." Emily squeezed his shoulder as he turned to Hotch. "It was definitely them. I saw the Jack and the King, but the Queen has to be inside as well." The rest of the team looked at between the pair, confused. "I did the original consult and talked to Hotch about taking the case."

"Media is calling them the Face Cards. They've robbed seven banks in seven months. They've killed one person at each robbery with a single gun shot wound, where they bleed out." Hotch answered as the group headed to the command center.

"Wait, serial killers with a thirty day cooling off period and we're only just hearing about this now?" Emily was astonished.

Hotch shrugged. "Reid gave them a preliminary profile. Headquarters always viewed them as robbers first, murderers second. When I saw his profile, I tried to change their minds, but was overruled."

Rossi shook his head, "So why are we here now?"

"Because crisis negotiation is overseas."

JJ looked between Hotch and Reid. "What more do we know about them?"

Reid answered as Hotch continued to lead them to the command center. "They're efficient, organized. Each strike takes only two minutes. They are clearly scouting the banks beforehand." They climbed into the bus to find Garcia.

"Before you even ask, we can't identify them because they hack the security feed both before the initial canvas and during the robbery. Only once the masks come back are on is it resumed and we're allowed to watch," answered Hotch as the group looked at the monitors. The team continued to discuss the case as the watched the group of robbers.

"The face card masks add to their narcissism. Their personas are as the royalty of poker." Reid added, seeing an old file come to life on the screen.

"JJ, Prentiss, Reid, look at past robberies to compile a more detailed victimology than Reid's initial consult. Do you remember your report?" Hotch asked Reid. Reid nodded as the group started to separate. Reid waited for JJ to pass him and felt her give him a soft hand squeeze as she did.

* * *

><p>Reid was studying the files and video feed, trying to figure out what he'd missed in the original profile. He was also trying to push down the guilt he was feeling. Guilt over losing Rodriguez. Guilt for the four people that had been shot since he'd shot Oliver. Rossi speaking through the speaker phone pulled him back.<p>

"What if the smaller banks were training runs for the Straten brothers?"

Morgan added, "Well, they could be. She took two relatively amateur thugs and made them elite bank robbers."

Emily was walking around the room. "But why? To turn them into patsies?"

"So let's think about this. Until now, they have been highly organized. Striking banks only on deposit days when the largest amount of cash is on hand." JJ stated.

Reid's wheels were starting to spin. "But today was different. It was the first Saturday they hit, where there are more families and higher foot traffic. It's clearly risker. It doesn't help that the media is now involved, it's the first time they've had an audience."

Emily shook her head, "That might be why the female is so vain, she wants to look good for the cameras. She walks around without really looking for a way out, like she's enjoying the situation."

"We know the brothers are in it for the money, what's she in it for?" asked Hotch.

Reid frowned, running a hand through his hair. JJ and Emily both glanced at him. "What's wrong Spence?"

He shook his head. "Something's not sitting right with me. Garcia, have you looked into how the police got the call. Even if someone triggered the alarm when the robbery started, our response time was almost too fast."

"On it, boy wonder," Garcia replied.

"Guys, Reid was on to something. 911 was notified of the robbery by a text message from a phone in the bank. It was received thirty seconds before the crew even blacked out the security footage." Garcia notified Hotch, Morgan, and Rossi.

"So one of the robbers called it in? Why?" asked Morgan.

Hotch sighed, "She wanted us here."

* * *

><p>As Reid climbed out on the SUV to rejoin the team, he had a sinking feeling in his stomach. JJ looked over and saw his frown. "Hey, it's going to be okay," she offered.<p>

He nodded and squeezed her hand. "I love you."

JJ wrinkled her brow. "I love you too Spence."

They reached the command center just in time to hear the end of Rossi's phone call with the King. "I want to talk to the cop who shot my brother."

The whole group in the bus looked at Reid, panicked. He sighed and nodded, for some reason he'd sensed this coming. He took off the vest he was wearing, it was still the police issue one. He started to unbutton his sweater as the group just watched.

JJ looked around, how was on one else stopping this. "No. Absolutely not Spence. And what are you doing?"

Reid looked at her as he started to put the vest back on over his shirt. "JJ, if it means we can end this. Besides, he doesn't know I'm with the FBI or a profiler. I can use this to our advantage. There is a chance that fourth partner is in there as well." He pulled the vest tight before putting the sweater back on to conceal it.

"What makes you think he won't shoot you the minute you walk through the doors?" she asked, trying to stay calm, rational.

"He wants out of there just as much as we want him out."

JJ shook her head. "It's not happening, forget it."

Hotch studied the man he'd come to view as a younger brother. "You know there is no guarantee that he won't retaliate for the death of his brother."

Reid glanced at Morgan. "I know you'd do it if you were me."

Morgan sighed. "Reid, I know what you're feeling. But you're too close to this case to make that call. Plus you have a family to think about too."

Reid nodded. "You're damn right I'm close. Michelle was a friend, I tried to help her. Now four people are dead because I shot his brother. No one else needs to die because of what I did. Besides, we need to get inside there, to really understand their dynamic. I'm the one that knows the most about this case; I did the first profile." He stood and turned to JJ. "I can do this, JJ. I need to."

JJ took his hands. "Spencer, risking your life won't bring those people back. Please don't do this."

Hotch shook his head. "Sorry Reid, but I can't approve of this."

Emily rushed into the room. "He's threatening to shoot a hostage very sixty seconds unless he get's Reid." Reid started to move when Hotch stopped him.

"It's time we go in." The group scattered to prepare for swat. It was only after JJ looked up from the bank's floor plans that she noticed Reid walking towards the door.

"What is he doing?" The rest immediately saw what she did and Morgan grabbed her, keeping her back. "Let me go Morgan, let me go! Reid! Reid! Spence!"

Reid tried to push out her cries, hoping to have a chance to make this up to her someday. He knew he had promised to not put himself in danger willingly again, but he had to stop this. Something told him he needed to be inside to understand what the bigger picture for the female unsub and the mystery one was. Plus he couldn't have any more blood on his hands. He held his hands up as he slowly opened the front door.

He first noticed the Queen notice him and a smile creep across her face as she informed the King. He came running over to him with the gun pointed right at him. "What's your name?"

"Let these people go." He was grateful to see three be released before dealing with the question at hand. "I'm Spencer Reid, MPD," he lied, not wanting to give anything away. He noticed the Queen grab her iPad right beforehand.

JJ screamed when she heard two shots fired, nearly collapsing to the ground beside Morgan and Prentiss.

"No! No! No!"


	27. Chapter 27

_A/N: Glad you're liking my take on Hit & Run! Here's the second part!_

* * *

><p>JJ stared at the floor of the command center, trying to calm her breathing. She could feel the rest of the team watching her and hear Garcia sniff, trying to hold back tears. "Did you see where he was shot?"<p>

Garcia wiped away a tear. "No."

"He was wearing his vest underneath the sweater, he might be okay," Prentiss offered, trying to not think about this team having to bury another member. For real this time.

A crackle of sound came through their earpieces. A groan of pain. JJ inhaled, not sure she could listen to this. The rest were impressed that he hadn't taken out his earpiece and mic and that they still appeared to be working.

"Whoa, whoa, keep the pressure. The pain won't kill him but the loss of blood could. Hang in there buddy. Are you armed?" The group waited to hear the answer.

Reid groaned. "No." The group took a collective sigh of relief when they heard Reid speak, but concerned when they realized he wasn't armed.

"Damn. I think we might have something of a chance here."

Reid tried to focus and push the pain from his shoulder out of his mind. He studied the hostage that came to his aid, trying to not act any different. He seemed far too calm and not scared of the female when she confronted him a few minutes ago. He only hoped the team could hear him, his long hair was useful at disguising his earpiece. "What?"

"The girl is gone, the guy is off his end."

Reid nodded, already knowing this before coming in. "He doesn't know who to trust. We can work them against each other." The man nodded. "Are you a cop?"

"Former Marine." Reid rested his head back down, praying Garcia could piece things together. He wasn't sure he trusted this guy, but right now he didn't have a choice.

"I need you to get a message to my girlfriend," Reid sighed, a horrible feeling sinking in his stomach. He was about to add Henry, but something made him keep that inside.

The man shook his head, "You can tell her yourself when we get out of here."

Reid groaned, sitting up. "Except we need a distraction. Please tell her I'm sorry I couldn't keep my promise." Reid noticed him nod as he headed over to Chris. He wished he could figure out the end game here; something didn't feel right.

* * *

><p>JJ stared at Morgan, trying to shake off the ringing in her ears. After a second, everything connected in her shocked brain when she noticed the smoke behind him. "Spence. Did Spence get out?" Without thinking, she ran into the shattered bank.<p>

"JJ!"

The pair combed the bank, finding a few survivors and some that were not. After finding Emily, she returned her focus to finding him. She needed to, she just…had to. Her heart was pounding as she wandered the dark tunnels with Morgan. She couldn't handle the thoughts in the back of her mind. What if…

The pair burst through the doors into the alley. She glanced around a breathed a little, a brief moment of relief. She ran over to the trashcan. "What is it JJ?"

She held up the smashed earpiece and mic. "He's alive." She hugged the gold piece to her heart for a minute before showing Morgan. "He left a breadcrumb." She opened the pocket watch and ran a finger over their photo. "I don't get it. They shot him, why take him with?"

"He's alive, that's the good thing JJ."

She shook her head. "Yeah, but they took him. Who knows why or where, how is that good?" A million thoughts ran through her head now knowing they had taken him. One stood out – why did he choose the watch?

* * *

><p>Reid bit back a groan in the back seat of the SUV, praying that the team was okay. He had connected the Queen's movements in the back of the bank too late. Now he was watching the pair as they drove off in a government looking SUV, something that concerned him. What did she have planned that she had this prepared? Did that marine help her? He watched as the pair started to argue; now learning her name was Izzy. Clearly the seed of doubt they had planted was starting to work.<p>

"So then let me kill him and get on with this." Reid pulled back into the conversation with that statement. He held a breath, watching her answer.

"No, we need him. For leverage." She sent a glance back at him and Reid kept his face expressionless. "We need to patch him up."

Reid's head was spinning, trying to figure out what the plan was. Clearly, she was going to meet up with whoever the partner was and he was pretty sure he knew who. Something just didn't fit with how the marine had been acting in the bank. Even for a trained solider, he was far too calm. But after they met, was the goal then? The joy she got watching herself on the iPad meant she loved watching the chaos she's causing and would want to cause even more. But what? He didn't know why, but his gut told him Union Station, it was why he left the watch. He only hoped that he was right and that JJ figured it out in time.

* * *

><p>JJ listened to the team as they worked though the profile of Lady X. The main thing she focused on was that whatever her and her partner's plan was, it was far from over and the bank was just the tip of the iceberg. What did they need Reid for? She glanced at Garcia and then at the table in the corner of the command center.<p>

"What the?" She pushed past the rest of the team to find Reid's badge, gun and ID. Emily was the first to notice what she was holding.

"I get the gun, but what would he leave his gun and ID?" The group looked at each other, trying to piece together what the youngest team member had planned before going into the bank.

"Chris said he wanted to see the cop that shot his brother. He doesn't know that Reid is FBI," stated Rossi.

"Garcia, get in touch with the coroner for the PD. Check if the cop Reid was with still has her badge," continued Hotch.

"Rodriguez, she was with the 63rd," added JJ, connecting the dots. "He figured Lady X would know the difference between the badges and didn't want to take a chance."

Morgan smiled briefly, "He's also giving as a way to track him if they make him flash his badge. Garcia, can you send his photo to all the uniform officers? Tell them if they see him and he identifies himself as a cop, to let us know? Let him through, don't try to stop them, but then notify us." Garcia nodded and got to work while Morgan turned to the rest. "That's why she needs him. She wants to use him as a way to get somewhere that's highly patrolled due to the mess."

Kevin looked up from the computer, "We just got word of a firefighter killed at his station ten blocks from here." The group sighed as JJ took lead to investigate, Rossi right behind her.

* * *

><p>Reid was struggling to keep his cool as he slid into the drivers seat after Izzy wiped Chris' blood off the seat. He figured she'd eventually kill him, but it was still surprising. He schooled his expression to continue to look stunned with the marine climbed into the back seat.<p>

"Hello Spencer. I guess you actually won't be able to your girl your message yourself." Reid kept still as Izzy passed a gun back to him and then exited the car, climbing in the back. Before he could quite figure out what they were up to, the marine was next to him. "Drive."

"Where?"

"Union Station." Reid stared at him, almost surprised that he guessed right. "I know what you're thinking, don't believe that hype that you can be the hero. Don't think we can't find out more about that girlfriend of yours, make her pay if you do something stupid." Reid swallowed, hoping that his breadcrumbs worked.

* * *

><p>JJ stared at the pocket watch, rubbing her fingers over the engraving. Closing it, she kept turning it over in her hands. "Why the watch Rossi? He could have left his wallet or his one-year medallion. Knowing Spence, this choice has to mean something."<p>

Rossi glanced at her as he drove and they talked with the team. "It must be a message to you, something deeper. Any of us could have identified the items as his you listed. But the watch was something you gave him. Think about it."

JJ rubbed her eyes, thinking about the watch. When she gave it to him at Christmas on the couch. Or the first time he wore it after the team found out, how Emily questioned him about it and the smile on his face when he showed her the photos inside. Or after Henry watched a show about trains, he started… Her eyes shot open. "Union Station."

Rossi sent her a look as Hotch spoke. "What? How can you be sure?"

"Spence and Henry watched a special about trains about two months ago. Henry noticed the conductors wearing pocket watches and started to call Spence one whenever he wore it. He loved it and even told Henry we'd take a train ride soon at Union Station." She paused, noticing Rossi nod. "Hotch, they are going to blow up Union Station."

Hotch sighed. "JJ, I appreciate your insight but I need more to go on before we all head there."

"Did anyone else notice the dates? Dowd was dishonorably discharged in 2004, there was the unrest issues in Chad in 2008, and now its 2012. Perhaps there's something to this date specifically. They've done all this detailed planning, why wouldn't they make it significant to them as a couple?" The group nodded at Emily's comments. "Garcia, did something happen this day in Chad in 2008?"

"Good call, my girl. There were multiple explosions this day four years ago in Chad," Garcia answered while typing away.

"What had the highest body count?" Rossi asked.

"A church…no, a train."

Rossi started to accelerate and JJ commented. "Union Station."

Kevin added, "We just got a call from an officer there with someone meets Reid's description." The group exchanged quick glances before running to a waiting SUV.

* * *

><p>Reid pulled up outside Union Station and noticed the uniform cops. He held his breath, hoping they wouldn't question him. He rolled down his window and nodded.<p>

"Detective," he nodded, noting the badge around Reid's neck. Reid held in the sigh of relief.

"You on lock down?" he asked.

"No, just diverting traffic. Official vehicles only," the young cop replied.

"We're just here to do a sweep." Reid watched as he glanced at the pair and then let them through. Izzy climbed back into the back seat now that they were past the stop. Glancing in his rearview mirror, he noticed the cop on his radio. He prayed it was the message he wanted it to be.

They pulled up on a side entrance and the pair kissed while both pointed a gun at Reid. They then climbed in and Izzy went a separate way from them. He tried to fight him when they went into the bathroom, but the wound only gave him one good arm. "Tisk, tisk, Spencer, I thought you knew better than that." Reid groaned when the gun hit him on the side of his head. "Come on."

* * *

><p>JJ and Rossi split up, looking over the crowd. She was trying not to panic every minute that went by when she didn't see anything. Morgan radioed that they were just about to pull up when she decided to check the restrooms. With her gun raised, she slowly pushed the door open, trying to not make a sound. She heard a few footsteps and then they stopped. Quickly, she pushed it all the way open and was eye to eye with the woman that was responsible for her Spence getting shot. She also had a gun pointed back at her.<p>

"Where is Spencer?" She kept her voice even and didn't even blink, not about to give her an inch.

Izzy smirked, "Well I see our detective failed to mention his girlfriend was with the FBI. That will make this all the more fun." JJ noticed her gaze shift, trying to find where to shoot her since JJ's vest took away her favorite spot. It was all the distraction JJ needed as she quickly roundhouse kicked the gun out of her hand. But it wasn't enough to knock Izzy off her feet and she charged JJ, also knocking her gun down. The pair wrestled on the ground, Izzy getting a kick to JJ's stomach. She stood up, running for a gun, when JJ pushed her into the countertops, smacking her head into the granite.

Izzy's unconscious body fell to the ground at JJ's feet. She quickly grabbed her gun and Izzy's, tucking in in her belt before checking the bathroom, finding only an empty bag. It was only then that Morgan in her ear registered, "I've got the suspect going down the east side."

"Guys, I've got Lady X in the women's restroom on the west side." She radioed as she bent down to cuff her. "Please tell me someone's got Spence."

"JJ, he's with me and he's…" Emily paused. Rossi found JJ and pulled Izzy to her feet.

"He's what, Emily?"

"Rigged with the explosions. Reid, what?" JJ heard muffled sounds and then Spence's voice in her ears.

"Jennifer, I don't think we're going to get this disarmed in time. Please get out of here; Henry needs his mother. I love you both too much for him to grow up like I did. Please." JJ hadn't even notice Rossi slowly escorting her out of the building when some uniforms collected Izzy from them.

She couldn't keep the tears from falling. "I love you too, baby, so much. Please, we can figure how to disarm this. Let's think, everything about today was about them."

"They're narcissists," he added, thinking about his time with them. "But in love in their own twisted way." JJ could hear Emily in the background as they worked through the options. "Izzy, her name is Izzy." Her breath was in her throat when she heard Emily swear. Time froze until she heard a sigh escape his mouth.

"Spence? Talk to me."

"It's okay, we're going to be okay. Although I still need bomb squad to take this off of me. I love you JJ. I'm so sorry." He let out a shaky breath and she leaned on the police car, barely noticing Morgan and Hotch coming down the street.

"I love you too." She slid down the side of the car and just tried to breathe until she could see him, since she was banned from going back in until it was cleared. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she was climbing into an ambulance with him. Neither of them noticed Rossi or the rest of the team standing at the edge of the bus as they shared a long kiss.

Reid held her close, kissing her once more before taking her hand in his. "I was so afraid I wasn't going to see you again, JJ. But please know I did what I had to, I felt it was the only way to figure-"

JJ cut him off with a kiss. "Ask me Spence," she smiled as happy tears ran down her face. Both knew exactly what she was talking about. She couldn't go another moment without being with him for eternity.

The grin on his face could have lit up a room. "Jennifer Jareau, will you marry me?"


	28. Chapter 28

Reid and JJ stared at Henry asleep in bed that night, grateful to be able to come home to him and each other. Finally she closed the door and he tugged on her hand with his good arm. "Come on, I've got something for you." He led her into their bedroom and they sat down on the bed. He dug out the box from his pocket; having grabbed it from his desk while Henry was in the bath with her. She smiled as he gave her the box and she opened it, gasping.

"Oh Spence, its beautiful." She slid it on her ring finger and sighed happily. "It's perfect."

Reid smiled. "It was my grandmother's. My mom gave it to me during our visit, apparently she saw right through us. I had it resized a few weeks ago. I even found wedding bands that I have on hold."

JJ raised an eyebrow, "Do you now? So sure I'd say yes?" She teased him before wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him.

"I calculated a high probability of it going in my favor," he teased back, pulling her to him. She giggled into their kiss until he started to kiss down her neck, when it suddenly wasn't so funny anymore.

* * *

><p>"Wow, someone sure does know who to throw a party. You don't mess around," JJ joked, looking around the beautifully decorated backyard before hugging Rossi.<p>

Reid nervously chuckled beside her, hoping she liked the idea Rossi cooked up. He had talked to Reid briefly about it after he had been checked out at the hospital and JJ had stepped out to give her official statement. He knew neither of them wanted to wait or do anything big and fancy. He didn't know if she would have wanted her whole family there or not and Rossi could only get her mom here. He was just glad he already had those bands picked out and that Morgan could pick them up today just in case.

"What can I tell ya, I'm the host with the most," Rossi laughed back.

"No kidding," JJ answered and Reid smiled back at her.

"Hey, look who's here," Rossi continued and Reid watched JJ's face light up and get confused at the same time.

"Mom? What is going on here?" JJ looked at Reid, then Rossi, then her mom, and finally back to Reid.

"Well, I couldn't help but overhear a certain question get asked yesterday," supplied Rossi.

Reid squeezed her hand. "I figured with all that happened, we wouldn't want to wait. But I didn't want your mom not to be here. So when Dave presented me with his idea, I couldn't help but agree with it." He paused and ran a hand down one of her arms. "If you don't want to, this can just be an engagement party. It's up to you."

JJ smiled and kissed him softly. "I love it. But what about your mom? I would hate for her to miss this too."

Reid smiled. "Garcia has set up a bunch of cameras around and is taping it. She'll make a video for her and we'll watch it with her and share some photos. She's terrified to fly, so this is for the best. She wouldn't want us to wait on her account."

JJ nodded in agreement. "Okay, I'm in." She kissed him once more. "Well, now I know why you two got so dressed up."

"You will be too," JJ's mom added. "I brought something borrowed should you want to wear it."

"Is that your dress?" Her mom nodded and JJ beamed as the pair headed upstairs.

* * *

><p>Reid let out a deep breath as he watched Henry run over to Garcia who had his jacket and tie that Reid had hidden in the car. Rossi chuckled as he looked at the senior agent. "You nervous?"<p>

Reid smiled and shook his head. "Only if she doesn't come back down." Rossi patted him on the shoulders as Morgan came with his change of clothes. He excused himself into the downstairs bathroom and changed into his suit and fixed his hair some. Then he waited with Henry and the preacher, playing magic tricks with the rings to keep Henry amused and occupied. It also kept him from thinking about the butterflies in his stomach. Only when he heard Garcia gasp and then start to play some soft music did he look up. What he saw took his breath away.

JJ looked radiant in an elegant white dress that hugged her curves in all the right places. Loose sleeves draped off her shoulders and her hair had gentle curls framing her face. He had always found her stunning, but in this moment, when her blue eyes were smiling just as brightly as the rest of her and he knew it was just for him, topped them all. Nothing at that instant could take away the large smile on his face either.

When she came to stand next to him and take his hands after kissing Henry in front of him, his heart skipped a beat. "You look stunning," he whispered.

"You too," she whispered back before the pair turned to the preacher.

"Life is precious and spectacular, although everyone here knows it can be fleeting as well. Love is what makes life worth the pain that can come with it at times; love is what makes us strong. Love is what brings us here tonight," the preacher started before nodding to Reid.

Reid took a deep breath. "I think everyone here can testify to the fact that I work best with statistics." A few chuckles came from the team. "When I looked at my life a year ago I would have found it statistically improbable that I would be standing here tonight. I have never been so grateful for math to fail me." JJ grinned widely at that.

"Sometimes it feels like a dream that I'm in a relationship, that I'm about to marry, the woman who caused me to spill coffee on myself the first day she started at the BAU because I was stuttering so much. I know it's not a dream that I'm in love with my best friend, however, because the whole team could also testify to the fact that I fell about five minutes after that coffee stained my shirt."

He paused and squeezed JJ's hands again. "Jennifer, I love and trust you will all my heart. I know we still have so much to learn from each other and I don't expect this relationship to be perfect. But I do know that we can make it be as close to perfection as possible because we're both willing to fight for our relationship and for each other. I promise to spend the rest of these days together fighting for that perfection."

JJ smiled as Reid reached up, wiping away a few tears that fell from her eyes. "Wow, how does a girl follow that?" They barely registered the chuckles from the group behind them. "Spence, my sweet Spence. Did you know that years ago Gideon told me that I was the only one who ever called you that?" Reid chuckled and shook his head. "When he did, I knew I had to keep that nickname for just us, it just feels so right. If it makes you feel any better, I felt the same way after we met, I was just able to hide it better. Something immediately drew me to you, even though we had to take a long journey to get us to this point today."

"I will forever be grateful for that journey because it allowed both of us to grow as individuals so we would be strong enough to handle whatever the world wants to throw at us." She paused and he nodded in understanding, knowing she was implying not only yesterday, but their talk in Vegas. "I love you so much. I love your smile, your sweetness, your genius – yes, even your statistics – how perfect you are with Henry. I can only hope to show you how much you mean to me every day of my life by showing you kindness, compassion, respect, understanding, and of course love." It was her turn to wipe away a stray tear from his face.

The pair softly exchanged I do's as they slide on their rings. They barely registered the cheers from the team when they kissed. "I love you, Mrs. Reid," he teased, kissing her again.

"I love you, Mr. Jareau," she teased back and kissed him once more. Reid laughed as he scooped up Henry with his good arm and they each kissed him on the cheek.

* * *

><p>Reid pulled JJ into his arms for their first dance and nodded to Garcia to start the music. He had picked a song from JJ's iPod that spoke to him. It seemed quite fitting for the two of them. As a guitar started to softly strum, she met his eyes and smiled. "Perfect."<p>

_When I look into your eyes  
>It's like watching the night sky<br>Or a beautiful sunrise  
>There's so much they hold<br>And just like them old stars  
>I see that you've come so far<br>To be right where you are  
>How old is your soul?<br>_

Reid spun JJ as the chorus started. They didn't notice the tears falling from Garcia and Emily's eyes or Morgan's nod in approval.

_I won't give up on us  
>Even if the skies get rough<br>I'm giving you all my love  
>I'm still looking up<br>_

JJ leaned her head on Reid's shoulder, angling herself so he could hear her sing along. _"And when you're needing your space to do some navigating. I'll be here patiently waiting to see what you find."_

Reid kissed the hand he held in his as they swayed together to the words that seemed to fit them so well. When he found the part that made him choose the song, it was his turn to whisper in her ear. _"And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend for us to work. We didn't break; we didn't burn. We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in. I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am."  
><em>  
>JJ looked up and kissed him deeply before resting her forehead against his. They became completely lost in each other's embrace as the last of the song washed over them.<p>

_I won't give up on us - no I'm not giving up  
>God knows I'm tough enough - I am tough, I am loved<br>We've got a lot to learn - we're alive, we are loved  
>God knows we're worth it - and we're worth it<em>

_I won't give up on us_  
><em>Even if the skies get rough<em>  
><em>I'm giving you all my love<em>  
><em>I'm still looking up<em>

Clapping and hugs from the group, particularly Garcia, pulled them back into the present. After a few more dances, sometimes with the each other and some with the others, they were silenced by Rossi taping his glass. Everyone grabbed a flute of champagne. "They say that good things happen to good people. These are one of those things, and you are two of those people. Congratulations, Jennifer and Spencer. We love you."

"To second chances," Hotch added as the group clanked glasses.

The newlyweds exchanged a glance and kissed. No truer words had been spoken to describe how they pair felt at that moment.

* * *

><p><strong>The End!<strong>

_The song is "I won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz. Thanks to all who have read/reviewed/favorited/added to alerts. This has become my longest story, with the 3rd most reviews as of now, most viewed, 2nd most favorites, and most alerts. It just shows how much people love JJ/Reid, I guess! Thanks again for all the support. Next up is an NCIS/Criminal Minds crossover that my beta has requested. Keep an eye out, it may be a month or so before it starts to appear - have an idea but it isn't quite started yet. After that, maybe I'll start a sequel of this one? We'll see._

_Thanks again, Ann Parker  
><em>


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